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Nymph Homebrew Race for Mythic Odyssey of Theros

2020.09.20 20:03 LoneWolf1ngIt Nymph Homebrew Race for Mythic Odyssey of Theros

Hello! This is my homebrew race designed for the content in the Mythic Odyssey of Theros Sourcebook. I got around to doing this because I'm planning on limiting the available pleyer races for the campaign I'm running to the Theros races, but found the selection to be slightly limiting. I was actually surprised to see that Nymphs weren't a player race in the book, so voila. Here we are. I used the Theros sourcebook for the race and sub-race descriptions, alignments, and a few spells and features, the player's handbook for some other spells, the monster manual for Dryads, this post from here for many of the features, and thi#Nymph_Traits)s homebrew Nymph page on the Dungeons and Dragons wiki for height and weight. I'm pretty happy with how it turned out, but could use some balancing feedback, because not only will this be my first time running Theros material, it'll be my first time dming for a campaign.
To my understanding, it seems that races for the most part have 4-5 features, so I did my best to match that, but I worry I may be going over that a bit. I'm also still trying to figure out a spell to give to Lampads for their Innate Spellcasting as they were absent from the post I borrowed from, and the sourcebook only had two innate spellcasting spells for them. I was looking for 1st level spell slot spells they would be able to use at level 3 that would thematically fit with them. additionally I also think I should probably do away with each sub-races respective skill proficiency boost, but I'm still a bit hesitant to do so as: One, it would parallel the other races of Theros that also have those skill boosts nicely, and two, the strength of Nymphs are very heavily tied to their respective terrain, so I worry they may be a bit situational. But at the same time, their strength in those situations may already be enough, so I might just be overcompensating. Regardless, they're in parentheses to separate them out from the rest of the post. I also realize The Elemental affinity feature might also need looking at as well. I welcome any and all feedback! Thank you for taking a look!!!
Race: Nymph
Divine servants that inhabit unspoiled corners of the world, nymphs protect places of natural power and infuse their surroundings with the magic of Nyx. Some are benevolent and aid those who live off the land, while others embody violent aspects of nature. In either case, nymphs generally avoid other sapient creatures, preferring to mind the cycles of nature, the daily interplay of wild animals, or other cosmic forces. Occasionally, though, groups of the same kind of nymphs congregate in a place of natural power or beauty. In times of special need, deities tied to facets of nature might employ nymphs as messengers, guardians, or scouts.
Age: Possibly immortal, varies depending on habitat
Size: From 4’7” to 5’ 9”, slender build, weigh from 90 to 145 lbs., medium
Speed: 30’ (30’ swimming for Naiads)
Ability Score Increase: +1 wisdom, +1 charisma
Features
Languages: You can write, speak, and read Common and Sylvan

Nymphs Associated Damage Resistance Associated Damage Weakness Habitat
Dryad Acidic Fire Trees in Forest
Naiad Psychic (chill instead?) Poison Rivers/Ocean/Lakes
Oread Fire Chill Mountains/ Volcanoes
Alseid Radiant Necrotic Grasslands/ Plains
Lampad Necrotic Radiant Caves/Tunnels/Graveyards
Sub-Race: Dryad
Description from Monster Manual: Travelers entering a forest might catch a glimpse of a feminine form flitting through the trees. Warm laughter hangs on the air, drawing those who hear it deeper into the emerald shadows.
Treebound. Powerful fey will sometimes bind lesser fey spirits to trees, transforming them into dryads. This is sometimes done as a punishment when the fey spirit falls in love with a mortal and that love is forbidden. A dryad can emerge from the tree and travel the lands around it, but the tree remains her home and roots her to the world. As long as the tree remains healthy and unharmed, the dryad stays forever youthful and alluring. If the tree is harmed, she suffers. If the tree is ever destroyed, the dryad descends into madness.
Reclusive Fey. Dryads act as guardians of their woodland demesnes. Shy and reclusive, they watch interlopers from the trees. A dryad struck by the beauty of a stranger might investigate more closely, perhaps even try to lure the individual away to be charmed. Dryads work with other sylvan creatures to defend their forests. Unicorns, treants, and satyrs live alongside them, in addition to druids that share the dryads' devotion to the woods they call home.
Alignment: Neutral
Ability Score Increase: +1 Wisdom
Features:
Sub-Race: Naiad
Description from Theros Sourcebook: Naiads live in and near water. They might be spotted among rivers and lakes, on isolated shores, or amid coral labyrinths and deep sea fumaroles. Wherever rivers and seas show their variety and force, naiads gather to revel in nature's might. Individual naiads often grow fixated with a single type or body of water, potentially preferring a deep sea trench, coastline, or river system above all others. Over time, such a resident nymph often becomes connected with their aquatic home through sightings and stories, becoming a guardian of the place and, in effect, a manifestation of its personality.
Aquatic Collectors. Curious by nature, naiads often seek out what the seas and rivers claim. As a result, they might be found among sunken ruins and shipwrecks, sifting through the remains for whatever catches their eye. Living creatures aren't exempt from this curiosity, either. Naiads are known to befriend aquatic creatures, or even to keep modest menageries. The occasional star-crossed castaway has even been known to become part of such collections.
Secret Routes of the Sea. Sailors across the world claim that naiads know all the secret aquatic routes of Theros. Using this hidden system of currents and arteries, a ship might reach any destination in record time, be it across the sea or along a river a hundred miles inland. Naiads do nothing to dissuade sailors from this belief, and certainly numerous reports tell of charmed nymphs leading lost seafarers home. Yet, if tales of naiad-led galleys appearing amid the headwaters of mountain rivers are true, only the nymphs know for sure.
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Ability Score Increase: +1 Intelligence
Features:
Sub-Race: Alseid
Description from Theros Sourcebook: Touched with the golden light of the sun, Alseids inhabit meadows, plains, and lands of cultivated natural beauty. Many live in closer proximity to human civilization than other nymphs. Farmers are grateful for the presence of alseids on their lands and often leave them offerings of mead, honey, flowers, and dates in return for protecting their flocks and making their crops more abundant.
Alignment: Chaotic Good
Ability Score improvements: +1 Charisma
Features:
Sub-Race: Lampad
Description from Theros Sourcebook: Lampads guard the shadowed paths of the world, depths typically trod by souls destined for the Underworld. These rarely seen nymphs assist Athreos in guiding the dead, moving among the spirits that collect along the Tartyx River and reclaiming wayward souls that try to slip back to the mortal world. This means lampads are most often spotted in graveyards, crumbling crypts, and tunnels that bore deep into the earth, and near portals to the Underworld.
Alignment: Neutral Evil
Ability Score Improvement: +1 Constitution
Features:
Sub-Race: Oread
Description from Theros Sourcebook: Aggressive oreads number among the most dangerous nymphs, as they embody the wild might of flames, volcanism, and the hidden forces of the earth. These creatures typically dwell in remote mountain crags and near volcanoes, where they caper among the forces of dissolution and rebirth. During avalanches and volcanic eruptions, groups of oreads might race ahead of the destruction, dancing, singing, and doing what they can to maximize the impending devastation.
Honor Among Fey. Hearkening back to some ages-old conflict, oreads refuse to knowingly destroy any land inhabited by another nymph. While they won't work to alter the natural course of destruction, neither will they make another nymph's home part of any calamity they encourage. As a result, part of what makes an alseid's field or a dryad's grove seem so blessed is that oreads go out of their way to leave such sites alone.
Tales of Fire. The followers of Purphoros regard oreads with special reverence, as myths tell of cagey smiths befriending these nymphs and convincing them to aid in creating phenomenal works. In some tales, a smith finds an oread and allows it to relish in the destruction of a novel or remarkable item. In recompense, the oread provides the smith with materials drawn from the burning heart of the world, allowing the smith to create an even greater wonder. In more tales, though, a smith pursues an oread, then later the mortal's associates find familiar tools and a heap of ashes.
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Ability score Improvements: -1 wisdom, +1 strength, +1 dexterity
Features:
submitted by LoneWolf1ngIt to UnearthedArcana [link] [comments]


2020.09.20 19:27 LoneWolf1ngIt Nymph Homebrew Race for Mythic Odyssey of Theros Campaign

Hello! This is my homebrew race designed for the Mythic Odyssey of Theros Sourcebook. I got around to doing this because I'm planning on limiting the available plyer races for the campaign I'm going to run to the Theros races, but found the selection to be slightly limiting. I was actually surprised to see that Nymphs weren't a player race in the book, so voila. Here we are. I used the Theros sourcebook for the race and sub-race descriptions, alignments, and a few spells and features, the player's handbook for some other spells, the monster manual for Dryads, this post from UnearthedArcana for many of the features, and this#Nymph_Traits) homebrew Nymph page on the Dungeons and Dragons wiki for height and weight. I'm pretty happy with how it turned out, but could use some balancing feedback, because not only will this be my first time running Theros material, it'll be my first time dming for a campaign.
To my understanding, it seems that races for the most part have 4-5 features, so I did my best to match that, but I worry I may be going over that a bit. I'm also still trying to figure out a spell to give to Lampads for their Innate Spellcasting as they were absent from the post I borrowed from, and the sourcebook only had two innate spellcasting spells for them. I was looking for 1st level spell slot spells they would be able to use at level 3 that would thematically fit with them. additionally I also think I should probably do away with each sub-races respective skill proficiency boost, but I'm still a bit hesitant to do so as: One, it would parallel the other races of Theros that also have those skill boosts nicely, and two, the strength of Nymphs are very heavily tied to their respective terrain, so I worry they may be a bit situational. But at the same time, their strength in those situations may already be enough, so I might just be overcompensating. Regardless, they're in parentheses to separate them out from the rest of the post. I also realize The Elemental affinity feature might also need looking at as well. I welcome any and all feedback! Thank you for taking a look!!!
Race: Nymph
Divine servants that inhabit unspoiled corners of the world, nymphs protect places of natural power and infuse their surroundings with the magic of Nyx. Some are benevolent and aid those who live off the land, while others embody violent aspects of nature. In either case, nymphs generally avoid other sapient creatures, preferring to mind the cycles of nature, the daily interplay of wild animals, or other cosmic forces. Occasionally, though, groups of the same kind of nymphs congregate in a place of natural power or beauty. In times of special need, deities tied to facets of nature might employ nymphs as messengers, guardians, or scouts.
Age: Possibly immortal, varies depending on habitat
Size: From 4’7” to 5’ 9”, slender build, weigh from 90 to 145 lbs., medium
Speed: 30’ (30’ swimming for Naiads)
Ability Score Increase: +1 wisdom, +1 charisma
Features
Languages: You can write, speak, and read Common and Sylvan

Nymph Sub-Race Associated Damage Resistance Associated Damage Weakness Habitat
Dryad Acidic Fire Tree in woodlands/forests
Naiad Psychic Poison Body of water in Sea or River
Oread Fire Chill Mountainous/volcanic region
Alseid Radiant Necrotic Grasslands/ Plains
Lampad Necrotic Radiant Graveyards/subterranean areas

Sub-Race: Dryad
Description from Monster Manual: Travelers entering a forest might catch a glimpse of a feminine form flitting through the trees. Warm laughter hangs on the air, drawing those who hear it deeper into the emerald shadows.
Treebound. Powerful fey will sometimes bind lesser fey spirits to trees, transforming them into dryads. This is sometimes done as a punishment when the fey spirit falls in love with a mortal and that love is forbidden. A dryad can emerge from the tree and travel the lands around it, but the tree remains her home and roots her to the world. As long as the tree remains healthy and unharmed, the dryad stays forever youthful and alluring. If the tree is harmed, she suffers. If the tree is ever destroyed, the dryad descends into madness.
Reclusive Fey. Dryads act as guardians of their woodland demesnes. Shy and reclusive, they watch interlopers from the trees. A dryad struck by the beauty of a stranger might investigate more closely, perhaps even try to lure the individual away to be charmed. Dryads work with other sylvan creatures to defend their forests. Unicorns, treants, and satyrs live alongside them, in addition to druids that share the dryads' devotion to the woods they call home.
Alignment: Neutral
Ability Score Increase: +1 Wisdom
Features:
Sub-Race: Naiad
Description from Theros Sourcebook: Naiads live in and near water. They might be spotted among rivers and lakes, on isolated shores, or amid coral labyrinths and deep sea fumaroles. Wherever rivers and seas show their variety and force, naiads gather to revel in nature's might. Individual naiads often grow fixated with a single type or body of water, potentially preferring a deep sea trench, coastline, or river system above all others. Over time, such a resident nymph often becomes connected with their aquatic home through sightings and stories, becoming a guardian of the place and, in effect, a manifestation of its personality.
Aquatic Collectors. Curious by nature, naiads often seek out what the seas and rivers claim. As a result, they might be found among sunken ruins and shipwrecks, sifting through the remains for whatever catches their eye. Living creatures aren't exempt from this curiosity, either. Naiads are known to befriend aquatic creatures, or even to keep modest menageries. The occasional star-crossed castaway has even been known to become part of such collections.
Secret Routes of the Sea. Sailors across the world claim that naiads know all the secret aquatic routes of Theros. Using this hidden system of currents and arteries, a ship might reach any destination in record time, be it across the sea or along a river a hundred miles inland. Naiads do nothing to dissuade sailors from this belief, and certainly numerous reports tell of charmed nymphs leading lost seafarers home. Yet, if tales of naiad-led galleys appearing amid the headwaters of mountain rivers are true, only the nymphs know for sure.
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Ability Score Increase: +1 Intelligence
Features:
Sub-Race: Alseid
Description from Theros Sourcebook: Touched with the golden light of the sun, Alseids inhabit meadows, plains, and lands of cultivated natural beauty. Many live in closer proximity to human civilization than other nymphs. Farmers are grateful for the presence of alseids on their lands and often leave them offerings of mead, honey, flowers, and dates in return for protecting their flocks and making their crops more abundant.
Alignment: Chaotic Good
Ability Score improvements: +1 Charisma
Features:
Sub-Race: Lampad
Description from Theros Sourcebook: Lampads guard the shadowed paths of the world, depths typically trod by souls destined for the Underworld. These rarely seen nymphs assist Athreos in guiding the dead, moving among the spirits that collect along the Tartyx River and reclaiming wayward souls that try to slip back to the mortal world. This means lampads are most often spotted in graveyards, crumbling crypts, and tunnels that bore deep into the earth, and near portals to the Underworld.
Alignment: Neutral Evil
Ability Score Improvement: +1 Constitution
Features:
Sub-Race: Oread
Description from Theros Sourcebook: Aggressive oreads number among the most dangerous nymphs, as they embody the wild might of flames, volcanism, and the hidden forces of the earth. These creatures typically dwell in remote mountain crags and near volcanoes, where they caper among the forces of dissolution and rebirth. During avalanches and volcanic eruptions, groups of oreads might race ahead of the destruction, dancing, singing, and doing what they can to maximize the impending devastation.
Honor Among Fey. Hearkening back to some ages-old conflict, oreads refuse to knowingly destroy any land inhabited by another nymph. While they won't work to alter the natural course of destruction, neither will they make another nymph's home part of any calamity they encourage. As a result, part of what makes an alseid's field or a dryad's grove seem so blessed is that oreads go out of their way to leave such sites alone.
Tales of Fire. The followers of Purphoros regard oreads with special reverence, as myths tell of cagey smiths befriending these nymphs and convincing them to aid in creating phenomenal works. In some tales, a smith finds an oread and allows it to relish in the destruction of a novel or remarkable item. In recompense, the oread provides the smith with materials drawn from the burning heart of the world, allowing the smith to create an even greater wonder. In more tales, though, a smith pursues an oread, then later the mortal's associates find familiar tools and a heap of ashes.
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Ability score Improvements: -1 wisdom, +1 strength, +1 dexterity
Features:
submitted by LoneWolf1ngIt to DnD [link] [comments]


2020.09.19 16:50 Christopher_Maxim I'm an office tech at a company that works with NASA. I should have never looked through their secret archive.

I don't work for NASA. I'm a lowly office tech at a company affiliated with NASA. We store data off-site mostly concerning their many, secret unmanned missions to the moon, including the countless ones that took place in between the Apollo launches. There are regular landings, even today. As you can imagine, we're not on the books. Still, we are a necessary facet of the space administration's delicate infrastructure.
Now that you're up to speed with where I work, I can tell you about the room. Room 371 to be precise; the overseer's office.
It always had an air of mystery about it. I, and other staff members, had been inside before; tasked with leaving behind flash drives filled with sensitive information for the overseer to upload to our database. You see, the sole computer in that room is an offline archive containing almost every one of NASA's dirty little secrets. Stuff that we can't risk getting out in the event of a data breach. If anyone were to hack our online mainframe, they would only find decoy files - outlying pieces of data that have already been in the public's eye.
Most of the information I dealt with amounted to mundane statistical analyses. The real interesting, controversial stuff was sent directly to the overseer, bypassing the prying eyes of entry-level employment.
That brings us to yesterday.
It was a normal drop-off assignment. Bring the flash-drive to Room 371, leave it on the desk, and shut the door on your way out. I had done it countless times before. This time, however, was a little different. After placing the drive on the desk, I noticed a faint glow on the wall behind it. The computer was on. This was strange. It was always shut down by the overseer after a data dump. The only times I had ever seen it turned on were days when he was in there, still working.
I admit, my curiosity got the better of me.
With a slight spike in adrenaline, I walked around the desk and sat at the chair, ready to take back at least one mystery to the hive-mind on the main floor.
The convenience in this moment cannot be understated. I later discovered that the overseer was sick and had rushed to the bathroom, where he remained for at least forty minutes. Not only was the computer on, but it was unlocked. Even our personal workstations required a series of passwords that changed, daily. Passwords we had to spend the first ten minutes of any given work day decrypting. This was the one and only chance I had to placate my curiosity and dig for the buried treasures of NASA. I knew there just had to be something in the confines of our database that would elicit a gasp or mouth drop. Something I would remember for the rest of my years.
In settling in at the desk, my heart pounding at the thought of the overseer's return, I noticed the computer was calibrated just like the rest of our PCs. Because of this, I knew just what folders to open and what digital stones to turn on my hunt for secrets. Most files were your run-of-the-mill storage vessels; data pertaining to the boring truths of the trade; statistics and physics predictions. After a few minutes of searching, I almost called it quits, but one document caught my eye. It was titled Project Burial at Sea. This was what I wanted. A classified NASA project, never before released to the public.
In this moment, secrets were revealed to me. Ones I soon wished I had never unearthed.
As is common with these types of documents, the jargon was very straight-forward and low on description. As such, I had to piece together bits of information to form a clear picture of the proposal and subsequent missions that apparently started at the turn of our current century. What I discovered did indeed elicit a gasp. It also made my skin crawl.
Project Burial at Sea was, ironically enough, a fail-safe against information leaks. It implemented the pre-existing infrastructure of NASA's unmanned missions to dispose of "cracks" in the system. That is, individuals likely to come clean about privileged information.
Yes, you heard right. Individuals. NASA was killing off would-be whistle blowers to protect their assets.
The initial proposal called for sending the bodies into deep space, but too many unknown variables presented themselves. If even one probe was knocked back to earth by an asteroid or unforeseen space event, the entire operation would be done for; especially if it landed in enemy territory. At that point, another country could use it to blackmail our government for aid and financial gain. Burying the bodies on the moon prevented this, and eliminated all potential evidence tying anyone to the crime. The people who vanished made up a very small portion of NASA, so the ratio of missing persons in relation to their workforce was barely disrupted, deflecting any potential suspicion.
After a rigorous sterilization procedure, the bodies are stuffed into the hollow spaces of the previously unmanned probes. Once they reach the lunar surface, they are collected by rovers (of which there are many more than you're aware of) and buried in the craters of a specific section of the moon's dark side. In other words, mass graves. The rovers later collect samples to determine the long-term effects of the soil on human decomposition. This was not the purpose of the project, just an added benefit.
I was floored. This document was not what I expected. I couldn't believe this sort of thing would happen in our country, and at NASA of all places, an organization I was involved with. After closing the file and navigating back to the home-screen, I left Room 371 and shut the door, my worldview shattered.
Upon returning to my workstation, my co-worker, Bill, questioned me.
"Jack, where were you? Did you hear the overseer retching in the bathroom? Poor guy has that stomach bug that's been going around."
I politely nodded but offered no response to the initial query, still shaken. Bill buried his face back in his work.
Eventually, the overseer returned, the sound of Room 371's creaky iron door slamming shut behind him as he resumed work at his desk. Beads of sweat formed above my brow as I wondered if he would notice something amiss and know I perused the archive. My heart began racing as the paranoia took hold. I had to tell someone about my discovery. Perhaps I misinterpreted the information. Maybe Bill could put my mind at ease. He was a nice guy. Not the type to break a promise or betray his fellow worker.
"Bill," I whispered, "Have you heard anything about NASA sending corpses to the moon?"
He stared at me a moment, an overly serious expression painted across his face. Then he laughed.
"Jack, you are a card. Where do you come up with this stuff, anyway? You should write a book."
Without so much as a sound to alert his arrival, the overseer put his hand on my shoulder. I nearly jumped out of my skin.
"Jack, I've been meaning to talk to you. A big promotion in the works. Meet me in my office in ten minutes."
With that, he loosened his grip and traveled back to Room 371. My eyes widened and my heart sank. Bill noticed something was wrong.
"What's wrong, Jack? You look as though you've seen a ghost. Promotions are a big deal around here. Only one every few months or so. Lisa was promoted last year and went on to supervise one of the unmanned probe launches. Haven't heard from her since."
I turned to Bill and met his gaze.
"Bill, it's been nice working with you."
He smiled before turning back to his computer.
"You too, Jack."
***
Ten, torturous minutes came and went. I hesitantly made my way to Room 371 and slowly opened the door. The overseer gestured for me to come in.
"Have a seat, Jack. And close the door."
I unwillingly obliged. The thought of making a run for it crossed my mind, but I knew the security detail at the front gate would stop me. Drawing attention to myself would only serve to expedite my demise.
"So... what is this about?" I asked, my breathing now labored and sporadic.
"Like I said before, it's a promotion. NASA is recruiting from its affiliate outfits to supervise some of their unmanned launches. You've been selected."
I tilted my head in disbelief.
"But sir, why me? I haven't done anything to warrant such a promotion, to my knowledge."
He grinned.
"That's where you're wrong, Jack. We've been watching you. We know what you did. You can't deny it any longer."
With a wicked smile, he stood up from his desk and walked over to me, his arms outstretched in my direction. His shadow covered the entire room. Or at least, it seemed that way in the moment. Without realizing it, I had backed myself into the corner, almost cowering in fear. That's when the door opened and my co-workers flooded the room.
"Surprise!"
I stood upright, shocked.
"What's going on?"
Bill responded.
"Don't you know what day it is, Jack?"
The overseer pointed at his wall calendar. It was September 18th, which according to them, was my hire date.
It all made sense now. It was a ruse. A practical joke at my expense. The overseer sometimes did this on workplace anniversaries - but not for many years at this point, and never to this elaborate extent. I didn't even realize what day it was until they pointed it out.
"Did you really think I would leave my computer on, unattended?"
Bill chimed in.
"Bodies can't even decompose on the moon, Jack. There's no air!"
They both let out hearty laughs. I laughed too, thoroughly relieved.
***
The rest of the afternoon was nice. After all was said and done, we returned to work, invigorated by the positive surge of energy and morale. After finishing my leftover tasks, I left with a smile on my face, happy to be earth-side, alive and well. This mood would follow me the whole way home, but it wasn't alone.
When I parked in my driveway, someone pulled in behind me. The overseer stepped out of the car and greeted me with a friendly wave.
"Jack, can we talk?"
House calls were unorthodox in our line of work, but not unheard of.
"Of course, Colter. Please come in."
He followed me inside and joined me in the living room. I sat down, but he paced at the fireplace, looking over my family photos on the mantle.
"You know, what Bill said was true. Bodies don't decompose on the moon. That bit was added by NASA. They put falsehoods in all of their classified documents. It's another fail-safe; a detail they can point to in the event of a leak to make it seem illegitimate."
I was utterly confused.
"I'm not sure I follow. What are you getting at, exactly?"
He turned to me, a stern look painted across his face.
"It's all real, Jack. The dead bodies, the craters; everything. You should have never sat at my desk."
I chuckled.
"Come on, Colter. The joke's over. No need to drag it out."
He wasn't laughing.
"This is no joke. You were hired in July, not September. I sent out a last-minute memo to everyone in an attempt to avert your suspicion. Here, we can discuss things privately."
"Very funny. You're forgetting about my wife and daughter."
A smirk touched the side of his cheek. He tossed me an envelope. Inside were photos of my wife picking up our daughter from school. My heart sank.
"What the hell is this, Colter? Are you following my family around?"
"We've intercepted them. Let's just say they'll be late getting home, tonight."
The gravity of the situation was beginning to sink in. If everything I saw was indeed real, then I was now a target. I would soon become the next NASA casualty buried at sea. If I didn't escape and get help, Charlotte and Leslie would never be saved.
My eyes darted for the door. Colter noticed.
"I wouldn't run if I were you. I didn't come alone."
My blood boiling, I was tempted to lash out in anger.
"Don't worry. They're safe."
I remained silent, but livid.
"There are things in the universe you can't begin to understand. Things not only above your pay-grade, but above your understanding. Things human words could never hope to describe."
"Human?" I asked, perplexed by the wording.
"Yes, Jack. Let me show you."
What happened next was enough to put my mouth on the floor.
Using his right hand and a single circular motion in the air, Colter opened up a portal. A fucking portal- one that seemed to connect my living room to the moon. I could even see Earth off in the distance.
"WHAT IN GOD'S NAME IS THAT?!" I shouted.
"Come, Jack. Get a closer look."
As his hostage, I had no choice but to humor his demands. Upon stepping up to the void, still frazzled, I saw it. A crater, filled to the brim with corpses.
"Why... why are you showing me this?" I asked in a shaky voice.
"Just watch, Jack."
I looked back to the scene and noticed something at the edge of the crater. Three, shadowy figures, far too tall to be human. They extended their arms and a glow rained down from the space above the crater.
The corpses... they moved.
I watched in horror as the bodies were re-animated- but these were not living things. They were shells controlled by a puppeteer, bent to its sinister will. The three shadows became one and formed an archway, a blinding brightness pouring out from within. One by one, the corpses walked into the light until, finally, the crater was emptied. Then, the light dissipated, and the shadows spun in unison, taking off at great speed into the abyss of deep space.
With another wave of his arm, Colter closed the portal. I was speechless.
"You see, Jack, Project Burial at Sea is more than a safety measure. It's a necessary sacrifice to them."
"So... all those bodies?" I asked.
"No, no. Only some were would-be whistle blowers. The rest; John and Jane Does, left at morgues across the country with no relatives to claim them."
"Where did they take them?" I asked.
"To the place where they live. There, they are forced to build. Stuck in the space between life and death for an eternity, slaves of an alien race. It's a truly terrible fate. We would all be there right now, if not for the deal we struck back in 1947. These creatures don't bode well in our atmosphere. We placate their every need to keep them from a developing a technology capable of mitigating the effect our air has on their bodies and spacecraft."
I couldn't believe it. Everything I knew up to that point was a lie.
Colter walked to the door.
"I like you, Jack. That's why I'm telling you all of this. I want to keep you on. You're a good man, and a good worker. If you don't want to end up like the poor souls up on that hunk of space rock, you'll keep your mouth shut."
I heard a car pull in outside.
"Looks like your wife and daughter are home. We just took them out for ice cream."
Before closing the door on his way out, the overseer turned back with a smile.
"See you on Monday, Jack."
submitted by Christopher_Maxim to nosleep [link] [comments]


2020.09.18 18:35 rudexvirus Comatose

Hi! This was written for a horror contest earlier in the year. I haven't had much luck with it, and thought it might do to get crits for a rewrite/learn how to make the next one better ;D

Comatose

Callie’s head fell against the chair’s faded blue upholstery. “Today marks the second anniversary of our first date, Hannah. Last year you waved your hands around for 15 minutes telling me it was the wrong day.”
She listened to the ventilator across the room for a moment and scoffed. “You know… I remembered our anniversary. I remember it took you six months to agree that we were official, and another three to let me meet your family.”
Silence. “You would never admit the truth to me, but I always suspected I was your first.” A frog jumped down her throat, causing a lump too big to continue. The entire reason she sat in the rotting hospital furniture was to talk to her, and when she couldn’t do that through the sobs… feeling useless was an understatement.
“Do you remember how long we sat there in that corner booth? The light bulb blew, and it took another half an hour for our waitress to come by and notice.”
The frog moved as she swallowed. Guilt, grief, nostalgia -- uncomfortable emotions coming out of nowhere, making it difficult to function. She wanted to cry, and her heart raced.
Instead, she laughed. A shallow, joke-less, air-filled laugh. Even as she walked through the motions of having a comatose girlfriend, her memories were too scattered to handle at that moment. Every time she took a breath, she lost the thread of where she was going, and her thoughts jumped to a different place; a different thing she had always meant to say.
“I love you, Hannah.”
Callie snuck out of the room before the nurses came by. They tried to thank her sometimes, but it was just another reminder of everything they both had lost.
She shook her head and forced her feet to continue walking through the faded hospital hallway.
Tomorrow was another day. It was the last thought she gave the yellow-lit, claustrophobic, dying room, and the thought melted away as the sunlight hit her face. Bright and warm and alive.
She needed all the warmth that the world offered since people and their emotions zapped so much from her. She basked in the summer sun and tried to do ‘normal’ things to re-energize.
A movie. Dinner. A restless night’s sleep.
Instead, her body ended up in the sinking chair again. She watched as an older, stern-looking nurse took vitals and wrote in Hannah’s ever-thickening chart. The corners of her mouth turned downward and wondered for a moment how the nurses slept at night. Probably like logs, having shed all their stupid problems at people like Callie.
The older woman squinted at her before leaving. Something about that generation. The generation that had glared every time the couple had held hands; the generation that had shoved her to the side the night Hannah had come into the hospital. That generation could go screw themselves. It wasn’t like any of them did the things Callie made time to do.
They didn’t sit here every day talking to the shell of what used to be a vibrant woman. They didn’t wade around impolite conversation so that if she ever woke up, she would remember the quality times and not the fights.
Or the accident. God help her if Hannah woke up and remembered the accident.
A sigh filled the room.
“I remember the first day I saw you.” Callie smiled. It was one of their best memories. Before the fights. Before things progressed too far to turn back. “You took my breath away.”
One leg crossed over the other, and her eyes lost focus as she daydreamed. “You distracted me so thoroughly that I stopped mid-walk and forgot where I was going. After we spoke, I ended up going back home, only to get a phone call hours later.”
Callie had never told Hannah where she had been going that day, even though the question had come up.
Her eyes refocused, scanning her surroundings.
The dim room that would have been her day that fateful afternoon wasn’t unlike this one. It sat in silence with a paler, meaner, and much sicker woman laying in it.
Callie felt a tug at her chest, realizing she had never gone back to that other room at all. “I knew I loved you soon after that. Did you know that before you slipped away?”
Callie slid into the lemon smelling chair, burnt coffee threatening to spill out of its cup as she did so.
Muted sounds came from around the cafeteria. The scrape of a fork against glass. A cup settling onto a tray. Chairs being pushed against the fading tile floor. The ice machine groaned.
Finally, a peal of laughter.
It was smooth, and light, and feminine, and it caught her attention so fast she startled. Her head whipped in its direction, pulling a muscle in her neck. Still distracted, Callie set her cup of boiling hot coffee on the table and missed.
It tipped, landing along her legs, and before she could think again, she was screaming in pain. She felt watched as she tried to wipe away the burning liquid. What stopped her was someone pulling on one arm, and whispering in her ear about third-degree burns, and saying she would need to lose her pants, and all remaining thoughts evacuated.
Except for a single inappropriate thought about a beautiful stranger with the name Rachel sewed on her scrubs.
“There was August.”
Callie watched a young, handsome nurse walk through the door, and decided not to let him stop her. Not when she had just found the strength to get going. “We went to pet stores every single day. You would pick the smallest dog at every pound to hold.”
He drew blood, wiped down her IV site and changed her pillow.
The staff would come to turn Hannah later. Once upon a time, she would help; but now it was easier to stay out of the way, and she rarely witnessed the event.
“They knew what we were doing, you know. They never stopped us, though. It probably made some poor thing’s day whenever we came in.”
The man glanced her way as he walked out of the room, raising an eyebrow.
Sometimes it seemed as if they could see straight through her facade, and lately —
Well.
She wasn’t sure the last time one of them had acted grateful that Hannah was getting a visitor. They didn’t understand why no one else came by. They’d never had to listen to her, though.
They wouldn’t understand what a chore the whole thing was.
Silence sat in the room for a quarter of an hour before Callie followed the nurse out of the room. Her strength came back as fast as it disappeared. Rather than leave the hospital, however, she took the elevator down 2 floors and wandered into the cafeteria. She filled a small cup with diet coke, and sat down in the far corner so she could watch the door, and scope out the room.
I just need energy, she thought on repeat.
She needed energy, and space, and light.
When she spent long enough in the hospital, the cafeteria could feel like a bunker. It didn’t exactly offer those things, but that day it was enough. Time in a different room was enough. Her eyes could focus on different things, and it soothed the ache in her temples.
As she watched a group of nurses walk through the door, smiles on their faces, she felt the ball in her stomach grow a little smaller. Watching people feel things on the outside — it helped. Hearing laughter and knowing there was someone who would watch out for her, instead of how she handled her comatose girlfriend…
It helped.
Rachel held a glass in both hands, looking down at the melting ice before meeting Callie’s gaze again. “You go every day?”
The words hung between them. Ambient room noises, and the obnoxious drunk across the bar, ate the actual noises, but the meaning stayed behind.
“Yeah. I guess I just feel like I owe it to her.”
Callie pulled her shoulders back, straightening and stretching her spine. She had leaned over the slab of wood for far too long. She had gone through three shots of whiskey and one with a diet coke because regular hurt the front of her teeth. To be honest, she wasn’t ready for this conversation, and she hadn’t known what to say.
How much of the truth do you tell someone on the first date? What might scare them away? How long would she have waited for the cheating wench to wake up?
So instead she told the woman just enough. Callie’s eyes slowly grazed over the curves of the woman next to her. “I owe it to her, but to be honest, I’m tired.”
Rachel swallowed the liquid left in her glass and then nodded. “I’m sure you are.”
A smile came across the woman’s face that sent Callie’s heart racing in her chest, beating against her ribs, and then leaping into her throat. She was certain that not a soul existed who could have resisted that smile, and here she was, at the receiving end.
The pair swallowed one more shot each before throwing a small pile of cash on the bar and walking out the door. It was windy and cool outside. Weather trying to turn into early fall, with rain on the horizon, but neither of them pulled their sweaters closer, or acted like they cared at all.
The weather disappeared behind the whiskey, the blush, and the prospects of climbing into bed for the first time with someone new.
Callie stood next to Hannah’s hospital bed. Her mouth opened and closed repeatedly until she reached out and grabbed a clammy hand, holding it off the hospital bed to do so. She took a deep breath and pushed the words past the ever-present frog in her throat. “I’m sorry.”
There were footsteps outside the door, nurses and doctors and patients oblivious to the quiet heart that was breaking inside room 317.
Another deep breath and she continued. “I hope someday the doctors tell you how long I tried to wait. I hope someone tells you I came by every single day until…”
An airplane flew by above the hospital, giving the room the slightest vibration, interrupting her thoughts for just a wavelength.
“I hope when you wake up someday, you remember all the good times, and none of the bad. I hope you remember what I did for you, before and after you got here.”
Hannah didn’t stir. Her arm fell with a blanketed thump.
Before anyone else could come in and look sideways, Callie walked back out the door. She was on her way to have a brand new key made for a woman. A woman who could sit up, and speak, and respect her.
A woman who was waiting for her to make a very special drink and spend a very special night. They were about to spend a lot of quality time together. The moment Callie’s body crossed the threshold of the hospital into the afternoon air, a smile flew onto her face.
Today was indeed very special, and it was her very favorite part of a new relationship.
Well, she thought to herself as she made her way to her car, Maybe the second favorite. Or maybe third. There was the first kiss and the very first time in bed. The third was the day she made them understand their place in life.
The day they went from controlling little bitches to a brand new puppet. The day they learned about respect.
Hannah had been too weak and ended up a vegetable. So many of them had been weak, but this time would be different.
This time she would get it right and be able to take care of her possession at home.
submitted by rudexvirus to WPCritique [link] [comments]


2020.09.18 13:14 House_of_Suns /r/QOTSA Official Band of the Week 20: RADIOHEAD

Ah, change. Don't we all love it? Don't we all hate it? Remember moving out of your parents house and into some dingy college dorm for the first time? Getting married and having children? How about being forced by a global pandemic to live inside for literal months?
Yep. Change can be good, like the kind you find in your couch cushions. But change can also be very, very bad, like the kind of change that Weezer went through, going from indie rock darlings to a meme-driven cover band. Side note: get your fucking shit together, Rivers Cuomo. Either way, change is often divisive - and this concept is core to understanding today’s band of the week.
There is constant pressure for an artist to evolve and change their sound, to develop and create something new. Any real songwriter knows that they can’t just slap a different label on the same can and sell it back to their audience without losing the respect of their peers...unless you happen to be AC/DC, who somehow made the same album 15 times with two different singers. The pop industry’s oversaturated mess of recycled garbage is never going to be admired by critics, even though pre-programmed FM radio and tweens seem to love it.
Our very own Queens of prehistory are the perfect example of how an artist can experiment and advance their sound from record to record. Every album builds on the last one and takes their sound in a new direction. This can be both amazing AND divisive, depending on your point of view.
Today, we will look at a band that did even more. These guys went through one of the most daring style changes in music history, and came out the other side completely unscathed. They’re a shining example of how to evolve, and how to not only change your sound, but to change the very concept of rock music.
You guessed it, today’s artist is none other than RADIOHEAD
About Them
You know how music makes you happy?
This is not that kind of music.
If you are looking for a pick-me-up, for that Walkin’ On Sunshine vibe to make you bop down the sidewalk, then you need to run far, far away from this band. It is not that their music is Soundgarden-dark or Alice In Chains-dark. It is not NIN-angry or RATM-angry. Radiohead sounds like someone compressed a rainy day, mixed in two gallons of melancholy, got a distillation of being dumped by your girlfriend, and then made you watch your puppy get run over...twice. It is sorrow and regret and woe and dejection all brewed in a cauldron of gloom.
And it punches you right in the fucking feels, every time.
The band is made up of brothers Jonny Greenwood (who rivals Keaunu Reeves with his ability to somehow not age) on guitar and keys, Colin Greenwood on bass, Philip Selway on drums, Ed O’Brien on guitar and backing vocals, and the king of falsetto himself, Thom Yorke, on vocals, keys, and guitar. The five guys from the County of Oxfordshire in England all met in school. In the classic story of teenage rebellion, they got together and formed a band that no one had ever heard of called On A Friday. The band played together all through their teenage years and into university. As they cut their teeth on the local club and tavern circuit, the band got tighter and tighter. This was noted by Chris Hufford and Bryce Edge, who saw them play and were so impressed with their raw talent that they helped them record a demo tape and became the band’s managers - a position they still hold today. The demo was shopped to a number of record labels. The net result was that On A Friday was signed to a six-album deal with EMI.
Clearly, we all know and own On A Friday albums today, don’t we? Nope. At the request of their label, they changed their name to the moniker we all know now. The name was inspired by a Talking Heads tune. Clearly, David Byrne must have had a stash of band names hidden somewhere in his comically oversized suit.
The newly-minted Radiohead caught their ticket to fame with the song Creep. You have to remember that when the world were listening to Soundgarden and Kyuss and Stone Temple Pilots and Nirvana crank out amazing grungy, sludgy riffs and tunes, Radiohead rode a wave of self-loathing and awkwardness to international fame. The brilliance of Creep lies in the fact that its lyrics and its music are in direct contrast to each other. When you listen to Thom Yorke lament the fact that he is not worthy of wooing the girl he is chasing, you become sad. But the soaring major chords of the guitar pivot from one to another and create a cognitive dissonance. The music makes you feel the emotional joy of the man who fixates on his crush while the lyrics simultaneously show the soul destroying experience of his unrequited longing.
As it turns out, lots and lots of people have felt this kind of doubt and anguish. Creep was a bonafide hit and is still the band’s most successful single. It made their debut album, Pablo Honey, a world wide best seller. The band’s first international tour as an opening act for Belly and PJ Harvey saw them play the song every night to crowds who knew and sang every word.
The net result? They grew to absolutely hate the song, to the point where they abjectly refused to play it live for years at a time. The irony is, of course, that the incredible success of that one tune gave them immense freedom to experiment with their sound.
Their second album, The Bends, was no happier than the first. The tune My Iron Lung has the lyrics This is our new song, just like the last one, a total waste of time, which was a commentary on the fan’s reaction to Creep. But in a twist of fate, reviews of My Iron Lung said that it was just like Creep. It was enough to, I don’t know, maybe make your eyelid droop or something.
The Bends was released in 1995 and went platinum. Critics initially did not know what to do with it, as it was a genuine album rather than a few singles surrounded by filler. But classic Radiohead tunes High and Dry, Black Star, Just and Fake Plastic Trees can all be found here. The Chicago Tribune gave it one star out of four, and said that the lyrics were self-absorbed and the music was pretentious. Undeterred, Radiohead toured as an opener for Alanis Morrisette and R.E.M. The influence of this dark and moody album cannot be overstated. Acts like Muse, Coldplay, James Blunt and Garbage all cite it as a direct influence on them. Many Radiohead fans place it second only to OK Computer in the band’s canon.
So did Radiohead’s third album build on that kind of success?
Fuck no.
They had an amazing, world-topping single in Creep and then released an album devoid of singles.
They had a fantastic guitar-driven moody thematic album, and then completely abandoned that sound.
OK Computer is the ultimate anti-consumerist album, and it cemented Radiohead as the kings of progressive rock. One needs only listen to Stephen Hawking spittin’ fire on the tune Fitter Happier to know that this was unlike anything ever released, not just by the band, but by any band. Side note: This Hawking guy gets around, doesn’t he? Collaborating with Mastodon and Radiohead? I’d say with those unique vocal stylings, he has a bright future as a musician.
Everyone loved OK Computer...even The Chicago Tribune. It was immediately hailed by critics as the most important album since Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band and The Dark Side of the Moon. It routinely makes lists of the greatest albums in rock and roll. Listening to it is an emotional roller coaster even now, more than two decades later. It foreshadows the information age and subsequent alienation that we all live in today.
Exit Music (For a Film) was originally written for Leonardo DiCaprio’s Romeo+Juliet, but the movie producers selected Talk Show Host from The Bends instead. Let Down is an absolutely haunting fan favorite that is still part of live sets from the band today. Karma Police, No Surprises, and Lucky were all released as singles from the album, and probably have helped to sell as much kleenex as they did vinyl. But the standout track on their third release was the multi-movement composition Paranoid Android. Named after Marvin the Paranoid Android from The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, this song in four sections regularly appears on lists of the greatest rock songs of all time. The weird animated video cemented the song as an anti-capitalist anthem. It is a truly epic tune that drew immediate comparisons to Bohemian Rhapsody and A Day in the Life. Paranoid Android was over six minutes long and has soaring guitars and choral chanting mixed in with what sounds like an entire effects rack slowly dying by strangulation. It was the most ambitious track on an incredibly ambitious album, and critics loved every single note.
So of course, that meant that Radiohead had to abandon this sound for something entirely different.
The success of OK Computer and the tour that followed led to burnout for the band and writer’s block for Thom Yorke. When it came time to record Kid A, the band did not just take a left turn, they spun completely through a multi-dimensional roundabout. Thom Yorke set about writing the lyrics by cutting up and rearranging common sayings and phrases mixed with violent imagery and turning them into a kind of lyrical collage. In a band with four members who play some kind of guitar, they wrote songs with zero guitar lines. Thom Yorke has said that he approached his vocals on this album not as a singer with lyrics, but to use the voice more as an instrument on its own.
Since OK Computer was such a massive hit, anticipation for Kid A was high. Radiohead refused to do any promotion of the album. Nevertheless, the record company released the artwork and some ‘blips’ from the songs. The band played some tracks on tour and an underground internet market for bootlegs emerged. Three weeks before the release date the entire album was leaked on Napster.
When it was officially released in 2000, critics did not know what to make of it. Radiohead released no singles from the album. Some called Kid A commercial suicide. Others said it was confusing and aimless and self-indulgent, and the only challenging thing about the album was the very real challenge to your attention span. But history has vindicated this soaring, orchestral jazz-inspired album. Tracks like Everything in its Right Place and How to Disappear Completely and Idioteque are fan favorites. And I don’t care who you are, The National Anthem is a complete banger.
So the pattern was established: Each album was a complete pivot, and challenged their listeners to adapt to the new sound. Right?
Wrong again, motherfucker.
Amnesiac, released in 2001, picked up right where Kid A left off. This was completely intentional, since the writing sessions for Kid A had yielded too much material for one album. At one point, a massive double album - Kid Amnesiac? - had been contemplated, but the band decided to split the two. Sometimes derided as the B-Sides from Kid A, Amnesiac saw the band dive straight into ProTools and AutoTune and backmasking every single effect ever. This is blended with influences from Jazz and, presumably, whatever was on BBC World Service that day. They did release a couple of singles, notably Pyramid Song and Knives Out. QotSA fans will love a B-Side off of this album called The Amazing Sounds of Orgy which bears a striking resemblance to music from our paleolithic monarchs.
I’m not sure if you remember or not, but 2001 was a bonkers year. Kid A and Amnesiac were albums that were embracing the shift to the information age and incorporated electronica into music. But in the wake of the terrorist attacks in the US and the subsequent invasions of Iraq and Afghanistan, the entire global mood lurched from one of hope for the future to fear for our safety. Radiohead’s angriest album, Hail to the Thief, released in 2003, and captures that sense of urgency and distress. The core of the album was recorded in two short weeks in Los Angeles, with the band workshopping and completing almost one song per day. Given the complex reengineering that they had previously done on the last three albums, this was a significant shift in process. 2 + 2 = 5 was finished in just two hours.
The lyrics on the album were a grab-bag of quotes from Dante and nursery rhymes and science fiction and reflections on the election of George Bush Jr and the subsequent war on terror. Every song has an alternate title (because, well, Radiohead) and thus an alternate meaning. Ultimately, it is an album that cuts through the fog of war and is a massive critique of what the band perceived as the naked opportunism of turning real tragedy into profit (hence the album title). A little over two months before it was due to release, the album was AGAIN leaked online. This completely pissed off the band , as it was an unpolished version. The actual release was in June of 2003. And of course, Hail to the Thief soared to number one, on the strength of songs like There There and Backdrifts and Scatterbrain and the incredibly angry I Will. Critics fell in love with Radiohead all over again.
Hail to the Thief completed Radiohead’s six-album contract with EMI. This made them the world’s most popular unsigned band. But at this point, they had become too big for any one label, though many came knocking. They went on a hiatus to catch their breath and reflect on where they had come from.
Recording sessions for In Rainbows began in 2005 but stalled. The band tried again in 2006 and stalled again. The band took to the road and played the new songs live to work out the kinks. This seemed to work, because the third time the band went into the studio things started to click. In Rainbows has a post-anger clarity to it. Tunes like Jigsaw Falling into Place and Nude and House of Cards show the band had moved past their past, and were once again pioneers in the new frontier.
But what truly set the album apart from literally anything else in 2007 was the way it was released. Remember how Hail to the Thief and Amnesiac were leaked online? Well, Radiohead did what only a wildly popular unsigned band could do: they released In Rainbows online for free. They just asked people to pay whatever they wanted. This was a tectonic shift in the music industry which had seen profits spiraling downwards with the rise of single song purchases through digital platforms. Free music? For anyone? Once again, Radiohead completely challenged the existing model - just in a brand new way.
Oh, and I cannot stress this enough: Get yourself a set of good headphones and spend 43 minutes just listening to In Rainbows without distraction. It is a god damn amazing album with absolutely fantastic production. It is easily their most accessible album since The Bends.
Fans of Radiohead would have to wait another four years before their eighth album, The King of Limbs, was dropped. Named after a tree in Wiltshire, England, the album again is a shift in sound for the band (I know, I know, this is a complete shock for you). Released as a digital download, management stated that this was the most profitable album for the band out of all of them since there was no record label to feed. The songs are laced with looping and sampling and electronica. Heavy rhythms dominate and are interspersed with wind sounds and bird song. Basically, if you released this album on bandcamp, no one would pay any attention...but Radiohead released it, and it was an instant hit. The video for Lotus Flower spawned Thom Yorke dancing memes, which makes complete sense if you have seen it. It must be experienced to be understood.
Radiohead’s ninth and most recent release is 2016’s A Moon Shaped Pool. Eschewing birdsong this time, this album leans heavily into choir and orchestral and strings and chamber music to craft its sound. It is a broad commentary on climate change and groupthink. Burn the Witch, with its claymation video, is a visual treatise on the dangers of the mob and getting caught up in the moment. True Love Waits was a song that the band had been working on since 1995 and shows them at their disconsolate best.
And yes, A Moon Shaped Pool again hit number one on the charts.
At this point I am certain that Radiohead could piece together the sounds of dumping cutlery on the floor, whalesong and goose honks together with the back-masked theme from The Legend of Zelda to write a song about losing your umbrella on a rainy day...and have a number one hit. And if they do just that, I expect royalties.
What is certain is that fans are eagerly anticipating where Radiohead will go next. They are ready to embrace whatever change Thom Yorke and the boys throw their way, and don’t spend their time bitching about how the latest album from the band just isn’t as good as the rest of their discography.
There is a lesson to be learned there somewhere.
Links to QOTSA
Our prehistoric monarchs and Radiohead both have some things in common. The theme of change is absolutely one of them. Each album is an evolution (or revolution ) from what has gone before, and some of the fanbase can find this challenging.
Interestingly, both bands recorded songs called Burn the Witch, and both are indictments of groupthink. Josh’s version states, There they are, the mob it cries for blood, to twist the tale, into firewood.. Thom Yorke sings, Red crosses on wooden doors, and if you float you burn, loose talk around tables, abandon all reason. Written at different times by different artists, both explore the same theme with different sounds.
Josh has not been shy about how much he loves Radiohead. He has stated, “Not everyone is Radiohead. You’re talking about one of the finest working bands in the world…In Rainbows? I think it’s fucking awesome...it just comes out of a jam and keeps moving, and little things get stacked on top of what we hear before something else gets taken away, you know? It’s very cool. We were in New York when we heard the first single, and we were like shit, they’re haulin’ ass, that’s awesome.”
Both Homme and Thom Yorke have worked (albeit at different times) on the trip hop / alt rock band UNKLE. Yorke appeared on their second album, Psyence Fiction, lending his vocals to the song Rabbit in Your Headlights. Meanwhile, Homme played on their third album, War Stories. In particular, Josh sang on the song Restless, which is a certified banger.
Their Music
Creep -- over 421 MILLION views, incredibly popular, and hated by the band and hard core fans.
High and Dry -- Of course it ends in the rain.
Just -- Just an amazing video that tells an amazing story. Does anyone else still wonder what he said? In my opinion, I think he must have disclosed the reason why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch. This knowledge is too much for mortal men.
Karma Police -- Let’s take a drive, there’s no way that could end poorly.
Paranoid Android -- I hope this makes you want to buy a purple toque, and not a g-string pouch for your family jewels.
Let Down -- Live in 2016
Everything in Its Right Place/Idioteque -- Live in 2016
The National Anthem -- A fanmade video with a cool visualizer.
Pyramid Song -- If you told me Boneface had a hand in this video I would believe you.
Knives Out -- This acid trip will give you nightmares about the game of Operation.
The Amazing Sounds of Orgy -- This sounds like it is right off of Lullabies to Paralyze.
2 + 2 = 5 -- Disclaimer: there is no actual math involved.
I Will -- Live in Paris
Jigsaw Falling Into Place -- All helmet cams, all the time (all the time)
House of Cards -- Apparently this video was shot with one of those pin things that you press against your face.
Lotus Flower -- So. Many. Memes.
Burn the Witch -- A low flying panic attack.
Show Them Some Love
/radiohead
Previous Posts
Tool
Alice in Chains
King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard
Rage Against the Machine
Soundgarden
Run the Jewels
Royal Blood
Arctic Monkeys
Ty Segall
Eagles of Death Metal
Them Crooked Vultures
Led Zeppelin
Greta Van Fleet
Ten Commandos
Screaming Trees
Sound City Players
Iggy Pop
Mastodon
The Strokes
submitted by House_of_Suns to qotsa [link] [comments]


2020.09.11 00:04 CaptKutchiesTA The Kutchie's Key Lime Pie Mystery Part 1: Overview, Theories and Leads

The mystery of Captain Kutchie and his key lime pie has haunted the internet for over a decade now.It’s been extensively written on elsewhere, so I won’t spend long on the details I assume many already know, so check this link for some more in-depth info (https://www.reddit.com/UnresolvedMysteries/comments/9wo93c/other_an_indepth_look_at_kutchies_key_lime_pies/ )
The basis of the mystery though, is that since 2010, an individual or group has been writing cryptic, bizarrely written rants on various websites about a restaurant called Captain Kutchie’s Key West Cafe, usually focusing on either the key lime pies served at this restaurant, or the owner, Oswald “Kutchie” Paleaz. For a long time, it was unclear that Kutchie’s actually existed, but it was eventually discovered that the restaurant did exist, and was open from the 1970s until 2009, at the address 2227-2201 Asheville Hwy, Hendersonville, NC 2879. The messages about Kutchie’s have turned up in various places throughout the internet, but they usually share a common format. Here is one sample:
“I Tried The Captain Kutchie’s Key Lime Pies And Those PieGasams Healed All My Symptoms Within The First 4-Weeks! I highly Recommend Captain Kutchie’s Key Lime Pies For Anything That Ails You!….(“They’re Great”!!!.).. .. …Kobe Bryant May Be Retiring From Basket Ball But Captain Kutchie’s Is Still His Pie Of Choice!… …Can’t Get Enough Of That Key Lime Pie, Key Lime Pie, Key Lime Pie. Can’t Get Enough Of That Key Lime Pie Or I’ll Just Cry Until I Die, I Don’t Know Why I Just Love My Key Lime Pies!…. .\ .”
So, this is a typical example of what the posts look like, showing many of the common hallmarks: non-syntactic sentences, Capitalization Of Every Word, references to celebrities or politicians liking the pies and an odd radio-announcer like tone are some hallmarks of the writing style, though it can vary. It isn’t hard to see why, after finding these messages strewn across the internet like litter by the side of a freeway, people have gotten sucked into the investigation, and become suspicious of deeper meanings.
This 2-part longpost is going to be looking through the various writings of the mysterious poster over the years and the theories surrounding them, eventually leading up to my own personal quest to solve the mystery, and the findings I’ve made. I do not have a true wrap-up to this case, but I believe I have done the most in-depth research of anyone up until now, and I have discovered some hitherto unexplored leads. First, a look at the theories surrounding the case posited by other investigators over the years:
A Bot- This is a common theory due to the connection to a business, and the fact that the poster seems to respond to certain keywords (topics involving pie, sex, politics, and baby boomer pop culture). However, I think this one can be dismissed out of hand, the reason being that accounts connected to Kutchie’s have engaged and responded to people in a non-botlike way. More on that later. Beyond that, I can’t see any reason for someone to program such a bot, since there’s nothing to be gained from having a bot spend a decade posting nonsense about a defunct restaurant.
Oswald Pelaez himself- This is another one I’ve seen a few times, the assumption being that the posts are the Captain having a senior moment, or just fucking around in his old age. A visit to Pelaez’s Facebook page shows that he did indeed have a word-salad writing style, albeit not the exact same as the Kutchie's poster. However, it seems unlikely that this was the case, as a Redditor reported having contacted one of Pelaez’s sons, and finding that the Pelaez family appeared equally baffled.
An autistic or schizophrenic individual with a fixation on the restaurant: This suggestion derives from the unique writing style and monomaniacal interest of the poster. I have seen mental health professionals weighing in saying that the stream-of-conscious nature of the posts recalls their patients. I think people are drawn to this explanation because it puts something of a wholesome spin on the mystery- an individual with social/cognitive difficulties had a good experience at the restaurant while growing up in Asheville all those years ago, and now he wants to tell the internet about it in his one way. However, as again shown through communications with the poster, they are able to switch out of their “posting voice” and become more lucid, which may put this theory into doubt, or at least implies that the individual behind the posts is more high-functioning and calculating.
Coded messages or communications- This is a natural theory- the idea is that these posts are the modern equivalent of the Cold War number’s stations, broadcasting messages which can be read by the public, but are incomprehensible except to those privy to the info on how to decode it. The immediate problem with this theory is that the slow pace, repetitious nature, and semi-random web addresses of the postings would seem to make it hard to hide code in them. How would the recipients of the code even know where to look? However, there is also the possibility that it’s simply an individual screaming his coded messages into the void, to taunt people or conceal his intentions from all but a skilled codebreaker, rather like the Zodiac Killer or the Duclod Man. Why would this individual choose to hide his messages in the form of posts about a defunct restaurant? Who can say?
So, those are the major theories floating around out there regarding who the poster is. As we can see, a few of these theories can be dismissed out of hand, and one can potentially poke holes in all of them. Now that we’ve looked at the theories, it’s time for an overview of the posts themselves, as they have appeared over the past 10 years:
Foodio54- (http://foodio54.com/restaurant/South-Asheville-Arden-NC/c2e5c/Kutchies-Key-West-Kutcharitaville-Cafe) This restaurant review site hosts four separate reviews of Kutchie’s Key West Cafe. All four of these reviews are clearly written in the same style, and they were written over the course of several years. The oldest one here is by a user named VinnyGambini, after the character in My Cousin Vinny. Dating from December 2009, this may be the single oldest Kutchie’s post.
“Kutch Makes All Those Key Lime Pies From Real Ingredients, Including Real Key Lime Juice. "Anita" Kutchie's Lovely Wife Helps Him Now Making All Those Pies. She Also Runs The Front Too, As Well As The Office. Yea, Keep It All In The Family. Now That's How You Get Quality Control. "Pop", Kutchie's Dad Has Always Been There To Help From The Beginning. Kutchie's Mom Even Helped Out Until She Passed Away Several Years Ago. Threw The 80's Kutch and Anita Had Three Sons, Carlo, Santino and Joseph. Kutch Calls Them His Three Amigo's. All Three Sons Were Raised There In The Restaurant And Have Learned All Aspects Of The Business, From The Dish Tank, Mopping Floors, Cutting Meats, Serving Tables, Cooking And Tending Bar. Kutch Said That His First Road Sign Listed At The Bottom, "Family Restaurant". Kutch Said, "At That Time He Had No Idea That Someday His Whole Family Would Be The Ones Working There". Well I Guess, That's Life. Sometimes I Call Kutch and Ask Him How Are Things Going, He Says "Just Another Day In Paradise". Shit, I Can Tell That He Is Sick And Tired Of Doing The Same Old Thing Day-In And Day-Out. Kutch Would Never Admit That, He'll Probably Keep That Place Open To Train His Grand Kids The Business. Kutch Has Many People Calling, All The Time, Wanting Him To Start An On-Line Business To Sell His Key Lime Pies Country Wide. I Don't Know If He Can Bake That Many. He Seems Pretty Pushed As It Is. He Says That Maybe Someday He Will Throw Up Another Building And Put A Key Lime Pie Factory In It, And Start A Web-Site. May-Be He Will, May-Be He Wont, Who Knows. Just Don't Tell Him, That He Can't. “
Here, the poster refers to Oswald’s wife, Anita. He also accurately names Oswald’s three sons. I don’t know how many records about Oswald Pelaez were online in 2009, so I’m not sure whether the poster would have needed to know the family to have this information. The next oldest post is from 2012, and curiously, does not capitalize every word like most Kutchie’s posts. This poster signs their name as “Betty Joe Walker''. A Google search shows that there was one person with that name (there are a few other Betty Jo Walkers, but only one spelled J-o-e). Walker was a native of central North Carolina. And she died at the age of 67, one year before the post was made. This was the finding that made me start thinking of this mystery as something sinister. Why would a bot, or an individual simply sharing his happy memories, steal a dead person’s name? Two more Restaurant54 reviews of Kutchies’s date to 2013, and contain pretty standard content for the poster. One of them uses the name “Jake Carson'', which is used by this poster in other places as well.
Ozgold.com- Around 2012, the poster began writing posts claiming that Captain Kutchie was giving aways millions of dollars in prizes, and linking to a now defunct site called Ozgold.com. All of these posts can be found in a Pastebin here: https://pastebin.com/bT1z5ywT. He even links to Pelaez’s phone number in one of these. Oddly, he takes a negative tone towards Pelaez in some of these posts, writing in one “Please, Please, Please warn everyone about about ozsgold.com and Mr. OZ, That SOB has to be a crook or just plume loco. Maybe another Bernie Madoff, who the hell knows? It just ain't right.” Of course, this gold giveaway never existed either way as far as I can tell.
The copy-paste messages-
In 2013, the frequency of Kutchie’s posting really skyrocketed. IMDB, cooking sites, Fanfiction.net, Google Books reviews- nowhere was safe. Of course, the poster was mainly drawn in by particular key-topics: Pie, restaurants in genera, sex, politics, baby-boomer celebrities such as Johnny Carson. A few usernames were commonly employed for these posts: Roger Ramjet, Willie Jordan and Jake Carson. Most of these messages would be exact or near-exact copy pastes of one another. Some common topics of these posts included:
Key Lime Pies and Goody-goody Cheeseburgers- As far as can be gleaned from surviving ads, the restaurant prided itself on serving a variety of steaks and seafoods, but the key lime pies and burgers (which the poster always refers to as “goody-goody cheeseburgers”) seem to have been what made an impression to this person/bot/secret cabal. Occasionally, the poster will also reference Kutchie’s “prime ribs of beef with swamp water”. What does that mean- who knows?
Oswald’s wife, Anita Pelaez- generally refers to her as “lovely” or “hot”. "It just doesn't get any better than seeing her," as it appears.
The proximity of the restaurant to the Biltmore Estate- The Biltmore Estate was the home of George Vanderbilt II, and is by far the largest private residence ever built in America. It also happens to be located in Asheville. It seems as though the poster is trying to advertise the restaurant’s proximity to a major tourist attraction- heedless of the fact that the restaurant is closed.
Orgasms- Describing food as “better than sex” isn’t too weird, but our poster really likes to stretch out this saying. He refers to the food as giving him “piegasms” which he implies restored his sexual vitality. Here’s an excerpt of an example from the Google Books reviews of a book called “Incredible Orgasms”, by Marcelle Perks:
“.I Do Know First Hand That The Pelaez’s Famous Key Lime Pies Have The Ability To Turn Small Stream Squirters Into Major League Gushers Or Some Might Call Them “Niagara Falls”. Holly Molly, Let Those Good Times Flow, Baby! ….It’s No Wonder Everyone Believes That Kutchie Pelaez Is The Most Interesting Man In The World…..”Damn He Really Is” For Sure! …..That “Kutchie”, He Looks Marvelous Dahling!… ….”Hemingway”, Had Nothing On The “KutchMan”… ….Someone Overheard The “Kutchman” Say One Day That He Thought That He Was A Lesbian!… We Don’t Want To see Him Coming Out Of The Toilet With Just His Dick In His Hands”
Older Facebook Posts-
To my knowledge, at least three Facebook accounts have been linked to Kutchie's poster over the years. The oldest, operated from 2013-2016 is Jake Carson: https://www.facebook.com/jake.carson.98284/friends. The “Jake Carson” previously showed up as one of the reviewer names on Foodio54. The name bears resemblance to Johnny Carson, another obsession of the poster. This account had no friends, no photos or video uploaded, and never deviated from copy pasting the same few messages over and over. The Carson account was prolific in 2014, often posting 3-5 times/day. The frequency of posts eventually tapered, the last one being made in 2016. 2016 was also the year that the copy-pasted comments on various websites stopped appearing with regularity. Some people believe that the real Kutchie’s poster stopped at this point, and everything after 2016 has been trolls appropriating the role. As we will see, however, the post-2016 posts indicate an equally bizarre and committed writer, which makes it seem unlikely that it’s a different person.
The second Kutchie’s Facebook account appears in 2017. This is another personal account, which goes by the name Kutchie Pelaez. This is one of the main reasons some people think it isn’t operated by the same person- because the poster never previously claimed to be Captain Kutchie (though he did claim to have worked there in some posts). Unlike Jake Carson, Kutchie Pelaez doesn’t post copypasted messages. He does, however, have a variety of artists and musicians liked, including this band, The Ritards, with whom he has the following interaction: https://www.facebook.com/theritards/reviews/?ref=page_internal. What’s curious though, is that beyond this Facebook page, there is little indication that The Ritards actually exist. They have no music uploaded anywhere online, nor are there concert dates. Their posts do have a few likes though, most from people in the Eastern Pennsylvania area. When I messaged the Facebook page to ask what they knew about Captain Kutchie, my post was marked as “seen” almost immediately, even though the page has not been updated in two years. I received no response, however. While The Ritards seemed to be a dead-end, the Eastern PA music scene will prove to be important.
Also notable re: the Kutchie Pelaez Facebook page is the encounter Reddit user u/carinhabsburg had with the account, documented here: https://www.reddit.com/UnresolvedMysteries/comments/5c7g4m/what_the_captain_kutchie_of_the_key_lime_pies/. They messaged the account to ask who Kutchie was. He replied by sending a paragraph of text from a demo version of Silent Hill, which was in Swedish. While u/carinhapsburg was Swedish, they were adamant that there was no way Kutchie should have known that. Referencing a modern video game is certainly out of character for the boomer-persona the Kutchie’s poster had built up, so you can certainly see why some think the post-2016 poster is a different person. However, the vaguely sinister tone of this interaction is not exactly without precedent, given that the poster was already stealing a dead woman’s name in 2012.
Deviantart- The same year that the Kutchie Pelaez Facebook debuted, a Devientart with the same profile picture debuted- https://www.deviantart.com/captainkutchie. The bio of this account ascribes a variety of odd attributes to Captain Kutchie- His favorite gaming platform? “A sidewalk large enough for a heated round of hopscotch or marbles.”
His favourite books? “Epidemically overrated teen paperback novels. Ikea instruction manuals.”
His “Tools of the Trade?” “My fists. Spells and potions.”
The accounts gallery posts are now deleted, and I unfortunately did not take any screenshots. There were three paragraphs that they copypsted over and over- one about Anita Pelaez and Kutchie’s prime rib, one excerpt from a Longmont Potion Castle bit, and one Charles Manson quote. Longmont Potion Castle is an anonymous individual who has recorded their prank calls since the early 90s. Since anonymity and the adoption of absurd personas are LPC’s hallmarks, it’s not hard to see why the Kutchie’s poster chooses to quote them. The Manson quote, while tying in to the poster’s obsession with famous people of the 60s and 70s, adds another deeply sinister element to the mystery.
Patti Salmon-
In 2018, the poster begins writing about Captain Kutchie’s under the name Patti Salmon (a pun on salmon patties?) These posts are differentiated from the past ones by their explicit political anger. While politics were already noted as one of the poster’s obsessions, Patti Salmon goes on disparaging rants, only loosely tied back to the restaurant, against liberal political figures.
This is an excerpt from a comment under a blog post about the Kutchie’s mystery (also indicating that the poster is self-aware of the mystery community’s interest in them):
“That Rep. Jerry Nadler (D) NY, Rag Head llhan Omar (D) Minn, Alex Ocasio-Horetez (D) NY, Ayanna Lesbo Pressley (D) Mass.., Rashida Tlaib (D) Mich., Al Green (D) Tx., Pocahantas Vermont Tribe with Bernie Sanders, Nervous Nancy Cookville Calf., Rachel Madnow (MSNBC), Robert De Negro (NY), Shifty Schiff Cookvill Calf., El Chapo, Bozo O’ Rourke (Who Cares)., Maxine Impeach Waters Cookville Calf., Woopi Goldbrick (ABC)., Joy Blowhard (ABC)., Rainny Hostin (ABC)., Juan Williams (FOX NEWS)., Adoff Hilter (HELL)., Hell-They’re All really some kind of Commie’s ? Impeach Them NOW!!! Oh, I forgot one, The Rev. Al Not-So-Sharpton, very interesting butt Stupid! Let’s Send them all to the moon for the next 50 Years! What would Chef Captain Kutchie Pelaez Say? Well, He would probably say something like “No Soup For You!!!”. “Come Back 50 years”. Or something like for all those “Politicos” “Stay Away From Those Manholes” and he would say “Don’t Get None On Ya!”. Anyway, we sure-do still agree with all those “Kutcharitaville and Chef Captain Kutchie Pelaez Reports that everyone has been posting for the last 25 years or however long this internet thing has been going on. Captain Kutchie has been World Famous way longer than this stupid internet for damn sure. You can take that to the bank, Thats’ GOLD Jerry it’s GOLD! Or put it in your pipe and smoke it. He would also say, All of today’s Anti Trumpers are mad because, they were promised by The Dragon Lady HerSelf “Hillary Clinton” a leading Membership in Hillary’s 666 New World Order! What makes all these Racist, Commie Leftest Liberal Wannabee everything for nothing AssHoles and they’re Scum Sucking Pig, Fake News Chicken-Shit, Ass Licking Fake Reporters think that they can outsmart our “Lord Christ Jesus”? Hillary, your lord Satan was defeated way back on The Cross and yet, YOU, continue to deceive and recruit all those weak souls that you can fool too follow you back home straight too HELL!”
Note the interest in conspiracy theories here.
Newer Facebook Posts-
Finally, we come to the newest Facebook account, this one a page for a business rather than a personal account- Kutchie’s Key West Kutcharitaville Cafe (not linked here, gonna go ahead and say Do Not Interact). This page debuted in July 2020, just weeks before I fell down the Kutchie’s rabbithole and began this investigation. Unsurprisingly given its recency, it does not appear to have been discovered by anyone else in the mystery community.
The earliest posts from this page are simply shares of Jake Carson’s posts from several years prior. On July 12th, the Kutcharitaville page began posting longer messages, at a rate of 5+ every day. These posts are nonsensical jumbles of words that appear in other Kutchie’s posts, and appear to have been created by either a bot, or one of those story generators where you feed paragraphs in and it tries to rearrange them syntactically. Here’s a sample from a much longer post.
“BILTMORE HOUSE AND WE LOVELY ANITA PELAEZ IS THE PELAEZ IS THE WORLD THEY EVERYONE S KEY WEST FAME LOCATED NEAR THE BEST AND GRILL WHERE THE BILLED AS THE LOVELY COUPLE S KEY WEST FAME LOCATED NEAR THE MEL FISHER HE THOSE GOOD NEWS NOT A LESBIAN ANITA S BEST AND GRILL WHERE THE LOVELY COUPLE S BEST AND GRILL WHERE THE LOVELY COUPLE HOUSE AND THEY EVERYONE S SEX RATES BY KUTCHIE S BEST AND WE LOVELY COUPLE S SEX RATES BY NO LESS THAN HIS FATHER THEY EVERYONE S GOOD NEWS NOT A WIN WIN WIN FOR ANYTHING ON THE DOG ATE YOURS DICK IN THE PELAEZ OVER AND TREASURE MUCH MORE ANITA PELAEZ AND HER FAMOUS DEEP SEA UNDERWATER AND HER FAMOUS KEY WEST FAME MAY”
Interspersed with these posts are excerpts from North Carolinian newspapers that reference the restaurant, and photos of the exterior and interior of the abandoned building. What’s interesting is that the photos of the building don’t appear to be from anywhere on the internet. In other words, that means the poster must have actually gone to the building, and either broken in or been let in. This is the reason why I, as stated earlier, think that the post-2016 posts do come from the same individual as the older ones. The level of obsession indicated here is not that of a troll or a LARPer. It’s that of someone truly devoted to an inscrutable cause. Interestingly, one of these posts received a like from the Kutchie Pelaez account, indicating it was still active too in July 2020.
More recently, the account began posting coherent sentences that bear no relation to Captain Kutchie or key lime pies. In a post from July 28th, the poster copypastes the phrase “mail dropped to Rhode Island” 35 times, and below that “From Delaware.” Another post copies the phrase “My brother was eaten by wolves on the Connecticut turnpike,” which is a line from the Stephen King story “1408”.
On July 31st, the poster writes “Carrie Lam is not nice with China. She will end floating in a water tank”, copying this phrase dozens of times. This appears to be a macabre pun on the shared surnames of Carrie Lam, controversial mayor of Hong-Kong, and Elisa Lam, a woman who drowned in a water tank under circumstances that have made her story a fixture in the online unsolved-mysteries community. At the time of writing, the most recent post is from August 25th, and reads
“USE [master] Mexico. Mexico. Mexico. Soon we are in Mexico. (+14) and in we go. GO”
Screencaps of some posts, for posterity: https://imgur.com/gallery/R8ssLw6
This is the current status of the Kutchie’s poster. Dark, cryptic phrases, repeated on a Facebook page to 69 followers. Next, I’m going to be posting about the results of my personal investigation into the Kutchie’s mystery, featuring my interactions with this account, among others.
Edit
I have made a significant error in my post. The owner of the restaurant was Oswald Pelaez Jr, nor senior, and Anita was his wife, while Polly was his father's wife. So Captain Kutchie is still alive, I believe
submitted by CaptKutchiesTA to nonmurdermysteries [link] [comments]


2020.09.10 23:04 CaptKutchiesTA The Kutchie's Key Lime Pie Mystery Part 1: Overview, Theories and Leads

The mystery of Captain Kutchie and his key lime pie has haunted the internet for over a decade now.It’s been extensively written on elsewhere, so I won’t spend long on the details I assume many already know, so check this link for some more in-depth info (https://www.reddit.com/UnresolvedMysteries/comments/9wo93c/other_an_indepth_look_at_kutchies_key_lime_pies/ )
The basis of the mystery though, is that since 2010, an individual or group has been writing cryptic, bizarrely written rants on various websites about a restaurant called Captain Kutchie’s Key West Cafe, usually focusing on either the key lime pies served at this restaurant, or the owner, Oswald “Kutchie” Paleaz. For a long time, it was unclear that Kutchie’s actually existed, but it was eventually discovered that the restaurant did exist, and was open from the 1970s until 2009, at the address 2227-2201 Asheville Hwy, Hendersonville, NC 2879. The messages about Kutchie’s have turned up in various places throughout the internet, but they usually share a common format. Here is one sample:
“I Tried The Captain Kutchie’s Key Lime Pies And Those PieGasams Healed All My Symptoms Within The First 4-Weeks! I highly Recommend Captain Kutchie’s Key Lime Pies For Anything That Ails You!….(“They’re Great”!!!.).. .. …Kobe Bryant May Be Retiring From Basket Ball But Captain Kutchie’s Is Still His Pie Of Choice!… …Can’t Get Enough Of That Key Lime Pie, Key Lime Pie, Key Lime Pie. Can’t Get Enough Of That Key Lime Pie Or I’ll Just Cry Until I Die, I Don’t Know Why I Just Love My Key Lime Pies!…. .\ .”
So, this is a typical example of what the posts look like, showing many of the common hallmarks: non-syntactic sentences, Capitalization Of Every Word, references to celebrities or politicians liking the pies and an odd radio-announcer like tone are some hallmarks of the writing style, though it can vary. It isn’t hard to see why, after finding these messages strewn across the internet like litter by the side of a freeway, people have gotten sucked into the investigation, and become suspicious of deeper meanings.
This 2-part longpost is going to be looking through the various writings of the mysterious poster over the years and the theories surrounding them, eventually leading up to my own personal quest to solve the mystery, and the findings I’ve made. I do not have a true wrap-up to this case, but I believe I have done the most in-depth research of anyone up until now, and I have discovered some hitherto unexplored leads. First, a look at the theories surrounding the case posited by other investigators over the years:
A Bot- This is a common theory due to the connection to a business, and the fact that the poster seems to respond to certain keywords (topics involving pie, sex, politics, and baby boomer pop culture). However, I think this one can be dismissed out of hand, the reason being that accounts connected to Kutchie’s have engaged and responded to people in a non-botlike way. More on that later. Beyond that, I can’t see any reason for someone to program such a bot, since there’s nothing to be gained from having a bot spend a decade posting nonsense about a defunct restaurant.
Oswald Pelaez himself- This is another one I’ve seen a few times, the assumption being that the posts are the Captain having a senior moment, or just fucking around in his old age. A visit to Pelaez’s Facebook page shows that he did indeed have a word-salad writing style, albeit not the exact same as the Kutchie's poster. However, it seems unlikely that this was the case, as a Redditor reported having contacted one of Pelaez’s sons, and finding that the Pelaez family appeared equally baffled.
An autistic or schizophrenic individual with a fixation on the restaurant: This suggestion derives from the unique writing style and monomaniacal interest of the poster. I have seen mental health professionals weighing in saying that the stream-of-conscious nature of the posts recalls their patients. I think people are drawn to this explanation because it puts something of a wholesome spin on the mystery- an individual with social/cognitive difficulties had a good experience at the restaurant while growing up in Asheville all those years ago, and now he wants to tell the internet about it in his one way. However, as again shown through communications with the poster, they are able to switch out of their “posting voice” and become more lucid, which may put this theory into doubt, or at least implies that the individual behind the posts is more high-functioning and calculating.
Coded messages or communications- This is a natural theory- the idea is that these posts are the modern equivalent of the Cold War number’s stations, broadcasting messages which can be read by the public, but are incomprehensible except to those privy to the info on how to decode it. The immediate problem with this theory is that the slow pace, repetitious nature, and semi-random web addresses of the postings would seem to make it hard to hide code in them. How would the recipients of the code even know where to look? However, there is also the possibility that it’s simply an individual screaming his coded messages into the void, to taunt people or conceal his intentions from all but a skilled codebreaker, rather like the Zodiac Killer or the Duclod Man. Why would this individual choose to hide his messages in the form of posts about a defunct restaurant? Who can say?
So, those are the major theories floating around out there regarding who the poster is. As we can see, a few of these theories can be dismissed out of hand, and one can potentially poke holes in all of them. Now that we’ve looked at the theories, it’s time for an overview of the posts themselves, as they have appeared over the past 10 years:
Foodio54- (http://foodio54.com/restaurant/South-Asheville-Arden-NC/c2e5c/Kutchies-Key-West-Kutcharitaville-Cafe) This restaurant review site hosts four separate reviews of Kutchie’s Key West Cafe. All four of these reviews are clearly written in the same style, and they were written over the course of several years. The oldest one here is by a user named VinnyGambini, after the character in My Cousin Vinny. Dating from December 2009, this may be the single oldest Kutchie’s post.
“Kutch Makes All Those Key Lime Pies From Real Ingredients, Including Real Key Lime Juice. "Anita" Kutchie's Lovely Wife Helps Him Now Making All Those Pies. She Also Runs The Front Too, As Well As The Office. Yea, Keep It All In The Family. Now That's How You Get Quality Control. "Pop", Kutchie's Dad Has Always Been There To Help From The Beginning. Kutchie's Mom Even Helped Out Until She Passed Away Several Years Ago. Threw The 80's Kutch and Anita Had Three Sons, Carlo, Santino and Joseph. Kutch Calls Them His Three Amigo's. All Three Sons Were Raised There In The Restaurant And Have Learned All Aspects Of The Business, From The Dish Tank, Mopping Floors, Cutting Meats, Serving Tables, Cooking And Tending Bar. Kutch Said That His First Road Sign Listed At The Bottom, "Family Restaurant". Kutch Said, "At That Time He Had No Idea That Someday His Whole Family Would Be The Ones Working There". Well I Guess, That's Life. Sometimes I Call Kutch and Ask Him How Are Things Going, He Says "Just Another Day In Paradise". Shit, I Can Tell That He Is Sick And Tired Of Doing The Same Old Thing Day-In And Day-Out. Kutch Would Never Admit That, He'll Probably Keep That Place Open To Train His Grand Kids The Business. Kutch Has Many People Calling, All The Time, Wanting Him To Start An On-Line Business To Sell His Key Lime Pies Country Wide. I Don't Know If He Can Bake That Many. He Seems Pretty Pushed As It Is. He Says That Maybe Someday He Will Throw Up Another Building And Put A Key Lime Pie Factory In It, And Start A Web-Site. May-Be He Will, May-Be He Wont, Who Knows. Just Don't Tell Him, That He Can't. “
Here, the poster refers to Oswald’s wife, Anita. He also accurately names Oswald’s three sons. I don’t know how many records about Oswald Pelaez were online in 2009, so I’m not sure whether the poster would have needed to know the family to have this information. The next oldest post is from 2012, and curiously, does not capitalize every word like most Kutchie’s posts. This poster signs their name as “Betty Joe Walker''. A Google search shows that there was one person with that name (there are a few other Betty Jo Walkers, but only one spelled J-o-e). Walker was a native of central North Carolina. And she died at the age of 67, one year before the post was made. This was the finding that made me start thinking of this mystery as something sinister. Why would a bot, or an individual simply sharing his happy memories, steal a dead person’s name? Two more Restaurant54 reviews of Kutchies’s date to 2013, and contain pretty standard content for the poster. One of them uses the name “Jake Carson'', which is used by this poster in other places as well.
Ozgold.com- Around 2012, the poster began writing posts claiming that Captain Kutchie was giving aways millions of dollars in prizes, and linking to a now defunct site called Ozgold.com. All of these posts can be found in a Pastebin here: https://pastebin.com/bT1z5ywT. He even links to Pelaez’s phone number in one of these. Oddly, he takes a negative tone towards Pelaez in some of these posts, writing in one “Please, Please, Please warn everyone about about ozsgold.com and Mr. OZ, That SOB has to be a crook or just plume loco. Maybe another Bernie Madoff, who the hell knows? It just ain't right.” Of course, this gold giveaway never existed either way as far as I can tell.
The copy-paste messages-
In 2013, the frequency of Kutchie’s posting really skyrocketed. IMDB, cooking sites, Fanfiction.net, Google Books reviews- nowhere was safe. Of course, the poster was mainly drawn in by particular key-topics: Pie, restaurants in genera, sex, politics, baby-boomer celebrities such as Johnny Carson. A few usernames were commonly employed for these posts: Roger Ramjet, Willie Jordan and Jake Carson. Most of these messages would be exact or near-exact copy pastes of one another. Some common topics of these posts included:
Key Lime Pies and Goody-goody Cheeseburgers- As far as can be gleaned from surviving ads, the restaurant prided itself on serving a variety of steaks and seafoods, but the key lime pies and burgers (which the poster always refers to as “goody-goody cheeseburgers”) seem to have been what made an impression to this person/bot/secret cabal. Occasionally, the poster will also reference Kutchie’s “prime ribs of beef with swamp water”. What does that mean- who knows?
Oswald’s wife, Anita Pelaez- generally refers to her as “lovely” or “hot”. "It just doesn't get any better than seeing her," as it appears.
The proximity of the restaurant to the Biltmore Estate- The Biltmore Estate was the home of George Vanderbilt II, and is by far the largest private residence ever built in America. It also happens to be located in Asheville. It seems as though the poster is trying to advertise the restaurant’s proximity to a major tourist attraction- heedless of the fact that the restaurant is closed.
Orgasms- Describing food as “better than sex” isn’t too weird, but our poster really likes to stretch out this saying. He refers to the food as giving him “piegasms” which he implies restored his sexual vitality. Here’s an excerpt of an example from the Google Books reviews of a book called “Incredible Orgasms”, by Marcelle Perks:
“.I Do Know First Hand That The Pelaez’s Famous Key Lime Pies Have The Ability To Turn Small Stream Squirters Into Major League Gushers Or Some Might Call Them “Niagara Falls”. Holly Molly, Let Those Good Times Flow, Baby! ….It’s No Wonder Everyone Believes That Kutchie Pelaez Is The Most Interesting Man In The World…..”Damn He Really Is” For Sure! …..That “Kutchie”, He Looks Marvelous Dahling!… ….”Hemingway”, Had Nothing On The “KutchMan”… ….Someone Overheard The “Kutchman” Say One Day That He Thought That He Was A Lesbian!… We Don’t Want To see Him Coming Out Of The Toilet With Just His Dick In His Hands”
Older Facebook Posts-
To my knowledge, at least three Facebook accounts have been linked to Kutchie's poster over the years. The oldest, operated from 2013-2016 is Jake Carson: https://www.facebook.com/jake.carson.98284/friends. The “Jake Carson” previously showed up as one of the reviewer names on Foodio54. The name bears resemblance to Johnny Carson, another obsession of the poster. This account had no friends, no photos or video uploaded, and never deviated from copy pasting the same few messages over and over. The Carson account was prolific in 2014, often posting 3-5 times/day. The frequency of posts eventually tapered, the last one being made in 2016. 2016 was also the year that the copy-pasted comments on various websites stopped appearing with regularity. Some people believe that the real Kutchie’s poster stopped at this point, and everything after 2016 has been trolls appropriating the role. As we will see, however, the post-2016 posts indicate an equally bizarre and committed writer, which makes it seem unlikely that it’s a different person.
The second Kutchie’s Facebook account appears in 2017. This is another personal account, which goes by the name Kutchie Pelaez. This is one of the main reasons some people think it isn’t operated by the same person- because the poster never previously claimed to be Captain Kutchie (though he did claim to have worked there in some posts). Unlike Jake Carson, Kutchie Pelaez doesn’t post copypasted messages. He does, however, have a variety of artists and musicians liked, including this band, The Ritards, with whom he has the following interaction: https://www.facebook.com/theritards/reviews/?ref=page_internal. What’s curious though, is that beyond this Facebook page, there is little indication that The Ritards actually exist. They have no music uploaded anywhere online, nor are there concert dates. Their posts do have a few likes though, most from people in the Eastern Pennsylvania area. When I messaged the Facebook page to ask what they knew about Captain Kutchie, my post was marked as “seen” almost immediately, even though the page has not been updated in two years. I received no response, however. While The Ritards seemed to be a dead-end, the Eastern PA music scene will prove to be important.
Also notable re: the Kutchie Pelaez Facebook page is the encounter Reddit user u/carinhabsburg had with the account, documented here: https://www.reddit.com/UnresolvedMysteries/comments/5c7g4m/what_the_captain_kutchie_of_the_key_lime_pies/. They messaged the account to ask who Kutchie was. He replied by sending a paragraph of text from a demo version of Silent Hill, which was in Swedish. While u/carinhapsburg was Swedish, they were adamant that there was no way Kutchie should have known that. Referencing a modern video game is certainly out of character for the boomer-persona the Kutchie’s poster had built up, so you can certainly see why some think the post-2016 poster is a different person. However, the vaguely sinister tone of this interaction is not exactly without precedent, given that the poster was already stealing a dead woman’s name in 2012.
Deviantart- The same year that the Kutchie Pelaez Facebook debuted, a Devientart with the same profile picture debuted- https://www.deviantart.com/captainkutchie. The bio of this account ascribes a variety of odd attributes to Captain Kutchie- His favorite gaming platform? “A sidewalk large enough for a heated round of hopscotch or marbles.”
His favourite books? “Epidemically overrated teen paperback novels. Ikea instruction manuals.”
His “Tools of the Trade?” “My fists. Spells and potions.”
The accounts gallery posts are now deleted, and I unfortunately did not take any screenshots. There were three paragraphs that they copypsted over and over- one about Anita Pelaez and Kutchie’s prime rib, one excerpt from a Longmont Potion Castle bit, and one Charles Manson quote. Longmont Potion Castle is an anonymous individual who has recorded their prank calls since the early 90s. Since anonymity and the adoption of absurd personas are LPC’s hallmarks, it’s not hard to see why the Kutchie’s poster chooses to quote them. The Manson quote, while tying in to the poster’s obsession with famous people of the 60s and 70s, adds another deeply sinister element to the mystery.
Patti Salmon-
In 2018, the poster begins writing about Captain Kutchie’s under the name Patti Salmon (a pun on salmon patties?) These posts are differentiated from the past ones by their explicit political anger. While politics were already noted as one of the poster’s obsessions, Patti Salmon goes on disparaging rants, only loosely tied back to the restaurant, against liberal political figures.
This is an excerpt from a comment under a blog post about the Kutchie’s mystery (also indicating that the poster is self-aware of the mystery community’s interest in them):
“That Rep. Jerry Nadler (D) NY, Rag Head llhan Omar (D) Minn, Alex Ocasio-Horetez (D) NY, Ayanna Lesbo Pressley (D) Mass.., Rashida Tlaib (D) Mich., Al Green (D) Tx., Pocahantas Vermont Tribe with Bernie Sanders, Nervous Nancy Cookville Calf., Rachel Madnow (MSNBC), Robert De Negro (NY), Shifty Schiff Cookvill Calf., El Chapo, Bozo O’ Rourke (Who Cares)., Maxine Impeach Waters Cookville Calf., Woopi Goldbrick (ABC)., Joy Blowhard (ABC)., Rainny Hostin (ABC)., Juan Williams (FOX NEWS)., Adoff Hilter (HELL)., Hell-They’re All really some kind of Commie’s ? Impeach Them NOW!!! Oh, I forgot one, The Rev. Al Not-So-Sharpton, very interesting butt Stupid! Let’s Send them all to the moon for the next 50 Years! What would Chef Captain Kutchie Pelaez Say? Well, He would probably say something like “No Soup For You!!!”. “Come Back 50 years”. Or something like for all those “Politicos” “Stay Away From Those Manholes” and he would say “Don’t Get None On Ya!”. Anyway, we sure-do still agree with all those “Kutcharitaville and Chef Captain Kutchie Pelaez Reports that everyone has been posting for the last 25 years or however long this internet thing has been going on. Captain Kutchie has been World Famous way longer than this stupid internet for damn sure. You can take that to the bank, Thats’ GOLD Jerry it’s GOLD! Or put it in your pipe and smoke it. He would also say, All of today’s Anti Trumpers are mad because, they were promised by The Dragon Lady HerSelf “Hillary Clinton” a leading Membership in Hillary’s 666 New World Order! What makes all these Racist, Commie Leftest Liberal Wannabee everything for nothing AssHoles and they’re Scum Sucking Pig, Fake News Chicken-Shit, Ass Licking Fake Reporters think that they can outsmart our “Lord Christ Jesus”? Hillary, your lord Satan was defeated way back on The Cross and yet, YOU, continue to deceive and recruit all those weak souls that you can fool too follow you back home straight too HELL!”
Note the interest in conspiracy theories here.
Newer Facebook Posts-
Finally, we come to the newest Facebook account, this one a page for a business rather than a personal account- Kutchie’s Key West Kutcharitaville Cafe (not linked here, gonna go ahead and say Do Not Interact). This page debuted in July 2020, just weeks before I fell down the Kutchie’s rabbithole and began this investigation. Unsurprisingly given its recency, it does not appear to have been discovered by anyone else in the mystery community.
The earliest posts from this page are simply shares of Jake Carson’s posts from several years prior. On July 12th, the Kutcharitaville page began posting longer messages, at a rate of 5+ every day. These posts are nonsensical jumbles of words that appear in other Kutchie’s posts, and appear to have been created by either a bot, or one of those story generators where you feed paragraphs in and it tries to rearrange them syntactically. Here’s a sample from a much longer post.
“BILTMORE HOUSE AND WE LOVELY ANITA PELAEZ IS THE PELAEZ IS THE WORLD THEY EVERYONE S KEY WEST FAME LOCATED NEAR THE BEST AND GRILL WHERE THE BILLED AS THE LOVELY COUPLE S KEY WEST FAME LOCATED NEAR THE MEL FISHER HE THOSE GOOD NEWS NOT A LESBIAN ANITA S BEST AND GRILL WHERE THE LOVELY COUPLE S BEST AND GRILL WHERE THE LOVELY COUPLE HOUSE AND THEY EVERYONE S SEX RATES BY KUTCHIE S BEST AND WE LOVELY COUPLE S SEX RATES BY NO LESS THAN HIS FATHER THEY EVERYONE S GOOD NEWS NOT A WIN WIN WIN FOR ANYTHING ON THE DOG ATE YOURS DICK IN THE PELAEZ OVER AND TREASURE MUCH MORE ANITA PELAEZ AND HER FAMOUS DEEP SEA UNDERWATER AND HER FAMOUS KEY WEST FAME MAY”
Interspersed with these posts are excerpts from North Carolinian newspapers that reference the restaurant, and photos of the exterior and interior of the abandoned building. What’s interesting is that the photos of the building don’t appear to be from anywhere on the internet. In other words, that means the poster must have actually gone to the building, and either broken in or been let in. This is the reason why I, as stated earlier, think that the post-2016 posts do come from the same individual as the older ones. The level of obsession indicated here is not that of a troll or a LARPer. It’s that of someone truly devoted to an inscrutable cause. Interestingly, one of these posts received a like from the Kutchie Pelaez account, indicating it was still active too in July 2020.
More recently, the account began posting coherent sentences that bear no relation to Captain Kutchie or key lime pies. In a post from July 28th, the poster copypastes the phrase “mail dropped to Rhode Island” 35 times, and below that “From Delaware.” Another post copies the phrase “My brother was eaten by wolves on the Connecticut turnpike,” which is a line from the Stephen King story “1408”.
On July 31st, the poster writes “Carrie Lam is not nice with China. She will end floating in a water tank”, copying this phrase dozens of times. This appears to be a macabre pun on the shared surnames of Carrie Lam, controversial mayor of Hong-Kong, and Elisa Lam, a woman who drowned in a water tank under circumstances that have made her story a fixture in the online unsolved-mysteries community. At the time of writing, the most recent post is from August 25th, and reads
“USE [master] Mexico. Mexico. Mexico. Soon we are in Mexico. (+14) and in we go. GO”
Screencaps of some posts, for posterity: https://imgur.com/gallery/R8ssLw6
This is the current status of the Kutchie’s poster. Dark, cryptic phrases, repeated on a Facebook page to 69 followers. Next, I’m going to be posting about the results of my personal investigation into the Kutchie’s mystery, featuring my interactions with this account, among others.
Edit
I have made a significant error in my post. The owner of the restaurant was Oswald Pelaez Jr, nor senior, and Anita was his wife, while Polly was his father's wife. So Captain Kutchie is still alive, I believe
submitted by CaptKutchiesTA to UnresolvedMysteries [link] [comments]


2020.09.08 02:30 Blazinter [Gunpla/Gundam plastic models] "Premium Bandai" and why it is the most hated thing in the community worldwide.

TL;DR: Some decisions from Bandai related to model kits of robots hardly makes any sense, affecting even their own possible profits. Annoys the heck out of literal millions of people accross the earth.
Warning: I apologize in advance if some of my writting feels weird. I blame disgraphia and english not being my native language.
I also apologize if this feels more like a quarrel that should go for the weekly post, and the possibility of this matter having been posted already in this sub. I tried to look for it, but I haven't found anything (in fact, haven't found anything Gunpla-related).
I felt inspired to write about this topic once I've noticed the post about the recent bullpoo of a specific model supplies brand, and also the matter with a Jurassic Park toy.
Fortunately the very few instances of drama within this hobby has never got to be any big of a deal. If anything, the collaterals of the circlejerks within the Gundam fandom about "this show bad. I haven't watched it but people says is bad, so I'll agree it is bad" that they suffer so often in our occidental side. (Btw, not everyone onto Gundam is onto Gunpla, neither viceversa. Some people just dig the shows, some people just digs the cool robots.) But I'm digressing. There's just one matter that affects everyone in the hobby, that is a constant to this day: "P-Bandai."
But before I actually get onto it, I'd like to give some more context within this hobby in general, to make you able to understand better why the fuss is, well, such a fuss:

Some keys as to why Gunpla got to be so prominent

Gunpla, short for "gundam plastic model kits" has been going on short after the very release of the first show of the meta-franchise, Mobile Suit Gundam. The show at first wasn't very successful as even for the time it got released (april 1979) its animation quality already felt quite dated even back then. It wasn't until Katsumi Kawaguchi, more known as "Meijin Kawaguchi", felt like building entirely from scratch his own Gundam model (not having existed any official kit as of yet). The model hobby magazine "Hobby Japan" coincidentally was looking for someone that could achieve such feat; contacted Kawaguchi to commission him to make a model of a "Zaku II" (the main mass-produced grunt unit of the antagonist faction of the show).
This ordeal and the great success of the magazines reporting about those two builds got the attention of Sunrise, the animation studio of the show (which also belongs to Bandai). Hiring Kawaguchi pretty much on the spot as advisor (today he's the head of marketing of all related to Gunpla, by quite the merit at that) and trying their luck in creating the first gunpla kits ever; something so successful that it saved the show entirely, starting the snowball effect that would lead to how the franchise is such a phenomenon today, as same as the other phenomenon of the model kits themselves.
There's various merits as to how Bandai got to be so successful with their model kits. Namely, contrary as most of their competence, they produced the molds by themselves, and produced the kits by themselves, and not a random 3rd company somewhere else like likely China. This got them to the habit of keeping the molds of their kits, and never discarding them. So again, contrary to most of their competence, they reprinted their kits very often. No matter how old they were. This principle stays to this very day, in which the very only model kits they've ever officially discontinued were because of them being less-successful recolors of other similar kits, or the so far unique case of one of the respective molds being broken. In fact: today you could buy a freshly "printed" kit of a model that could perfectly been originally produced 45 years ago!
The production of the physical molds of a model kit is the expensiest and most labourious part on the whole development of a model kit by absolute far.
This last bit, and the fact that one of the constants of these models' catalogue is how they're constantly pseudo-perma-available almost any time, are some of the most important bits to take in mind in this whole matter.

"Alright but tell us what the heck is Premium Bandai"

Premium Bandai, more commonly shortened as "P-Bandai", is an exclusively online shop in which Bandai sells predominantly preorders of articles of theirs which, for one reason or another, they've have decided to make limited. Premium if you will. This includes some specific gunpla kits as well.
In principle, their intent with going out of their own norm about the availability of some of their kits was because there's specific cases they thought there'd be a bit of demand, but not quite enough to justify a retail release, like a specific Suit with a model kit already existing but with the color scheme representing a different faction, or the personal colors of an ace pilot, as example. This way they could hype up these releases which under normal circumstances would have likely sold less, and even become "dead stock" in the shelves of some shops, which apparently is sort of a problem within Japan.
Now, in Japan, interestingly, one of the things that people loves the most, is the experience of adventure of going to a physical store, and see all of those piles of literal hundreds of different model kits. Either trying to find the specific one they're looking for, or trying to decide for one among all of them, are like adventures all by themselves.
So as starters, most of the Japanese people that feels that way and values it as a tradition, already suffer a grudge towards having to get a specific kit of their desire by the "lame and soul-less" process as is preordering it and getting it delivered to their homes. But in the end of the day was alright because those recolors mostly only appealed to collectors rather than hardcore modelers. People still was able to take the retail color version of the respective kit, and paint it to those other specific colors, or even their own unique ones of their please.
Buuuuuuut this got worse when the exclusivities crossed the boundaries beyond just recolors. They'd release kits which while based in suits that already got kit'd, would have exclusive weapons, or aesthetic pieces. Now, you MUST order from these limited releases, hardly ever reprinted (if ever) if you want those pieces (That or being among the biggest pros of the hobby and make them by yourself, which isn't precisely an easy task).
Now, we know why Japan has a grudge againts P-Bandai. But what about the entire rest of the world?
You see, P-Bandai.jp only delivers within Japan, and Japan alone. (Eventually China and Singapore got their sites as well, but they're minor compared to the main one. North America just months ago got their own too, but we'll get onto that later)
If you were an occidental "gunpla'er", your usual course of action was ordering your "plastic crack" from any regular japan-based online shop that shipped worldwide, or pay overpriced within your local alternatives. If you weren't living in japan, and there was an exclusivity you wanted, you had to wait for resellers to get hold of it. You're paying extra for rarity, plus the inflation for the benefit for the reseller. A model kit which original price could have been 20$, now hardly ever would be under 45$. And if it was printed long ago, it'd be further expensier.
The whole fandom feels kind of entitled to their kits being cheap, because Bandai sells them for absurdly cheap. They sell the objectively best plastic model kits on earth at the price of cheap toys, because of the bulk. And they make mad cash still. In fact, they're making such money that is making the Gundam franchise grossing more than One Piece and almost as much as Dragon Ball, despite Gundam suffering still to this day the status of 'niche' outside most of the world outside Asia.
But this is only the beginning:

100% entirely new models being premium

May 2014, "Mobile Suit Gundam Side Story: Missing Link" gets released, a game for the Playstation 3 console. This game also had a collector edition with a goodie that caught everyone by surprise: a whole model kit based in the most prominent mecha of one of the many stories within the game, the Pale Rider. This model kit wasn't based in any other previously made one. It wasn't a slight re-do of an existing one nor way less a mere recolor. This already got the fandom under the alarms, but ultimately, people didn't mind it much back then.
A year later tho... It would come back, for good and for worse. It would come back as a P-Bandai exclusive. Not only that, but with new unique weaponry as well.
People loves this specific design still to this day, a lot. People can't grasp over their minds still to this day why Bandai is potentially limiting their possible profits on al already beloved design, specially when its respective pieces are from a brand new mold (you know, the expensiest part of the development of a model kit, effort and investment you'd like to profit from as much as possible).
Through all these years, Bandai has reprinted this kit various times. But unlike other regular kits, which you could see being reprinted after 1-4 months (heck, sometimes even twice within the same month), the Pale Rider has only seen an amount of reprints during these years that can be counted with the fingers of one of your hands.
This would set precedent for them to, still within a logic that no one has grasped yet, do the same for other future kits that despite having their own respective unique molds, would be limited as well. In fact, those recolors that were the original reason for this gig to be, hardly ever gets to happen anymore.
Japan felt gradually more annoyed by this ordeal, but hey, they can still buy them by themselves with no problem beyond the boring experience of not going to a shop physically, something occident can't even do themselves. This would provoke the entirety of the occidental fanbase feel quite insulted. They've acquired the general feeling that Bandai explicitly doesn't want their money, because making a kit a P-Bandai exclusive, instantly means they cannot acquire it in an official way. Wound rubbed further in when they're kits quite unique and cool by themselves.
This would become the norm for a handful of years, to everyone's disgrace.
But oh boy it got *worse.

Woundwort, "Half Life 3 of Gunpla", and how to easily anger people across the entire earth

The Gundam franchise doesn't only consist of animated stuff, there's written media too.
There's a specific serialized story that eventually would get novelized, "Advance of Zeta", which got quite the praise due to the remarkably unique and generally loved aesthetic of their mechanical designs, unique within the entirety of the franchise.
The most noteworthy Mobile Suit of said story that people loved the most, was the TR-6 Woundwort. Since it got to be a thing, it eventually became the suit of the whole franchise that was desired the most to be represented in kit format. This snowballing from back to the year 2002.
Bandai sporadically made merchandise of this suit, but never a kit. "Is it too complex?" "Is the copyright of Advance of Zeta different because of it being published by a specific magazine?" We've never got any answer. Despite this going on for more than decade and half, the Woundwort would be quite prone to lead on polls of the Gundam they want to see the most either animated or most predominantly, in kit format.
Due to how long that ordeal has been going on, it was just plainly assumed that it'd never happen, while the wishes still were as alive as ever, if not gradually higher. Reaching meme status even. People made their own unnofficial resin model kits of this particular gundam, even a chinese company made their own ilegal plastic model kit of the Woundwort.
Then one mysterious day, inside the Gundam Base (that place with the real life-sized Gundam being exposed), to everyone's heartstroke-inducing levels of surprise, a prototype of a Woundwort model kit got shown!
The entire fanbase was shaken. It finally happened! And with quite the joy, as they didn't assume this experience would be any tainted.
But... it did get tainted.
They've made a brand new bunch of molds for their peak most asked kit, by absolute far. This felt even moreso of a back-stab because, when Bandai shows a prototype announcing a new model kit, they tell if it is a P-Bandai release or not right away, something which they did NOT do when revealing the prototype of this Woundwort model kit (notice the lack of the P-Bandai tag in that white paper describing the article. You can see an example here on the reveal of this other P-Bandai model kit, revealed almost at the same time.
Imagine how gamers would feel if Half Life 3 finally happened, but only with few copies, available just for sale in a single country, with no shipping option outside whatsoever, being forced to pay the inflation from the modellers which were VERY well aware of how much desired this kit was.
Everyone in the hobby, period (excluding some rich people, perhaps), was noticeably pissed off by this nonsensical decision. Even Japan, which they themselves were the ones able to order them without issue, was royally pissed off. Some people did even bother to calculate how much potential profit Bandai are not getting by this decision.
Short time before the Woundwort happened, and specially after it happened, Bandai kept making more and more unique models as premium, without logic to be found yet, and to everyone's annoyance.

Light inside the tunnel?

There is an american company, Bluefin, which these last years has been managing to be Bandai's main associate at the business of distributing stuff within north america, including Gunpla.
They've been aware for the longest time that bringing P-Bandai kits to america would be a great gig, but it took quite a while for Bandai to bother themselves to allow that, and when they did, they did it with the stuff that was legitimately leftover stock of specific kits they knew right away that wouldn't sell well even within Japan.
Fortunately as years passed, Bandai has been realising about how the potential for the occidental market hasn't even tapped its proper potential, and began to purposely aim to hit more this market outside Asia. They even have started to build a second gunpla factory to boost their production of model kits x2. (There's a lot of reasons as to how Gunpla got to such global blooming "boom" and how it is becoming gradually more popular, but that's another long story, unfitting of this sub.)
So to surprise of everyone, with collaboration of Bluefin, America got its own website for P-Bandai products.
They slowly got to tackle preorders of every new P-Bandai model kit and re-release which has been happening simultaneously as Japan's. Sadly due to the piss-poor timing of certain historical event we all are suffering related to a pandemic, people didn't have much experience with them yet to say how good all is going so far. Covid striked the earth shortly after the website was announced, sabotaging the agility of the processing of the orders and how "early" they would be shipped.
These still has a high price in that site, but at least is finally less than what you'd require to pay to resellers. So some american people remains annoyed, while some others are overjoyed.
Meanwhile... If you are not in the USA, Japan, China, nor Singapore, you're still fricked.
People still has the perception that USA = all of occident. Europe specially, hasn't seen much sight of official support nor providers to this market yet,(only a random lame italian company which everyone hates) while USA has been pretty much working hard from the ground-up to get this to happen.
So, between the negatives of P-Bandai itself, and the fact that more than half of the world still has to overpay for these, this got to be, even if pretty much the only one of this hobby, a drama filled with rage, sadness, frustration, and even motivation for people to leave the whole hobby altogether, affecting millions of people all around the whole globe.
Possible questions:
Some "mainstream" model kits such as tanks or planes costs the average price of a P-Bandai model kit listed on ebay. Is people really whining that much?
Ye. You see, Bandai's model kits are pre-colored, articulated, a nice bunch of the times with perfect part separation with minimal need for masking if you get to paint them, and they don't require any glue whatsoever unless you get some of the very first ones from the '80s. Most people that buys gunpla aren't actual proper "modelers". They build them right out of the box and collect them. They feel like articulated figures right away. Between the price and quality, the whole fandom not only tends to feel like anything that is expensier than what they're already used to pay is, well, expensive, but also does even feel like "mainstream" model kits are lame.
When I click the japanese site for P-Bandai, it tells me that they have international shipping. Why the fuss then?
Because is a mislead that borders the blatant lie. They redirect you either other of their subsidiaries from other countries (list that is extremely limited as told by now), or to other websites that offers proxy-services to buy stuff from japan for you. These proxy sites buys the stuff from japan for you (not only P-Bandai, but anything else from Japan, like Yahoo Auctions, or Amazon.jp). You gotta pay them the shipping from the respective site to their warehouse, and then the second shipping from their warehouse to your house, and of course the extra margin for them to profit from. The difference in base price makes them no different than purchasing from resellers at all.
Hope my writting didn't bore you or made you bleed out of your eyes, and you found this interesting.
Wouldn't be weirded that between my disgraphia and that this took me way much longer to write than anticipated, going down to the wee hours of the night; got this bunch of text to have typos or words missing or something >.>
At least I can fix that with effort (hopefully), contrary as my whims for specific plastic robots without overpaying!
[Canned laughter]
submitted by Blazinter to HobbyDrama [link] [comments]


2020.09.06 21:27 llaverna Weekly Round-Up: August 31st - September 6th

Weekly Round-Up: August 31st - September 6th
/bangtan Weekly Round-Up
Previous thread: August 24th - August 30th
This round-up is for everything that happened in the /bangtan realm within the past week, compiled for your convenience! If you have feedback, please leave a comment or send me a PM.
The latest weekly round-up is linked on the sidebar of the subreddit. The link to the archive of past round-up posts can always be found in the wiki index.

New Releases

Date Link Thread
200901 [Audio] BTS x Hyundai - IONIQ: I'm on it Thread
200902 [MV] BTS x Hyundai - IONIQ: I'm on it Official MV Thread

Megathreads

Date Thread
200830 BTS @ 2020 MTV Video Music Awards
200901 Happy Jungkook day! [Birthday Compilation thread] - 2020
200831 'DYNAMITE' debuts at #1 on Billboard Hot 100 SNS Mentions and English Press Megathread

News & Information

Date Thread
200831 BTS to perform at the Lotte Duty Free Family Concert on September 27, 2020 @ 5 PM KST
200831 Application for Lotte Duty Free Online Concert
200831 'Dynamite' debuts at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100
200902 Dynamite Promotion Schedule - September
200902 [Notice] BREAK THE SILENCE: THE MOVIE Korean Premiere Rescheduling
200902 BTS won the Artist Award at the 47th Korean Broadcasting Awards, video acceptance speech to be delivered during ceremony aired on MBC on September 10
200902 Big Hit says it has filed paperwork for its planned IPO on the nation’s benchmark bourse KOSPI. They plan to make a stock debut in October.
200903 New Seoul Tourism Promotion video on Sep 11, with teasers from Sep 4-11
200903 BTS will be performing 'Dynamite' on NTV's The Music Day on 9/12 (Sat).
200903 Bighit Responds To Report Of Acquiring Zico’s Agency KOZ Entertainment
200903 ARMY Bomb Ver.3 and 'Map of the Soul Special Edition' can now connect to "Make It Right" (Vertical ver.) music video on Weverse
200904 Bang PD had donated some of his own shares to the BTS members, and in turn, the members further bought additional stocks themselves
200904 MV Screening Event 🎥 Enjoy the Dynamite MV in theaters before the movie starts!

Merchandise news

Date Thread
200831 BTS World Tour 'Love Yourself: Speak Yourself in London' DVD and Blu-ray Details
200902 [Re-Stocked] BTS Global Store: Limited Edition 7" Vinyl & Cassette
200904 BTS 'Love Yourself: Speak Yourself' London DVD and Blu-ray are now available to preorder on Weverse Shop
200906 "Dynamite" Celebration Merchandise will be available on Weverse Shop from September 7, 11AM KST

Music show wins

Date Thread
200902 BTS's "Dynamite" takes 1st place on today's Show Champion (3rd win)
200904 BTS have taken their fourth win for "Dynamite" on today's KBS Music Bank
200905 BTS have taken their fifth win for "Dynamite" on today's MBC Show! Music Core
200906 BTS have taken their sixth win for "Dynamite" on today's SBS Inkigayo

Expired news

Date Thread
200831 BTS x Hyundai "IONIQ: I'm on it" will be released on Aug. 31 @ 7PM KST and MV to be released on Sep. 2 @ 11AM KST
200901 BTS will be holding a media day tomorrow morning online in response to their #BTS1onHot100
200902 GRAMMYs: BTS 'Press Play At Home' Premiering Sept 3 @ 6pm PST

Appearances

Date Link Thread
200830 BTS @ 2020 MTV Video Music Awards
200903 Press Play: BTS – “Dynamite” (Live) Thread

Official Media

Type Date Link Thread
Bomb 200906 [BANGTAN BOMB] 'Dynamite' Stage CAM (BTS focus) @ 2020 MTV VMAs Thread
Dance 200902 [CHOREOGRAPHY] BTS (방탄소년단) ‘Dynamite’ Dance Practice‬ Thread
In the SOOP 200901 [Behind] In the SOOP BTS ver. EP.2 Free Time: Behind-the-scenes Thread
In the SOOP 200903 In the SOOP BTS ver. EP.3 Memories of a Rainy Day Thread
In the SOOP 200903 [In the SOOP BTS ver.] Official Clip - Ep.4 Thread
Live 200901 BTS Vlive: 빌보드 1위 아미 모여라 Thread
Smeraldo 200903 Smeraldo Blog Update 11 Thread
Teaser 200831 [PREVIEW] BTS (방탄소년단) 'LOVE YOURSELF : SPEAK YOURSELF’ LONDON DVD SPOT Thread
Teaser 200903 BTS (방탄소년단) 'BREAK THE SILENCE: THE MOVIE' Official Trailer 2 (60'') Thread
Teaser 200905 Official Poster 2 Thread
Video 200902 BTS (방탄소년단) 'Dynamite' ONLINE GLOBAL MEDIA DAY (+ENG) Thread
Video 200904 BTS (방탄소년단) Sing 'Dynamite' with me (feat. ARMY) Thread
Other 200831 Learn! KOREAN with BTS [EP.26] I Know, I Don't Know Thread

BTS Universe Story

Date Link Thread
200831 BTS Universe Story: NamJoon sits down in a corner and takes out a photo. It must be sentimental, because he gets lost in thought staring at it... Thread
200901 BTS Universe Story Thread
200903 BTS Universe Story: HoSeok keeps glancing at the door like he's waiting for someone. Will it be them this time? Thread
200904 BTS Universe Story: A video message arrives for JiMin just as he finally gets some time to himself. It's a familiar face and voice... Thread
200906 BTS Universe Story: The seven detectives are assembled! What case has brought them together like this? ... Pre-Register Now Thread

Official SNS

Date SNS Link Thread
200831 Instagram BTS Official Instagram Story Thread
200831 Twitter Hobi Thread
200831 Twitter SUGA Thread
200831 Twitter Today’s Bangtan Thread
200831 Instagram BTS Instagram Stories - VMA D-Day Thread
200901 Weverse Namjoon Thread
200901 Weverse Seokjin Thread
200901 Weverse Compilation
200901 Twitter BigHit Entertainment Thread
200901 Twitter BTS Official Thread
200901 Twitter Jimin Thread
200901 Twitter BTS Members Twitter Compilation Dynamite Debut at #1 on Billboard Hot 100
200901 Twitter j-hope Thread
200901 Twitter Bangtan Thread
200901 Twitter BTS' reply to President Moon Thread
200901 Twitter Namjoon Thread
200901 Twitter BTS is now mutuals with Jonas Brothers and MC Hammer on Twitter Thread
200901 TikTok j-hope Thread
200901 Instagram BTS Official Instagram Story Thread
200901 Twitter Taehyung Thread
200902 Weverse Jungkook Thread
200902 Twitter Bangtan Thread
200902 Twitter BTS Official Thread
200903 Instagram BTS Official Instagram Story Thread
200903 Twitter Jungkook Thread
200904 Twitter SUGA Thread
200904 Twitter SUGA Thread
200904 Instagram BTS Official Instagram Story Thread
200905 Twitter Seokjin Thread

BTS Interviews

  • Comprehensive list of Dynamite interviews HERE
Date Link Thread
200831 Billboard: BTS Talks Partnering With Hyundai For New Single 'Ioniq: I’m On It': 'It Was a Refreshing Experience' Thread
200831 IONIQ Interview with BTS
200902 On Demand Entertainment. BTS: "It's A Dream Come True!" Thread
200903 Billboard: BTS React To Their First Hot 100 No. 1 Hit ‘Dynamite’ Thread
200903 AP News: BTS on gaining respect in the US: ‘We definitely feel that’ Thread
200903 BTS Discuss 'Dynamite" on The Bert Show (Video) Thread
200904 Rolling Stone India: [Exclusive] BTS Reflect on the Massive Success of 'Dynamite' in India Thread
200906 AskAnythingChat: BTS' J-HOPE DANCES Just Like Dynamite Thread

CF & Partnerships

Date Thread
200831 Hot Topic Exclusive "Fake Love" hoodie and t-shirt now available for presale.
200831 FILA Korea x BTS - RM #3
200831 IONIQxBTS - IONIQ: I’m On it (Lyric video)
200831 IONIQxBTS: I'm On It
200831 Samsung Mobile
200901 FILA Korea x BTS - Jung Kook #3
200901 BTS x Bodyfriend - #8 How to Convey Your Heart
200901 BTS 'IONIQ: I'm on it' MV Teaser
200901 FILA Korea: Should keep ya eyes on @BTS_twt as they light it up like dynamite 🎉 Congrats on being No.1 on the Billboards! 🎂🍪🥇💜
200901 Samsung Mobile: A “wallpaper-worthy” shot of the @bts_twt lads decked out in @thombrowneny? Say no more fam. 👊💜
200901 Samsung Galaxy Z Fold2: BTS First Impressions (Full ver.)
200902 FILA 2020 Fall Collection Lookbook with BTS
200902 FILA Korea x BTS - j-hope #3
200903 FILA Korea x BTS - Jimin #3
200903 [IONIQ x BTS] Introducing New Brand Music: ‘IONIQ: I’m on it’!
200903 [SEOUL X BTS] SEE YOU IN SEOUL
200904 FILA Korea x BTS - Jin #3
200904 Visit Seoul - RM
200905 Visit Seoul - SUGA
200906 Visit Seoul - V

Articles

Date Publisher Article Thread
200831 Billboard As the Grammy Eligibility Year Ends, Here Are 18 Artists Who Could Land Major Nominations Thread
200831 Forbes BTS’s ‘Dynamite’ Sold A Quarter Of A Million Copies In Its First Week In The U.S. Thread
200831 Forbes BTS’s ‘Dynamite’ Outsold The Rest Of The Top 50 Bestselling Songs In The U.S. This Week… Combined Thread
200831 Forbes BTS’s ‘Dynamite’ Is Already Eligible For A Gold Certification From The RIAA Thread
200831 Forbes With Their New No. 1 Hit ‘Dynamite,’ BTS Has Crossed The Final Frontier Of Pop Superstardom Thread
200901 Billboard Five Burning Questions: BTS Score the First K-pop Hot 100 No. 1 With 'Dynamite' Thread
200902 The Atlantic The Real Meaning of BTS’s Chart-Topping Single Thread
200902 Hits Daily Double HDD lists BTS as one of their picks for Best New Artist at the 2021 Grammys Thread
200902 Bloomberg K-Pop Superstars BTS's Agency Seeks up to $812 million in IPO Thread
200904 TVREV MTV Video Music Awards has massive response; BTS, Toyota lead reactions Thread
200904 The Straits Times BTS mentioned by MP in Singapore Parliament Thread

SNS Mentions

NOTE: Entries with 💜 have new content directly involving BTS
Date 💜 Link Thread
200831 Halsey Thread
200831 Sleep Deez: 🤣 These numbers are insane.. Tomorrow will be a glorious day for my purple family. 💜🧨 Army went crazy 😭 Thread
200901 Pdogg Thread
200831 The Weeknd: really cool. this is so big for asian artists. huge congratulations to @bts_bighit Thread
200831 Jonas Brothers: Welcome to the club boys 🥳😎 Thread
200831 MAX Thread
200901 South Korean President Moon Jae In congratulates BTS for reaching #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart Thread
200901 💜 KpopHerald: Big Hit just shared BTS' reactions on topping the Billboard Hot 100. (1/8) Thread
200901 America's Got Talent Thread
200902 Lea Salonga - "I’ve fallen into a BTS rabbit hole, and no, I don’t need saving." Thread
200903 James F Reynolds: An absolute belter from BTS in the mix today Thread
200904 Bagel Bites, formerly Bagel BTS Thread
200905 Toni Braxton loves BTS and said she likes Jungkook and Jin Thread

Other media

Type Date Link Thread
Video 200902 Media Press Conference for #1 on Billboard Hot 100 (clip) Thread
Video 200902 Lorraine: BTS Songwriter David Stewart Reveals Success Behind Number One Hit Dynamite Thread
Other 200901 Compilation of BTS on Korean news Thread
Other 200902 Jenna Guillaume : BTS Global Media Day thread Thread

Milestones

Type Date Thread
Charts/Sales 200830 BTS's Dynamite is their first UK Number 1 on officially the UK's biggest chart show
Charts/Sales 200831 BTS's 'MAP OF THE SOUL: 7' returns to #1 on the World Albums chart. It has now spent a milestone 20 weeks at #1
Charts/Sales 200901 BTS is no.1 on Billboard Artist #100
Charts/Sales 200901 "Dynamite" debuts at #2 on the Billboard Canadian Hot 100
Charts/Sales 200902 "Dynamite" makes history as the FIRST song by a foreign act to rank #1 on Oricon's Streaming Chart since its creation in late 2018 (7.9m)
Charts/Sales 200902 BTS's "ON" has now sold over 500,000 units in the US
Charts/Sales 200904 BTS' 'Map of the Soul: PERSONA' is now certified Gold in the UK
Charts/Sales 200904 'Dynamite' by BTS has debuted at #25 in the Top 40 in The Netherlands, becoming the first Korean artist to chart in the Top 40 since PSY's Gentleman
Charts/Sales 200904 Dynamite is now the 2nd idol group song with most PAKs in history
Charts/Sales 200905 “Dynamite” has now achieved 100 PERFECT ALL-KILLS (PAK) on Korean Digital Charts!
Charts/Sales 200906 BTS have now achieved 200 Perfect All-Kills (PAK) on Korean Digital Charts Overall (3 songs)
Charts/Sales 200906 Dynamite finishes its 2nd tracking week at No.18 on US Top 40 radio...it's BTS' most successful single on US Top 40, surpassing BWL (peaked at 20)
Followers 200831 j-hope has surpassed 4 million followers on Spotify
Followers 200906 'BANGTANTV' Channel Has Surpassed 36 MILLION YouTube Subscribers (BTS remains the most subscribed channel by a male group on YouTube)
Likes 200906 Boy With Luv becomes the First music video by a group to surpass 18M likes on YouTube (6th overall)
Streams 200904 Boy With Luv has now surpassed 500 million streams on Spotify. First song by a Korean act to reach this milestone.
Streams 200905 "Dynamite" has now surpassed 100 million streams on Spotify. It’s the fastest song by a group to hit this milestone.
Streams 200906 BTS reaches new peak of monthly listeners on Spotify for Korean act (23,658,421)
Views 200901 Guiness World Records "BTS smash YouTube viewing records once again with single "Dynamite""
Views 200905 "Dynamite" has now surpassed 300 million views on YouTube

TinyTAN

Date Link Thread
200902 TinyTAN: We all love bunny on top!🥳 Thread
200904 Korean Herald: Meet Big Hit’s creatives behind BTS-inspired TinyTAN Thread

BT21

Date Link Thread
200903 BT21 PLAYLIST - Sunset Vibe Music Thread

Misc

Date Thread
200902 Jungkook birthday mural London UK
200905 [Throwback] Three years ago today, BTS released "Serendipity" comeback trailer for "Love Yourself 承 'Her'"
200906 UPDATE: Data Visualization of BTS Twitter Engagement (August 2016 - August 2020)

Subreddit

Rolling /bangtan Awards 2020 nomination form

Top Discussion Posts

  1. [+150] Have you guys noticed an increase in quality of western interviews?
  2. [+130] Why is BTS topping Hot 100 a really big deal?
  3. [+101] ARMYs who only listen to BTS but not other Kpop, what’s stopping you?
  4. [+80] What’s been your biggest bias wrecker moment?
  5. [+61] What BTS album/era have you slept on that recently fell in love with?

Weekly threads

Fanart

Here are past week's top 5 fanart posts from our sister subreddit, /heungtan!
Submitter Thread
danzr4ever Custom made BTS/Army Logo quilt.
KimKaura Happy Birthday J.K <3
farawaylightning Crochet/multimedia dolls of Kitty Gang/Fukuoka Jimin and Burn The Stage Yoongi
AUOGil82 This year’s birthday drawing for Jungkook~ ♪(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪
savkat17 Happy Birthday Jungkook!!
submitted by llaverna to bangtan [link] [comments]


2020.09.03 00:23 haircombsnightmare An in depth analysis of LOONA and the LOONAVERSE

The LOOΠΔVERSE is the fictional universe in which the members of LOOΠΔ live in. LOOΠΔ is a group full of lore and secret symbolism, which can be interpreted in many different ways. Orbits have created a lot of different theories on what each music video reveals, and how each member's story intertwines with one another.
The first thing you need to know is that the LOOΠΔVERSE is a universe that exists on a möbius strip. Don’t worry, nobody knows what that is either – so I will explain like you’re five and I’m seven.
A möbius strip, band or loop is a scientific term to define a surface with only one side. The best way to understand it is by making one yourself. You’ll need three things:
- A string of paper
- Tape
- A pencil, or a pen (optional)
Here is a video on how to make a möbius strip.
Something that you will notice, if you grab a pen and start tracing a path in one direction, is that you will loop until you find yourself at the starting point – meaning that the möbius strip has an infinite loop.
If you still don’t understand it – imagine you’re an ant. You start walking forward in a möbius strip. You’d keep walking, and walking, and walking because the loop never ends. From a strip of paper that had two separate sides, you’ve suddenly created an infinite object that has only one side – it never ends.
And how does this tie with LOOΠΔ? To understand better, you will need to read more below about the different dimensions the members live in – but to simplify it, one of the the objectives of LOOΠΔ is to become one – to all exist in the same plane as a group to form the final group. The fate of LOONA is also to complete the moon we repeatedly see in their MVs - which only happens once they all reunite in the same plane.
Anyway. As you can tell, the LOOΠΔVERSE is already more complicated and intricate than you would have thought. It involves multiverses, quantum physics, different planes of dimensions… so let’s take a deep dive.
-- THE THREE DIMENSIONS --
LOONA is split into three sub-units – LOOΠΔ 1/3, ODD EYE CIRCLE, and yyxy. There are certain characteristics unique to each sub-unit. Colors, animals and even fruits play a very important role in LOONA. You can find more about what color, animal and fruit belongs to each member in our Appreciation post.
LOOΠΔ 1/3 is the first unit, with four official members (Heejin, Hyunjin, Haseul and ViVi), and one unofficial member (YeoJin). The sub-unit is said to have a "purity" concept, centered around the theme of love. They live on earth, and created the structure for the rest of the LOONAVERSE.
ODD EYE CIRCLE is made up of three current members (Kim Lip, Jinsoul and Choerry) and one former member (Hyunjin). They are between light and darkness, and therefore interact with both. They live in the middle earth. The abbreviation of their name, ODD represents 3 moons.
yyxy are the mirror image to LOONA 1/3. They represent the darkness in the LOOΠΔVERSE, and they live in the dimension called Eden. There are four official members – Yves, Chuu, Go Won and Olivia Hye.
These three dimensions exist in the previously mentioned “möbius strip.” LOOΠΔ 1/3 is in the “normal” part of the strip, ODD EYE CIRCLE is at the flip (hence why they can travel back and forth), and yyxy is on the flipped side, where everything is reversed. The dimensions each have some specific characteristics. To travel between worlds, there are specific requirements the girls need to meet. Each world requires a certain “key” to travel.
-- LOONA 1/3 --
LOOΠΔ 1/3 is a combination of girls present on planet earth. These girls portray the most realistic and practical sceneries that can easily be found on the streets or in school. HeeJin, HyunJin, HaSeul, and ViVi start their stories in France, Japan, Iceland, and Hong Kong respectively to become unified as one.
Something to note if you watch their debut sub-unit video "Love&Live" is the fact that Yeojin, the fifth member, is not present. However, in later interviews and information provided by BBC, it's confirmed that Yeojin is part of LOONA1/3 and her story starts in Taiwan.
Yeojin is also not present in any of the other sub-unit debuts - and is always considered an extra apart from the sub-units. Part of the reason why is because Yeojin needed to focus on her studies during promotion, and wasn't able to be part of the videos. However, she is considered to be the / in LOONA 1/3.
Interesting fact: it is said that Haseul and Yeojin are very close friends in the LOONAVERSE.
-- Odd Eye Circle --
OEC is the key in connecting the members since their world is in between Earth and Eden. The members in this dimension possess “ODD” eyes, as seen in this image – or, one eye is a different color from the other.
The girls currently residing in this dimension were previously from Earth, as seen in the Music Video “Sweet Crazy Love.” Around the end of this MV, Kim Lip and Jinsoul acquire their “ODD eye” making them able to travel between dimensions.
Choerry, the third member, is a bit different from the other two. If you watch her music video “Love Cherry Motion,” you will notice around minute 01:25 that after eating the cherry, we suddenly jump back to the members of OEC and Choerry wakes up in what is assumed to be the “middle Earth”. Thus, it’s eating the cherry which allows her to travel between dimensions.
Another important detail to note is that Kim Lip leads Choerry into an open field full of mirrors. In one of these mirros, Choerry sees her reflection who handles her a cherry. This is called "the other Choerry," and the explanation Orbits have found for this is that the middle Earth, being between worlds, also has a flipped side or upside down. The Choerry in the mirror is from the upside down. At the end of this music video, Choerry's ODD EYE is activated.
The music video for OEC "Girl Front" tells us a bit more about how the LOONAVERSE works. First of all, the LOONAVERSE is on a loop in which events continue to repeat themselves. An example of this is Kim Lip being able to look at herself in this scene. Right after this scene, we see the casette player stop and go back. This represents the time loop.
Another thing shown in the "Girl Front" MV is that the girls are looking for each other. For example, in this scene we see Choerry holding a map with marked locations - on the top right corner, you can see the animals of each of the LOONA 1/3 members. You can also see the two Choerrys again, the one from the flipped world helping the other find the rest of the sub-unit members. Closer to the end of the video, we can see Kim Lip, Jinsoul and Choerry finally finding each other - and unfolding a map to look for the rest of the members, further reinforcing the theory that they are looking for one another.
Another thing to note which will be an important detail later, is that in the Music Video we also see a mysterious girl running around, which adds another twist to the story that will later be explained.
Interesting fact: the girls of Odd Eye Circle also have superpowers. Kim Lip has superspeed, Jinsoul can teleport and Choerry can travel through dimensions.
-- yyxy --
As mentioned above, this sub-unit is located in the dimension known as "Eden." Eden is considered an utopia similar to the biblical Garden of Eden, and a lot of references about Adam & Eve can be seen in LOONA's music videos. This dimension, first introduced in the MV "love4eva," portrays a world that is seemingly paradise - but it is actually not. The girls have to choose whether they want to stay in this paradise, or reject it to find the other members.
Each of the members of yyxy has their own fruit, which play a big role in their story. Just like the ODD eyes are the key to travelling to a dimension, in this Universe, the key are the fruits. In order to travel from Eden to Earth, the girls have to eat their "forbidden fruit". A scary fact - if a girl tries to leave Eden without using their fruit, it can have dire consequences.
This is the story of ViVi - who was originally from Eden, and by coming to Earth she becomes an Android. It could also be the reason why, despite being on Earth, she has an ODD eye - she tried to travel to the Middle Earth without the correct key to enter the dimension.
If you watch at each of the solos of the yyxy members - you will notice that after eating their forbidden fruits, they each meet their counterpart member from Earth (or LOONA1/3). However, this doesn't happen to Go Won - because her fruit is not from the same family of fruits as that of the rest. Here is where Choerry and Yves come in to help.
In the MV "new," we see Yves dropping an apple to Choerry. Then we see Choerry visit Eden in "One&Only" and drop her apple. This allows Go Won to have her fruit which she can use to travel dimensions. This also allows Go Won to find her Earth counterpart - Hyunjin. Once all of the members eat their fruit, they finally are able to meet and create LOOΠΔ - which we see together for the first time in their debut MV "Hi High"
In "Hi High", the members are reunited in the same world (Earth). One more detail to add, before we move onto the complete storyline as compiled by Orbits - is that you will see the girls constantly running during the Hi High MV. This is because, in order to break the "möbius strip" loop the LOONAVERSE is in, they need to all run together at the same time.
-- TIMELINE OF THE CREATION OF THE LOONAVERSE --
There is no official timeline of the LOONAVERSE that Blockberry Creative has confirmed, but instead we are given clues through member reveals, music videos, and teasers about the sequence of events in this world. Many different people have begun to theorize what events in the LOONAVERSE impacted what, and how every bit of lore fits together.
Below is the story of LOONA I compiled based on the Music Videos/other lore released to date and the dedicated analysis of Orbits.
The music video for "ViViD" starts out in black and white, without color. In the first few seconds the music video creates the effect of an eye opening, almost like HeeJin is opening her eyes for the first time. This symbolism shows that the LOONAVERSE starts with her, and what she sees is a black and white canvas. Heejin wants to fill it with color.
The LOONAVERSE is vast and she needs help filling it with color. So she first creates the primary colors; red (Kim Lip), blue (JinSoul) and yellow (HyunJin). She then creates a separate dimension from Earth, where she resides, for the primary colors where they can overlook the LOONAVERSE. She names this dimension the middle earth (sometimes refered to as Cosmos).
HeeJin first instructs the primary colors to make the color green. So HyunJin and JinSoul combine their colors of yellow and blue to create green (HaSeul). HeeJin then instructs the primary colors to make the color orange. So HyunJin and Kim Lip combine yellow and red to create orange (YeoJin), sending her to Earth.
During the ViViD MV, we see seven rabbits. It's theorized that HeeJin actually only wanted to create seven girls, and never planned for yyxy or the Eden dimension to exist. Darkness joins the LOONAVERSE as HeeJin creates it, and while she was focusing on her seven girls the darkness festered to create yyxy. Specifically Olivia Hye (Heejin's shadow in Eden), who then created yyxy, meaning HeeJin accidentally created Olivia while building the LOONAVERSE.
The next released MV, "Around You", introduces us to Hyunjin, who is living in the middle Earth. We first meet HyunJin from the perspective of a cat. We hear "You and Me Together" playing in the background, which is said to symbolize that HyunJin misses HeeJin and wants to get back to her. In order to do so, since LOONAVERSE follows several biblical rules, she needs to "sin to fall from heaven". So HyunJin must sin in order to get back to HeeJin, but she doesn't know how to do it alone.
In the MV, we hear the sound of something breaking from another room and HyunJin seems startled. She follows the sound to a broken vase, with thistles and water strewn across the floor. This shows us that HyunJin isn't alone, someone has arrived - later confirmed to be Go Won.
We see HyunJin slowly opening a door, to find a bracelet on the other side. By the clues we have seen, we know that this is what Go Won left HyunJin. She smiles, showing us that that she's happy to have the key to let her fall from heaven and meet HeeJin on earth. It's also not a coincidence that the tag on the bracelet is bright pink, HeeJin's color.
We then see HyunJin leave her home wearing dark colored clothing, confirming that Go Won took her color in exchange for leaving the Cosmos. But now all alone, HyunJin is lost. She carries the letters with her, which are used as a symbol to show that now she's left ODD EYE CIRCLE and she's trying to reach out to HeeJin.
HyunJin then wears a cat head, and theories say this means that she has become enlightened. This idea of enlightenment and understanding the world "around you" is an essential idea of the LOONAVERSE. As she sees the world through these new lens and with this new knowledge, she's gained an understanding of the möbius strip, as we can see the same scenes repeating over again, this time with HyunJin wearing the cat head.
At the very end of the music video we see HyunJin turning toward the camera and seven cats behind her; with her included, symbolizing the first eight girls or the original members before yyxy. It's also important to note that she's once again showing her enlightenment and understanding of the world around her by turning towards the viewer. She's smiling knowingly, like she's aware of what she's done and what lies ahead, but she's happy to be where she is.
Later on, in the MV "I'll be there", we see Heejin and HyunJin become close friends on Earth.
The next MV in the timeline, "Let me in", shows us HyunJin (the yellow truck, which is her color) taking HaSeul to the edge of the LOONAVERSE, where she must choose between truth and peace in order to reach her full potential as a member of LOONA 1/3. HaSeul chooses truth, killing the dove.
As we see when the truck stops, the door opens for HaSeul, who doesn't look excited to leave the warmth of the truck. This represents HyunJin opening the door for HaSeul and pushing her out into the cold, in order for her to discover herself and grow. And since HaSeul has arrived in an icy, cold dull place without color, she must expand it and fill with her color, green.
We can assume that the entire LOONAVERSE looked like this before HeeJin brought color, a bleak, dull, cold place. It also represents HaSeul's heart, which is an iced over and uncomfortable, lonely place. Which is why HaSeul is forced to be in the icy tundra, in order for her to find herself and melt the ice.
After that, we are introduced to ViVi in the first sub-unit MV of LOONA 1/3, "Love&Live". The theory behind this MV is that after ViVi's death from leaving the Eden, HeeJin manages to turn her into an android, allowing her to live. But as a result she feels alone and isolated from the rest of 1/3. She tries to run away, but is held back by the powers of the möbius.
The next video in the timeline is "Everyday I love You". The story of the music video was created by restoring ViVi’s memories as a human, before she was converted into an Android. Afterwards, in the MV for "Everyday I need You", we see ViVi rescue a girl from the basement (Jinsoul) who has somehow ended up on Earth for an unknown reason. She returns back to the middle Earth in order to help Kim Lip restore the lost balance created by Hyunjin leaving.
Kim Lip awaits for JinSoul‘s return back to the Cosmos to help her replace HyunJin and restore the balance. During this time, Kim Lip awakens her ability of super speed, as shown in the MV for "Sweet Crazy Love". JinSoul also awakens her ability of teleportation, as shown in the MV "Girl Front".
Under HeeJin’s guidance, the two begin their plan to restore the balance, combining red and blue to create purple (Choerry). But as Choerry was created in HyunJin’s place, she has ended up on Earth, where HyunJin resides. Kim Lip and JinSoul lure Choerry out of Earth and into the Cosmos, where she can fulfill her true destiny as a primary color. Choerry awakens her ability of dimensional travel, as previously mentioned, in the MV "Love Cherry Motion"
Now that balance has been restored, something begins to shift in the LOONAVERSE. Their abilities begin to intensify, uniting as the ODD EYE CIRCLE. These abilities are manifested in their Odd Eyes. Kim Lip and JinSoul both have their Odd Eyes on their right eye, while Choerry's Odd Eye is on her left eye, symbolizing how she isn't actually an original primary color.
We then learn that the person who trapped JinSoul in a basement in Hong Kong has now tainted JinSoul with evil. Realizing something isn’t right with JinSoul, Kim Lip and Choerry attempt to track down HyunJin for help on Earth. While doing so, they keep seeing a strange shadow taunting them from afar.
We are then introduced to Yves in her music video "new", who resides in the third dimension called Eden. This is our first introduction to what will become yyxy. Yves willingly gave into temptation and became tainted with evil by eating the forbidden fruit; an apple. We then learn that Yves was the strange shadow taunting the members of ODD EYE CIRCLE in the search for HyunJin.
We then learn of Chuu, who also resides in Eden and idolizes Yves. Yves simply ignores her and refuses to give her attention, as shown in the MV "Heart Attack". But if Chuu decides to rebel against HeeJin just like she did, she thinks Yves will accept her. Chuu then eats her forbidden fruit; a strawberry, disobeying HeeJin. As Yves and Chuu flee from Eden and escape to Earth, they encounter HaSeul. As HaSeul sacrificed peace for the truth, she knows that Yves and Chuu disobeyed HeeJin. HaSeul goes to notify HeeJin about this.
Back in Eden, Go Won lives shut out from the rest of the world. But with the help of Choerry, Yves and Chuu decide to return back to Eden and and taint her. Though Go Won initially tries to run and hide from the three, they manage to catch her, tempting her to disobey HeeJin. She finally gives in and eats her forbidden fruit; the pineapple. We see Go Won become enlightened and sit with Chuu and Yves at a table with one single empty chair in the MV "One&Only". Who could that empty chair be for?
We are then introduced to Olivia Hye, who came into existence as HeeJin’s shadow. We learn that Olivia Hye was in fact the one who created Yves, Chuu, and Go Won. But why? Seeing LOONA 1/3 living together, Olivia Hye became jealous. So she created Yves as an angel. But as she herself was created tainted with evil, Yves was also automatically tainted.
But Olivia Hye never intended anyone to get hurt when creating the girls. When she learns of ViVi becoming a cyborg due to her leaving Eden, apparently tainted by Yves, this fills Olivia Hye with anger making her want revenge. This can be seen in the music video "Egoist", in which she burns a Swan (Yves' animal). She wants justice for ViVi's death and doesn't want Yves to continue trying to ruin the LOONAVERSE.
HeeJin knows about this and meets Olivia Hye face to face for the first time, feelin sympathetic towards her. Olivia Hye never meant for all of this to happen, but it doesn’t change the fact that she acted out of jealousy. HeeJin then decides to give Olivia Hye her a test. If she succeeds, she’ll be able to win back HeeJin’s trust.
HeeJin returns them to Eden, where they can't do any more damage to her the world. Still, Yves begins to rebel against HeeJin once more. Chuu soon follows suit, and shortly afterwards Yves convinces Go Won to join her as well. But Olivia Hye isn't fazed. She knows that if she joins the other girls, she will just be betrayed again. This explains why, in the music video "Hi High", Olivia looks angry and reluctant to go back to Earth.
The other members of yyxy eventually escape Eden and run off into the LOONAVERSE, but Olivia Hye doesn't follow them, as shown in the MV "love4eva". Though she feels tempted, she decides to trust HeeJin and successfully completes the test. Olivia Hye is able to gain back HeeJin's trust and become accepted as the twelfth member of LOONA.
And this finalizes the story of the creation of LOONA, up to when they become one and get together on Earth.
Fascinating, isn't it? Keep in mind this is only a theory out of many others. While some lore has been confirmed by BBC, most of it it's the work of fans putting pieces together, which is what makes every LOONA MV so interesting and unique. Every frame can contain a clue to the story that they are trying to unveil, and it's definitely one of my favorite things about this group.
Credits/resources:
submitted by haircombsnightmare to kpopthoughts [link] [comments]


2020.09.02 09:33 user_miki WELCOME

Welcome Brothers
I will start first with what men are in regards with their humanity.A normal person would ask why this is necessary to be pointed out.Is it not obvious?Well ,I did that because society has no good words or good attitude in regard with the other half of human species, especially in western countries.
MEN ARE GOOD PEOPLE.
MEN ARE THE EMPATHETIC SEX.
MEN HAVE BEAUTIFUL SOULS.
MEN ARE THE FORGIVERS.
MEN ARE NOT RAPISTS.
MEN ARE NOT RACISTS.
MEN ARE NOT THE OPPRESSORS.
MEN ARE HUMAN BEINGS TOO.
-WHY MEN ARE GOING THEIR OWN WAY?
Boys in schools
Yet boys and men are increasingly demonized by society at home ,in schools ,in media and at their work place.
Boys are bullied and abused in schools by girls, by feminist teachers, by their own single mothers(growing up without fathers) and by main stream media.They are often singled out, reprimanded and shamed, just for being boys.They are graded lower than the girls, they are handicapped to achieve and actively discouraged to pursue their dreams.Many are pumped with drugs,future candidates for mental health clinics.Boys are brainwashed into accepting their gender guilt for the sins they never committed or understood and heavily feminized, stripped of any resemblance of masculinity.Meekness and self degrading is rewarded ,assertiveness,curiosity ,intelligence and ambition are punished.
In the eyes of this society they are the potential rapists, potential racists, potential women beaters.Their voices are silenced ,they retreat in shame,nobody want to be associated and listen to them.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7503273/Family-autistic-boy-five-say-labeled-sexual-predator-hugging-classmates.html
https://archive.is/qDxU5
Boys and men in academia
As boys become men the demonizing continue in colleges.That if they manage to be admitted in good colleges.Most graduates are women because men have no place there.They are not wanted moreover they are actively discouraged to follow higher education. Colleges are increasingly hostile to men.Most scholarships are for women, men are excluded.Their dreams to become somebody great are shattered by an unjust and discriminatory high education system.White boys from poor families cannot have access to higher education.
The men that still get access to a good college are not of the hook.The society will not let them rest,God forbid.They are considered potential rapists, many were falsely accused of sexual assault and rape in Kangaroo Courts by feminists and expelled without due process.
In order to destruction of their soul to be complete they are forced to apologize for their skin color in reeducation courses shamed with mandatory anti-rape and anti-racist training only for white men, not for white women.
https://www.intellectualtakeout.org/article/how-higher-education-studies-men/?fbclid=IwAR0kthEZ0QP0vmbJbcA_FyUWPyEeaoXaa5DUHea8aj46CkF0sDDDa-gCdvQ

They are forced to pledge allegiance to a racist anti-men ideology that want men to be destroyed,to be humiliated and transformed into SJW drones.
Men at work.
The abuse continue with shaming and demeaning mandatory anti-rape an anti-racist anti-white, white fragility training.All our dignity it is stripped with the bullying and abuse we have to endure in order to put some food on our table.Those that are non-compliant are shamed and fired from their jobs.
If the work involves working with women you are always to be careful what you say, what you wear, your body language, where your political allegiance is.You must always watch your back, looking over your shoulder to protect yourself. You can be falsely accused of inappropriate comments, unwanted sexual advances,creation of a toxic environment,lewd jokes,sexual assault or even rape.
All by vindictive women that you may have refused their sexual advances or did not like your look(ugly)or when they want your job position and accusing you of bad behavior will get rid of you without many questions asked.
If you are accused, women will always be believed.The punishment is swift without any due process or real investigation.You will lose your job, your reputation and nobody will employ you again in the same type of job.Your dreams will be shattered ,your life is ruined.
Men in relationships.
As Robert Briffault noticed more than 80 years ago the female of the species determine the conditions of the mating and forming families.Regarding mating ritual of humans a common pattern was observed from anecdotal evidence ,from experience of different men with women for many years ,from women recounting of their personal preferences (so called "standards"),and also in recent modern days with researches using statistical analysis on dating sites regarding dating behavior on personal preferences of men and women.
What all this gathered data managed to conclude was a behavioral pattern of modern women , specifically that 80% of women want to date/mate with the top 20% of men .
80% of women consider those the 20% as the real men.
As society is pumping more and more narcissism in women(girls you can do anything,you are stunning and brave, you don't need men and at the same time you can have any man regardless of how your are as a person.) the dating world became worse and worse,you can see now entitled fat, obnoxious, lazy women with 2 pages list of requirement for the men they are looking for.It is mind blowing.
That human female mating preference was studied extensively in the last years by many manosphere scholars and is called Hypergamy. More about that ,you can find in the The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi and on his site.
https://therationalmale.com/
There are also many articles and discussions on internet on this topic of Human female hypergamy.
See also Briffault's Laws( Robert Briffault English surgeon, anthropologist):
https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/machiavellians-gulling-the-rubes/201610/briffaults-law-women-rule
They consider only 20% of men being attractive enough .Modern women mate preferences include the guys over 6" tall muscular, confident ,with good sexual prowess,having their shit together(those are the common requirements that women put in their bio searching for suitable mates)and/or guys that exhibit the dark triad personality and variations(sociopaths, lack of empathy, narcissists, aggressive, manipulative ).The better combination of looks with dark triad personality the more women are attracted to those type of men.
With the advent of the social media and explosive spreading of dating sites these women have access and compete for these men.They are more than happy to share those men.They make babies with those men . They don't see or even consider other men below their so called "standards".
That left the 80% of men scrapping the bottom of barrel, left to choose from 20% of women that nobody want to date(fat obese entitled women, junkies, tatted single mothers with many children, wasted CC riders, aso).
These included the so called the "nice guys" that are expected to marry the "leftover" women(that have children from multiple relationships ) and slave all their life life raising children of the other men.
This imbalance in dating market left normal men unable to find a suitable mates.The dating market for them are leftover women.This raised another huge range of problems for men on top of societal abuse.
Men in family.
He is the slave for his wife and children.He has a family as long he can produce and provide for them.
In an western type family he has no authority in front of the wife and children(especially if he has girls).He has no say on children education,health ,well being or correction.
When he stopped being useful or annoy his wife or his wife found another man to cheat on him he is discarded like a used rag by the women that play the role of his wife, with the help of government and family courts.He may be accused on the spot for domestic violence against his wife, against children and stripped away from his parental rights.He will be always be at the mercy of his wife and family courts to see his children in the future.
He is divorced raped.He will loose his house, his saved money, his children and he must pay alimony and child support regardless if he has a job, an income or not.Many of divorced raped men end up homeless in parks, under some bridges ,living in the car "drowned" in alcohol and drugs or dead taking their lives.
Men in society
Society is gynocentric put women well being and needs first above all other humans including children at the expense of men.The hierarchy of needs on this society is Women first and Children second.On the economic side women control the consumer market,80 % of global spending is controlled by women.Women have the last word when a family purchase is decided.Men are the support, they are the ones that pay for all this ,they are the drones.
Society uses women to control men.They control them by their balls and by their instincts by men human nature.They use men sexual drive, their compassion ,their instinct to protect to provide against them to chain men into slavery.
For more info read also the book "The Manipulated Man" by Esther Vilar
See also the Warren Farrell's ,"The Myth of Male Power".
That is the book that red pilled me.
see also:
https://www.reddit.com/mgtowbooks/
The society legitimizes women hypergamy and criminalizes men sexual interests. Women are free to sleep around care free but men can be at risk of legal consequences.
It was becoming evident in this decade with the raising of social media and men being able to communicate better and exchange notes that in relationships women in majority don't love men.They don't love men, they are in a relationship with.The relationship is the one of a parasite to its host.They don't see men as human beings only as human doings.We are tolerated as long as we produce/provide something.That is the female human nature exposed.
So taking in consideration all this abuses and problems that society dumped on us, we men decided that enough is enough and we want to take our "toys" and leave the playground.
No marriage, no cohabitation with the society slave owners - women.
These are the main MGTOW tenets regarding MGTOW men - women interactions .Marriage and cohabitation are dangerous traps for men.There is absolutely no benefit for men to be in a meaningful relationships with modern women,only risks.The risk to loose your liberty, your life and your resources.The risk vastly outweigh the benefits.We will avoid romantic relationships with women as that is the framework of our exploitation.
“Most all of nature, males assume a particular role: that of protector, provider. Females, reproduce. But what happens when this system goes too far? When the males are required to provide too many resources, too much security and the females are not even required to bear children. That’s what we’re looking at within Western civilization today.” -Howard Dare
******************************************************************************
We will make our own parallel society with a parallel culture, hidden in plain sight (like first Christians did in Roman Empire and managed to subvert and dethrone its polytheist foundation ) ,with the hope that will grow enough to subvert the principles and ideology of the current society.
We consider that the normal political activism and protesting is futile and a waste of energy and time.More than 10 years of MRA failure, to secure with political activism, men's rights , taught us that much.
We think that the solution is inside of each man.The transformation of himself to become a better man,to put himself first, his dignity,his purpose,his needs, his wants, his will, in order to say "NO"more and to shun this society and its ideology.
On each man going his own way.One man at a time.
We play the long game.
God help us succeed!


submitted by user_miki to MGTOW_all [link] [comments]


2020.09.02 00:38 SammyLovesHistory [MS] Stalking the Dearly Departed Sophie Caine Written By Samantha James

STALKING THE DEARLY DEPARTED SOPHIE CAINE
A Short Story by Samantha James
When I was eighteen years old, I graduated high school and moved away from my small town to attend college. It was a high point in my life. I was over exuberant to be alone and in my very own apartment. My parents were better off than most and could give me the best. They not only paid my university tuition and living expenses but they ensured I had a good place to live in an upper-class condo in a well-to-do neighborhood. I was set and ready for school. I had everything I could need to begin my semester.
I moved at the beginning of summer so I could get used to my new surroundings and make friends before school began. My parents stayed with me the first week. When they left to go back home, I missed them but was eager to explore Florida and spend the summer at the beach. The first week alone I spent most days cruising along the boardwalk. It was pleasant hanging around the shops and beaches. I met a couple students who were attending summer classes. A new friend gave me a tour of the campus. I was having the time of my life. There was two months of nothing to do but enjoy my new place and have a good vacation. I could blow off steam before I had to buckle down and study.
It was not until school began that this changed. My classes were harder than I ever expected and my new job at the coffee shop on campus left me with limited social time. I ended up staying home most nights and weekends studying more than I felt any other student had too.
It started one night when I heard a knock on my apartment door. It was weird that someone would be knocking. Thinking it was perhaps a neighbor, I looked out the peephole but saw no one. After a few moments, I decided to open the door and looked down the hallway. There was no one out there.
When I looked down, a single red rose was laying on the ground. That was all that had been left. I picked the flower up and went back inside bemused. There was a lot of questions running through my mind. Why had someone left me a rose? How had they vacated the hallway so quickly? I looked the rose over musing and felt flattered. I put the flower in a vase from my kitchen. I never gave the rose much thought at this point. It was added existing flowers I already had sitting on the counter.
The days went one and I continued to struggle with school but was trying my best.
It was about a week after the anonymous flower was left on my door I found another one. This time, it was on my car door. I had seen it one morning when I left my apartment to head to the campus. I had a morning shift at the coffee shop then classes until the evening. I took the flower off my car and threw it in the backseat. I was once again flattered like the first flower but still never gave them much thought.
That evening when my last class let out I walked to the parking lot with all the other students. This is when I saw people surrounding the area I had parked. They were giving incredulous looks and talking about my car. I was very confused at first until I saw a sight that set flames in my eyes and fear in my heart.
There must have been hundreds of roses covering my car. Some were scattered throughout the window shield and others taped all over my side windows and the car’s body. I do not think there was a spare inch not covered in roses. The roof also had a wedding cake topper attached with some kind of super glue. The little white bride and groom were literally stuck to my car’s roof. I was creeped out and furious. I went to my car fuming and ready to throw punches I was so upset. I frantically shoved as many of the flowers as possible off my car to the ground. A couple people in my class who could tell I was not happy about my car’s “decorations” helped me pull flowers off. One girl questioned me asking if it was an ex-boyfriend or someone who liked me that had done it. I had no answer. I had dated no one, and this was more than a little frightening.
Originally I had found the one pretty flower left by my door to be sweet and thoughts of a secret admirer were cute. When I saw the first rose I had pictured a tall dark-haired mystery man who might have noticed me at school or hanging out at the coffee shop. I was okay with being admired. I even thought a week later the flower on my car was equally sweet and assumed the same admirer leaving me the rose was adorable; however, this was too much.Who does this? I hadn’t thought too hard on the roses at first but now that my car had been literally vandalized, my full attention was on who it might be. What did they want and why were they targeting me? My mood plummeted into dark depths of fear and defeat. Dread and danger were all I could think of.
I finally, after removing all the flowers, drove away. The wedding topper was still glued to my roof but I couldn’t pull it off. I tried and tried and so did some of my classmates but to no avail. I would need something to remove the glue. It was a stupid thing of this person to have done and now the paint was going to be ruined. This was my first car.
Once I made it home, I went to where the maintenance man’s apartment was located. He was a nice older gentleman who had helped me when my closet door became unhinged. I figured he may have something that could remove the topper on my car roof. The man’s name was Terrance Ortiz, and he had lived here for over ten years. When I knocked and explained my problem he walked out to my car. He let out a whistle as he inspected the roof.
“I think there may be something I can do about this,” He said nodding to himself “I will be right back,” He said before trailing over to the side of the building where the maintenance shed was located.
He came back and within minutes had the offending wedding topper off my roof. Unfortunately, not without damaging the paint on the area of the roof it had been stuck. I was even madder when I saw that because it was worse than I had expected it to be. I thanked Terrance for his help and offered to bring him some dinner as appreciation. He declined and said he had already eaten. I nodded to him as I locked my car up and gathered my belonging. I decided to leave my class books sitting in the back seat.
I went inside my apartment and sat down on my couch. I thought about calling my parents but I did not want to worry them. They would just get stressed out and I could use the credit card they had given me to get my roof repainted. I felt like it shouldn’t come out of my parent’s pockets. I had not damaged my car and whoever did was the one who should be accountable to get it repaired.
I picked up my cell phone to call my cousin so I could grumble and rumble about the evening I had. My cousin Tiffany was a fantastic listener and the ultimate confidant but before I could dial her, I noticed I had five voicemail messages. I Instantly became concerned and worried that something was wrong with my parents. There were five messages! That was not a usual thing. Something had to be wrong. Quickly I clicked on the first message and played the voicemail but it was from a blocked number.
That was strange.
The first message nobody spoke but for thirty long seconds, I could hear slight breathing. Feeling creeped out, I played the second one. As the message played I became pale and shocked. The voice on the line was rough and deep with a distortion that made the voice menacing. The message played:
“Hello beautiful little rose. You are mine”
The next message said pretty much the same thing but the fourth really terrified me. I had never been afraid to live alone in my apartment until I heard the words:
“Rose, you are going to be mine or you are going to be dead.”
I didn’t know who the outlandish voice belonged to nor did I know why he was calling me rose. My name was Sophie Caine. I didn’t listen to the last message. I deleted it before it played. I felt like I was unsafe and did not want to be alone. I called Emily as my stomach tightened in nervousness and fear. She was a friend of mine who lived across the way. I told her all about the messages and what had happened to my car. Emily agreed it was very concerning and said she would be right over. I was relieved and happy she could come over and give me needed company. I did not want to be alone. Chills ran up my spine causing me to break into a sweat as I waited.
When she arrived at my apartment, I played the three messages for her. She was as deeply disturbed by them as I had been. Emily stayed over that night and we had binged watched our favorite Showtime show while gorging on popcorn. Her presence made me comfortable and allowed me to forget about all the weirdness that had been occurring.
The next morning I called my boss at work and told her I needed a sick day to deal with some personal stuff. I told her my car had been vandalized the previous night and I needed to take it to the mechanics. My boss was understanding and told me it was fine to miss my shift that morning. I was happy I did not make her mad by calling out. I knew if I lost my job my parents would be mad. They had wanted me to develop work ethic and maintaining a job was part of our deal.
The first thing I wanted to do was check with the building manager at my condo to see if there was surveillance on the property. I felt sure the school or my building would have cameras and I could find out who the dirt-bag was and perhaps get him arrested. At the time there was this need inside my soul to take action. My world no longer felt safe and I had to do something, anything really, in order to bring back that balance.
My manager told me that there were cameras on the building in the back lot but the one in the front lot had a broken lens which had not been fixed yet. She pulled out the tape from the week before and we sat at her office computer watching around the time there had been a knock on my door but nobody pulled into or out of the back lot. My car was always parked in the front so there was no hope to see who had placed the single rose on my door yesterday morning. The manager, a woman named Carla, was kind enough to set with me for several hours as we checked the cameras the week previous for anything odd. Nothing ever did jump out at us. I felt annoyed but was okay with it since I was certain the college cameras could shed light on the situation and headed to my car.
Once I arrived on campus and explained to the office administrator my request, she directed me to the campus police building. An officer there was very obliging and pulled the camera footage up for me and we sat to watch.
I could see myself pull up in the late afternoon for my first class. We fast forwarded and watched but nobody came near my car. Right before my last class I had run out to the parking lot to switch books and grab the notes I needed for my calculus class. I could see all that as I walked up to the car; however, about thirty minutes after I walked away from my car and had gone off to my last class, the camera suddenly cutouts and was turned in the opposite direction. You could see one white-gloved finger turning the camera. This was strange.
The officer who sat watching this called in his supervisor who also watched the turning of the camera. They pulled up other cameras in the area but as we watched, none of them had an angle to see who had turned that one camera. The two officers were quite outraged about this and profusely apologized. They recommended I go to the city’s police department and file a report for vandalism. This would be my only option since there was no evidence they could use against another student.
Going to the campus police had left me feeling so dejected and disappointed as I walked back to my car. I knew the real police would say the same thing. It was impossible to know who was harassing me. I went anyway because I wanted the harassment on file in case it was ever discovered who was behind it. Once my claim and report were made, I headed to the mechanics and left my car to be painted. They told me I could pick my car up in a couple days. I got food and sat on the pier for a while.
I ended up running into some friends from school as I was eating. They invited me to go see a movie playing a few blocks away. The movie was great and hanging out with people made me feel secure. It helped me forget my trouble for a little while.
One girl gave me a ride to my condo. When I entered my building and got to the hallway, I noticed an envelope stuck on my door. I picked it up with shaky hands and slowly opened it. I sighed in relief when it was a note from the lady next door asking if I could feed her cats because it was bingo night and she would be late. I laughed at my ridiculousness and called myself a drama queen before I walked over to my neighbor’s apartment.
When I returned from cat feeding duty I made a few calls and took a nice long shower. I felt refreshed and grabbed one of my school books to read. It was a nice night so I sat out on my balcony while I studied. I had made some coffee and was feeling rather content. I was out there enjoying the warm evening until after one before I decided I needed a few hours of sleep. I instantly fell asleep once my head hit the pillow and I stretched out all comfy and exhausted.
I was woken up from a dead sleep as I heard my cell phone buzzing loudly and playing the lyrics of my favorite song. I did not recognize the number reading on my phone’s display. I was reluctant to answer it and decided after a few seconds against it. If it was an emergency they would leave a message. I was afraid it was him calling. I got up and started turning lights on throughout my condo. All the blinds were closed and I knew all windows and doors were locked. I waited for my screen to display a voicemail pending message but none ever came. I decided it must be a wrong number or telemarketing call. I went back to my room annoyed to get a few more hours of sleep. I left the kitchen stove and hallway light on but turned all the others off. Once I had made it back to bed and was about to turn off my nightstand lamp I heard a distinctive *Tap* *Tap* *Pound* *Pound* on my bedroom window.
I jumped up immediately and screamed at the top of my lungs. I made my way to my front door and after a few seconds fumbling with the two locks I managed to get out and pound on a neighbor’s door. They rushed it open and in sheer panic I explained someone was trying to break-in through my window.
After my apartment and the surroundings were searched, nobody was found. I knew I could not stay in my place alone. I was just too scared and packed a bag to stay with Emily at her place across the street. She had told me her spare bedroom was mine for the taking.
The next morning I called and informed my parents all that had been transpiring in a very serious and long phone call. They wanted to fly out immediately to be with me but I told them to wait until the following week because it would be spring break and I would have school off which would allow me to spend more time with them. They had already been planning to see me that week anyways and had purchased their tickets. There was no need to rush right to Florida.
After a long debate with my mother, I convinced them to stay put. It was finals week and I promised them I would stay with Emily the entire time and would not sleep alone at my place. Emily and I for the next week took turns staying at each other’s apartments and thankfully nothing had happened out of the ordinary. I took all my midterms and felt confident I would not be failing any of my classes. The days passed uneventfully. No weird calls or roses. I was relieved and began to feel like the whole thing had been blown out of proportion with my active imagination. That was until Friday night.
Emily and I had just returned from a sorority party and were celebrating the end of midterms. We had worked hard so it was good to just blow off steam. An older classmate bought us a couple bottles of wine so we returned to Emily’s place to drink and have more fun. It was a little past midnight and the two of us set up a game of cards out on her balcony. We sat playing and drinking our wine. After some time had passed I just happened to glance over to my apartment. I could see my windows and balcony quite clearly from where I sat. I found something odd as I was looking it over but I couldn’t quite put my fingers on it.
I was racking my brain for what was wrong. I just knew there was something.
Then out of nowhere it hit me. I could see into my apartment through the double doors of my balcony. When I had left my apartment yesterday morning, I knew I was staying with Emily at her place next couple of nights. I had gone around meticulously closing all my blinds and locking the entire place up. The curtains were wide open though!
I knew for certain I had closed them.
I pointed this out to my friend but she thought I was being over paranoid and that I must have had not closed them. She excused herself to go inside to use the bathroom and get the second bottle of wine. I could not get over the fact I had closed those curtains. I know I had. I remembered specifically doing so. I looked back towards my balcony.
Upon further inspection, I realized that light from my bedroom was seeping through the blinds of my bedroom window and that it must be on. I walked to the edge of Emily’s patio so I could get a better view when I saw a shadow walk past the window. My eyes searched my apartment. Time seem to stand still as I held my breathe watching.
I looked to the balcony doors and saw a woman there! She was in a light blue night robe and was casually brushing her light blonde hair while looking down at a book. It seemed as if she had just gotten out of the shower. She walked to the kitchen and grabbed a soda from my fridge. She popped it open and took a long sip. The ladies eyes never left the pages she was reading in her book. She started to walk towards the balcony as to go out there.
My outrage and shock over this lady freely roaming my home as if it were her own quickly escalated to pure horror.
As the tiny blonde woman turned and walked toward the balcony doors. A shadow appeared from the hallway , then a masked man made his way towards the woman. I screamed in absolutely stunned hysteria.
I was too far away, all I could do was watch as he snuck up behind her and wrapped his long arms around her mouth and slammed her down on my living room floor. He pulled out what seemed like a knife from his back pocket. I watched with tears streaming down my face as he stabbed her over and over again. There was blood everywhere. It was splattered all over my floor, walls, and couch. I began to bawl as the intruder in my apartment made his way to my door. He exited my place.
I did not know who the woman was but surmised the man, the killer, must have been the one who had been stalking me and leaving me roses. He must have thought this blonde woman was me. We had similar hair color and style. Our bodies were not far off from each other either. She seemed to have been my build. What had she been doing in my condo, though? I told Emily who had been in the restroom during this time what had happened. I shouted at her to call 911 as I ran from her apartment to go see if this poor woman was alive or not.
I highly doubted it but felt the need to go anyways. I ran and ran across the courtyard into my building and up the stairs to my door. I opened it up and was faced with about ten police officers and paramedics. They were surrounding an opened body bag.
I felt my heart sink. So she was definitely dead then. How tragic. I looked around and was about to tell them I owned the apartment and explain I did not know the poor woman or why she had been here tonight when I noticed the strangest thing.
In the kitchen wrapped in a blanket was Emily. She was weeping her eyes out and was saying my name over and over again to a police officer holding a pad. It looked like he was taking a statement from her but was not getting anywhere. He was trying to comfort her it seemed. How did she get over here so fast? Heck, how did all these people arrive before I did? This did not add up.
I walked around the couch to look at the girl. I wanted to see if I knew her. There she lay all bloody and pale. No sign of life was left.
Well, it turned out I knew her very well after all.
The dead woman lying in a body bag on the living room floor was me.
I looked down to see my facial features and blonde hair. On the floor next to my body were a spilled soda can and my geography textbook.
Somehow I had witnessed my own death without even realizing it.
I was killed at the age of eighteen by my stalker and was given the chance to see the events unfold. It would be years before the police made any headway. My murderer would remain free to go about and live his life while I could not. It has been hard to come to terms with this and I struggled as I watched time move on without being there anymore for those I loved. There is a lonely quality to watching the world move on.
The night I was killed the police had found a single fingerprint of the intruder on my bedroom window from the outside. It was left from the time he had scared me and tried to get in through my window.
It would be exactly five years after my murder when finally a man would be arrested in connection with my death. The police would find my photo, the knife used to stab me to death, and a shirt covered in my blood buried in this man’s background. His fingerprint matched the one found on my window. It was lucky a construction working had noticed the items while digging. He had become suspicious because there was also bones of another person not far from where the killer had discarded the murder weapon. The man who had killed me had buried the body of another woman in that area.
The man was Terrance Ortiz. He apparently developed an obsession with me and, in the end, was my death. He now faces life in prison without the chance of parole for my murder and the death of two other woman; whereas, I am buried deep in the ground. I do not live any longer because of this man. I had no say in this at all. I was supposed to live my dream life and be a major success. Well, no longer.
It is not enough justice if you ask my opinion.
The dearly departed Sophie Caine
© Samantha James and The Chronicles of History: Looking Into Our Past, 2020. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Samantha James and The Chronicles of History with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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2020.08.30 23:04 thecambridgegeek Audio Drama/Fiction/RPG Debuts - August 2020

I've got what I think is a mostly exhaustive list of the new audio drama series that came out in August, which may be of interest to those looking for new shows. See below. Anyone want to tell me any I've missed, and I'll update it? (Note, "new" here means that the Ep1 of the RSS feed was released, or a previously non-fiction feed started producing fiction.) Listened to any of them that you would recommend?
Previous months are available here:
https://www.thecambridgegeek.com/results.php?proof=Releases&tag1=Audio%20fiction
And the ongoing updates (just in case you don't want to wait for the end of the month) are available here:
https://twitter.com/AudioDramaDebut
And I do a weekly podcast collecting a few trailers here:
https://www.thecambridgegeek.com/archive/add/add.php

8/1: Fireside Folktales (Dramatised - Fantasy)
Site: https://firesidefolktale.wixsite.com/site
Synopsis: Fireside Folktales is a collaborative show that takes myths and legends from around the world and breathes life back into them, transforming them into single-season audio fiction performances. Each story is created by a different writer. Do you have a story that you want to tell? Get in touch with us! We’re looking for stories from all over the world, especially myths from regions such as Africa, South Asia, Scandinavia, Russia, South America, and more! Fireside Folktales is here to help you tell your story, and to make mythology queer again.
RSS Feed: https://pinecast.com/feed/fireside-folktales

8/1: Glass Letters (Fiction - Fantasy)
Site: https://anchor.fm/glassletterspod
Synopsis: Glass Letters is a limited series audio fiction story about loneliness, connection, and letters in bottles. Brought to you from an island in the middle of nowhere, and created by Anna Godfrey.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/2baae9f4/podcast/rss

8/1: New Light Radio Dramas (Dramatised - Anthology)
Site: https://anchor.fm/new-light-theater-project
Synopsis: With the shutdown of live audience events, New Light Theater Project has decided to produce our very own Radio Dramas -- storytelling that utilizes dialogue, music, and sound effects to imagine characters and story.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/2ed2c1c4/podcast/rss

8/1: The Embers of Eden (Dramatised - Science fiction)
Site: https://embersofedenaudiodrama.podbean.com
Synopsis: Rival officers Sumner and Hewitt have found themselves trapped inside the mysterious ship which destroyed their own. Finding the truth about its origin may be just as important as staying alive. They'll have to set aside their personal conflict to withstand alien attacks, killer drones, the vacuum of space, and creatures which defy nature. Is the priority to escape or thwart a new danger to all human worlds? What secrets still burn like embers? Each episode of this science fiction adventure switches between the perspectives of Hewitt and Sumner as they fight for survival and answers.
RSS Feed: https://feed.podbean.com/embersofedenaudiodrama/feed.xml

8/2: B-Roll (RPG - Fanfiction)
Site: https://anchor.fm/b-roll-podcast
Synopsis: B-Roll is named as a pun for its ancillary nature to B Cubed (https://anchor.fm/b-cubed), similarly named for the hosts' last names starting with B, and for the fact that it's an actual play D&D podcast. You know, like, rolling dice.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/2cd65458/podcast/rss

8/2: Merryweather (Dramatised - Thriller)
Site: https://merryweather.buzzsprout.com/
Synopsis: Betty is a journalist who gets an interview with a man who murdered 21 people in a mass shooting. He claims that Merryweather, the international candy manufacturer made him do it. Betty starts to realize that there could be more to his claims than she originally thought. From then on she is entangled in a very dangerous conspiracy where she is forced to question who the true monsters among us are.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/1256204.rss

8/2: No Small Rolls (RPG - Fantasy)
Site: https://shows.acast.com/nosmallrolls
Synopsis: Join our merry band of actors for a D&D campaign where there are ‘No Small Rolls’, just battles, buddies and beverages! Dungeon Master David Knight ushers his players Ben Galpin, Chris Watts, Darrel Bailey, Grace Kelly Miller and Vicky Gaskin through a home-brewed world full of stories, secrets and silliness. Episodes are all underscored with epic original music by David Knight.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/nosmallrolls

8/2: The Pink Nightmares (Dramatised - Anthology)
Site: https://redcircle.com/shows/the-pink-nightmares
Synopsis: Anthology series of audible nightmares. Fictional short stories. Very real scenarios.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.redcircle.com/44156405-f015-4eee-ae0b-4f54ef84b062

8/2: Voyage of the August (Dramatised - Historical)
Site: https://voyage-of-the-august-0cbf160a.simplecast.com
Synopsis: A tale of queer love and mutiny on the high seas! The Voyage of the August chronicles the final voyage of a merchant ship bound for England in 1717, whose crew takes their fate into their own hands. This work of historical fiction is presented as a serial radio drama, to be released in nine weekly installments.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.simplecast.com/e5oqyamq

8/3: Forever and a Day (Dramatised - Soap opera)
Site: http://www.faadseries.com/
Synopsis: Forever And A Day follows the trials and tribulations of the Harper, Bennett, and Marshall families, as they face life’s complexities head-on in the fictional town of Augustus, Illinois. The Harpers and Bennetts are butting heads, as the gubernatorial race in Illinois heats up; and brings with it multiple twists and turns that could end up destroying both families! Meanwhile, the Marshalls face new challenges, as they try to continue their almost outdated formula of how to run their long-standing magazine, The Magnifier. Forever And A Day is about the bonds of humanity and the psychology of modern day, socially relevant topics, that are seen through the many fictional citizens of a bustling, midwest city.
RSS Feed: https://www.spreaker.com/show/4410364/episodes/feed

8/3: Pulp Fury Radio (Dramatised - Anthology)
Site: https://pulpfuryradio.podbean.com/
Synopsis: Audio plays for a new age. Pulp Fury Radio is a podcast anthology series featuring a range of genres such as Sci-fi, Noir, Mystery & Fantasy. Giving our audience something new, by bringing back something old.
RSS Feed: https://feed.podbean.com/pulpfuryradio/feed.xml

8/3: The Patron Saint of Suicides (Dramatised - Crime/Mystery)
Site: https://www.suicidesaints.com/
Synopsis: Haven Otomo spends her spare time saving people from jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge. She also owns a private suicide hotline. Possessed with unnatural powers of persuasion, she’s always been good at talking people in and out of things. When a rash of suicides hits the city, a detective reaches out for her help on the investigation, and her insight into why people kill themselves. When the crime becomes more complicated, she must question the people she trusts most, and whether they are involved.
RSS Feed: https://suicidesaints.libsyn.com/rss

8/3: The Shadow of the Hook (Fiction - Fantasy)
Site: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1253579/
Synopsis: Wolfgang Wimmers reads The Shadow of the Hook - a fantasy novel for children 8+ and for those few adults that haven't forgotten that magic (and mayhem) truly exist... in the hidden. A most daring adventure; join Oskar and his sister, Rosa as they help two new friends - Ash (a broken-winged fairy) and Quilby (a young gnomeling wizard) escape from their pursuer, the Grobble - a crazed and vicious troll with only one thing on his mind... to make fairy and gnomeling stew!! May contain scary elements, heroic bravery and traces of nuts.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/1253579.rss

8/3: The Theatron Project (Dramatised - Anthology)
Site: https://www.theatronproject.com/
Synopsis: A new type of performing arts podcast focused on creativity, community, and content. We provide various programming from new adaptations, revamped older plays, new work, experiments, drunken shenanigans, and more!
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/271c9324/podcast/rss

8/3: The Vanishing Act (Dramatised - Historical)
Site: https://vanishingpod.com/
Synopsis: The Vanishing Act is globetrotting farce about a German magic enthusiast, an American conman in Paris, an unfortunately-named engineer, a disappearing French magician, and a duck. A Rambling Absurdity in 12(ish) Parts.
RSS Feed: https://feed.podbean.com/vanishingpod/feed.xml

8/4: Heavy Metal Presents: WonderWerk (Fiction - Anthology)
Site: https://www.heavymetal.com/wonderwerk/
Synopsis: Heavy Metal Magazine’s Graphic Audio Podcast, features immersive sound design & Hollywood quality production in all new mind-bending stories set in the thrilling worlds of Science Fiction, Fantasy & Horror.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.megaphone.fm/wonderwerk

8/4: The Quarantine Plays (Dramatised - Anthology)
Site: https://themerrybeggars.com/radio
Synopsis: When Coronavirus hit the United States, The Merry Beggars launched a contest for 10-minute radio plays responding to the theme of "quarantine." We received over 120 submissions from playwrights around the world. While we can't produce all of them, we've chosen twelve original scripts to bring to you.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/1095722.rss

8/4: The Streets of Avalon: The Bleak Testament (RPG - Fantasy)
Site: https://anchor.fm/whatdoiknowj
Synopsis: An actual play podcast following a group of protagonists that they try to survive in The Isles, a poor and neglected neighborhood in the fantasy city of Avalon. Cultists, guilds, criminals, and monsters hide around the corners, but the most dangerous thing lurking in the shadows might just be the secrets. A D&D 5e actual play using The Streets of Avalon campaign setting from Brett Bloczynski and Encoded Designs. Starring Robert Everson, Eric Bonz, John Arcadian, Brandon Barnes, and Eileen Barnes, with Jared Rascher as the game facilitator.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/2f63d4d4/podcast/rss

8/7: Gallivanting Goblins (Dramatised - Fantasy)
Site: https://anchor.fm/alexandra-ricou/
Synopsis: In the small town of Frome, Somerset at the end of the 19th Century, a young girl called Flora embarks on an unexpected adventure through fairy land. Written by Alexandra Ricou with music and lyrics by Danielle Sharp, in collaboration with Beth Fiducia-Brookes. Gallivanting Goblins was conceived as part of Wassail Theatre Company's Connecting Communities project in response to the COVID-19 pandemic of 2020. Gallivanting Goblins was originally recorded in August 2020.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/2fb617d0/podcast/rss

8/7: RPGs Like To Party (RPG - Anthology)
Site: https://rpgsliketoparty.wixsite.com/podcast
Synopsis: Friends coming together to play TTRPGs via Discord and Roll20. Call of Cthulhu, World of Darkness, Pathfinder, Dungeons and Dragons, Mutants and Masterminds and more.
RSS Feed: https://www.spreaker.com/show/1305853/episodes/feed

8/8: The Lost Adventurers (RPG - Fantasy)
Site: https://anchor.fm/the-lost-adventurers
Synopsis: Four guys playing D&D together to tell a cool story.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/302d0840/podcast/rss

8/9: Porcelain Theatre Co. (Dramatised - Anthology)
Site: https://soundcloud.com/porcelain-theatre
Synopsis: Porcelain Theatre was founded by A.E Quinn and Diarmuid O'Dwyer to create theatre that focuses on giving representation to the marginalised sections of our community. Our pieces often focus on tabooed subject matter. Giving voices to those who are often overlooked.

8/10: Anyway, What Else? (Dramatised - Slice of life)
Site: https://journify.co/podcast-anyway-what-else
Synopsis: Anyway, What Else? listens in on the lives of four millennials who are approaching breaking point. They have never met, yet they share so much in common. Like reading a diary over the author’s shoulder, these audio journals reveal their confessions, anxieties, loves and losses. Is Jess a date-aholic or just serious about love? Is Lucia a star teacher, or does she give too much? Is Jamie pushing away his boyfriend in the pursuit of an unachievable dream? Is Sandy about to explode? Anyway, What Else will have you laughing, cringing and crying.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/3068376c/podcast/rss

8/10: In Another Room (Dramatised - Horror)
Site: https://www.violethourmedia.com/in-another-room
Synopsis: The Violet Hour presents - IN ANOTHER ROOM. Adapted from E3W Production's ground-breaking, LA-based immersive show of the same name, IN ANOTHER ROOM is a collection of interlocking ghost stories, each one taking place in a different room of a notoriously haunted house. These ghost stories span the entire history of the mysterious home—from its troubled construction in the 1870s to today—and recount the tragedies of the various souls that have lived, and died, within.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.megaphone.fm/inanotherroom

8/10: Keystone Horror Podcast (Fiction - Horror)
Site: https://www.keystonehorror.com/
Synopsis: The Keystone Horror Podcast is dedicated to telling original stories of strange and unusual events, not gore heavy descriptions or content written just to gross you out. Each story is a standalone experience that does not require you to listen to previous or future episodes. Every episode is based in Pennsylvania, pulling from local legends, historical events, and personal experience.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/1145786.rss

8/10: Nowhere, On Air (Dramatised - Urban fantasy)
Site: https://nowhereonairpodcast.weebly.com/
Synopsis: Semi-late night community radio broadcasts from a strange little town in the Crowsnest Pass, Alberta (aka, not just the middle of nowhere, but nowhere itself). Nothing ever happens here. Certainly nothing weird. Why would you even suggest that? If you like mysteries, conspiracies, the absurd, Canadians, and what is probably the podcast equivalent of a "b" movie, Braedon, Alberta might be the place for you! New episode every 10th and 21st. Listen close. Don't wander off. It's a long way to get where you're going. Especially out here.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/1256909.rss

8/10: Shelf Lives (Dramatised - Slice of life)
Site: https://shows.acast.com/shelf-lives
Synopsis: Shelf Lives is a series of short, original audio plays exploring the fictional lives of the different people we all knew and loved during lockdown, in the one social setting we grew used to for many, many months: the supermarket. Each episode follows a different character in the same shop, on the same day, at exactly the same time, as they get to grips with both private crises and one very public pandemic. These are short, sharp ten minute insights into people’s lives - plays in podcast form.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/shelf-lives

8/10: Tales from the Rusty Speeder (RPG - Fanfiction)
Site: https://anchor.fm/rustyspeeder
Synopsis: An interactive Actual Play podcast using Fantasy Flight Game's Star Wars: Edge of the Empire rule set.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/2d82f294/podcast/rss

8/11: Donald August Versus the Land of Flowers (Dramatised - Comedy)
Site: https://donaldaugustpod.carrd.co/
Synopsis: Donald August Versus the Land of Flowers is a 5-episode fiction comedy podcast. A boy and his summer nanny set out to play detective in South Florida and instead stumble into a supernatural – and sinister – palm plant. The show follows Donnie, a 12-year-old obsessed with playing private investigator, and his reluctant, teenage summer nanny Lex. You'll also hear from Donnie's retired uncle, the future third female president of the United States of America, and a librarian who didn't ask for any of this.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/1257881.rss

8/12: Plot Hooks Adventures (RPG - Fantasy)
Site: http://plothooks.buzzsprout.com/
Synopsis: Plot Hooks is a podcast focused on the arts of narrative and collaborative storytelling in the world's premier roleplaying game, Dungeons & Dragons. (A discussion show that started doing an actual play.)
RSS Feed: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/757187.rss

8/12: Power Out (Dramatised - Thriller)
Site: https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p08bxh3s/episodes/downloads
Synopsis: What happens when the power system we’re hooked up to fails? A new thriller about power and protest on a dying planet. Starring Vinnie Heaven and written by Sarah Woods.
RSS Feed: https://podcasts.files.bbci.co.uk/p08bxh3s.rss

8/12: Shark-Man the Podcast (Dramatised - Comedy)
Site: https://anchor.fm/shark-man-podcast
Synopsis: IMPORTANT! Start this story from Episode 1. Shark-Man is a 9 part series. It tells the story of Dewey Dorsalfine and his journey into shark magic and discovering his true shark nature on the Oregon Coast. This is a whimsical fantasy story meant for the whole family. It involves silly language and magical thinking.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/fc1fa0c/podcast/rss

8/13: The Art of Ambition (Fiction - Crime/Mystery)
Site: https://www.raggedfoils.co.uk/artofambition/
Synopsis: In the city that never sleeps, the next opportunity is right around the corner... The Art of Ambition is a modern noir-esque series told from the perspective of a New Yorker with his ear to the ground and a knack for turning a situation to his advantage. Written by Mark L. Burrow, starring Joshua Manning, directed and edited by Thomas Mitchells, theme tune by Barrie Bignold. The Art of Ambition was expanded from a monologue - The Art of a Doorman - originally produced by Natalie Winter for Ragged Foils’ Ragged Scratch Podcast.
RSS Feed: https://frog-keyboard-9l8w.squarespace.com/artofambition?format=rss

8/13: The Legion Tapes (Dramatised - Science fiction)
Site: https://www.thelegiontapes.com/
Synopsis: The Legion Tapes are selections from an archive chronicling the world after the end. The alien Legion takes over worlds and absorbs the sentients of those worlds. They've assimilated eleven species so far, and humanity is next on their list. But even after the nations of the world fall, and even after being reduced to communicating solely by radio, humanity's fighting back. Season 1 (subtitled The Archivist) begins four years and fifteen days after the Legion's arrival on Earth. Normally content to listen, record, and edit tapes for the Archive, Owl finds herself drawn into more and more danger after a mysterious car brings the Legion to her door.
RSS Feed: https://crane-oarfish-kdx8.squarespace.com/episodes?format=rss

8/13: The Spectrumverse (Fiction - Superhero)
Site: https://anchor.fm/spectrumverse
Synopsis: Everyone wants to be a superhero when they are a kid. Billy was no different. When he was growing up, he idolised metropolis man and the other superheroes from his home town of Haverford. After a night unlike any other, Billy is forever changed and gains the power to control light.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/310b00dc/podcast/rss

8/13: Theatrephonic (Dramatised - Anthology)
Site: https://catonapiano.uk/posts/theatrephonic/
Synopsis: We bring together professional actors to perform brand new plays. New drama and comedy published every fortnight.
RSS Feed: https://www.spreaker.com/show/4539255/episodes/feed

8/14: Arcane Archives (RPG - Fantasy)
Site: https://arcanearchivespod.com/
Synopsis: Just a Double AA podcast trying to earn our third A. A weekly D&D 5e actual play podcast!
RSS Feed: https://arcanearchivespod.com/episodes?format=rss

8/14: Can You Hear Us? (Dramatised - Science fiction)
Site: https://canyouhearuspodcast.weebly.com/
Synopsis: Hello and welcome to Can You Hear Us, an audio drama following several survivors after a mandatory nationwide quarantine is put in place from the government, only for the virus to mutate by unknown means. Causing those infected to turn on those around them. Spreading the virus even more. Before long world leaders surround the united states with warships, forcing isolation. These Stories are an work of fiction, and are not for the faint of heart. These includes loud sounds and violence, and some adult content. Consumer Discretion is advised.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/2f91b3cc/podcast/rss

8/14: Cryptid Paranormal Investigators (Fiction - Horror)
Site: http://www.buzzsprout.com/1162205
Synopsis: CPI (Cryptid Paranormal Investigators) is an Indie-Horror podcast made to simulate early 40's radio shows. This story draws its inspiration of monsters from wide areas of the internet such as The Slender Man, The Rake and many more. Zeke Battson was accused for the murder of his family at the age of 14. Together with the help of his new found friends Francesca and June, they must travel to U.S encountering strange paranormal creatures in hopes of finding the one that murdered Zeke's family.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/1162205.rss

8/15: Heirs of the Pandavas (Fiction - Fantasy)
Site: https://omny.fm/shows/heirs-of-the-pandavas
Synopsis: Several centuries have passed since the great Battle of Kurukshetra. The tales of valour and bravery and the triumph of good over evil from that time of gods and mighty warriors are just that - tales. Stories parents tell their children to instil bravery in them for they live in a cruel world. No avatar protects the lands of Bharat, as evil in the form of demons, sorcerers, bandits and despotic rulers and all manners of creatures that dwell in the darkness of hell are unleashed upon its innocent denizens. 2 souls walk this hell on earth. A brother and a sister, a warrior monk and a ranger, born in the lineage of Shatanika, one of the sons of the mighty Pandavas. They are on a quest to erase a curse upon their family. Nothing about this adventure will be easy.
RSS Feed: https://www.omnycontent.com/d/playlist/d12d0745-fc3d-4551-91b0-abb4005ee39c/ae5a4aff-f3c5-4ce4-a394-ac0e00855480/ce3e86c6-bc77-4702-93b9-ac0e00892ee2/podcast.rss

8/16: Fantastique (Fiction - Anthology)
Site: http://podfantastique.com/
Synopsis: Stories of Wonder, Dread, and Hope.
RSS Feed: http://podfantastique.com/feed/podcast/

8/17: Metamorphosis (Fiction - Science fiction)
Site: https://www.volcano.ca/metamorphosis-trilogy-episode-releases
Synopsis: Metamorphosis charts the progress of a fictional global pandemic in Canada’s largest city through three fictional diaries. These audio-journals - from a 13-year old girl (Lucretia); a 30-year-old woman (Kerri); and an 86-year old senior (Nella) - are funny, intimate, and often fantastical.

8/17: Silent Hill (Fiction - Horror)
Site: https://audiodjinn.wixsite.com/home/silent-hill
Synopsis: Silent hill is a psychological horror. The story follows Harry Mason as he searches for his missing adopted daughter in the mysterious town of Silent Hill. Stumbling upon a cult conducting a ritual to revive a deity it worships, Harry discovers his daughter's true origin.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.soundcloud.com/users/soundcloud:users:868384132/sounds.rss

8/17: The Path Down (Dramatised - Superhero)
Site: https://thepathdown.com
Synopsis: It’s freshman year of college. Vanessa Ortega is a telepath struggling to control her power in more ways than she realizes. Dexter Sullivan is an aspiring animator still reeling from the loss of his parents two years ago. Between Vanessa’s telepathy and Dexter’s grief, they’ll soon learn that they each have to confront their inner demons.
RSS Feed: https://pinecast.com/feed/the-path-down

8/18: Circle (Dramatised - Horror)
Site: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1266395
Synopsis: From Darker Truths in Strange Fiction comes a twisted tale of a young paranormal investigator, going to find a haunted cabin, only to find something much worse. Will he become one of them, or will he find the will to escape?
RSS Feed: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/1266395.rss

8/18: Last Best Hope (Dramatised - Comedy)
Site: https://www.lastbesthoperadio.com/
Synopsis: After the intrepid crew of Star Command's U.S.S.S. Bittersweet Symphony gets lost in Time and Space, it will take all their gusto to find a way back across the Galactic Divide to save the Earth and Humanity itself!
RSS Feed: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/1259126.rss

8/18: Practical Heroes (RPG - Fantasy)
Site: https://anchor.fm/practical-heroes
Synopsis: Welcome to Practical Heroes! A group of nerdy voice actors enjoying your favourite tabletop roleplaying games - including 5e Dungeons & Dragons.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/2fcdea40/podcast/rss

8/18: Roomie Roamers (RPG - Fantasy)
Site: https://anchor.fm/roomie-roamers
Synopsis: A Dungeons and Dragons 5th edition actual play podcast. The adventure follows the story of three adventurers making waves in the Cilintir Archipelago, an unexplored group of islands found off the southern waters of the Sword Coast. Allie Deutschmann is the DM for this game. Spencer Rapoza plays Damian, a seafaring tiefling warlock on a path of revenge. Taylor Knode plays Inga, a beautiful tiefling paladin who wants to spread the joy of Sune. Kody knode plays Arius, a high elf seeking knowledge that no one else has.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/31972e68/podcast/rss

8/18: Station Obscura (Dramatised - Science fiction)
Site: https://stationobscura.syntaxproduction.com/
Synopsis: Station Obscura follows the interstellar wanderings of one astronaut-scientist Dr. Steve Apollo as he meanders the expanse of the universe, capturing stories he picks up with his frequency interceptor. Each season Dr. Apollo and the Station Obscura Earth team releases the latest three-episode story acquired by the Doctor from a new voice in our galaxy.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/2b30cfc0/podcast/rss

8/18: The Cast Perilous (RPG - Fantasy)
Site: https://thecastperilous.podbean.com
Synopsis: An actual play fantasy RPG/storytelling podcast, featuring home-made sound effects and (endearingly?) amateur players. We prefer storytelling over rules-lawyering, so we use a rules light, old school inspired system, Low Fantasy Gaming. Listen as we tell the tale of young villagers, who are drawn into adventure within the Dolmenwood, a weird faerie-tale forest, in turns both dark and whimsical.
RSS Feed: https://feed.podbean.com/thecastperilous/feed.xml

8/18: What Are We Even Doing (RPG - Fantasy)
Site: https://anchor.fm/what-are-we-even-doing
Synopsis: The W.A.W.E.D DND Podcast. Homebrewed & recorded straight from the table to your ears.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/30f31760/podcast/rss

8/19: D&Dweebs (RPG - Fantasy)
Site: http://www.buzzsprout.com/855625
Synopsis: A 5E actual play podcast featuring a group of dweebs just trying their best to play D&D. Join Tim, Abby, Shelby, and Brandon on their quest to play the world's most famous role playing game.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.buzzsprout.com/855625.rss

8/19: Dungeons & Doctorates (RPG - Fantasy)
Site: https://linktr.ee/dndoctorates
Synopsis: A D&D podcast following the adventures of three postgraduates in a fantasy university dealing with supervisors, monsters, and peer-reviewers.
RSS Feed: http://feeds.feedburner.com/DnDoctorates

8/19: F**ked Up Bedtime Stories (for Adults) (Fiction - Anthology)
Site: https://shows.acast.com/fked-up-bedtime-stories-for-adults/
Synopsis: F**ked Up Bedtime Stories (for adults) features seven short stories written by Alissa Anne Jeun Yi, Dipo Baruwa-Etti, Tim Crouch, Vivienne Franzmann, Matilda Ibini, Amy Jephta and Anthony Neilson. ETT asked these 7 brilliant and provocative writers to tackle the strangeness of our nighttime imaginings and twist the familiar form of bedtime stories into something uncanny, dark and surreal.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/fked-up-bedtime-stories-for-adults

8/19: Futile Attempts (At Surviving Tomorrow) (Dramatised - Comedy)
Site: https://mrkimnoble.com/futile-attempts-podcast/
Synopsis: Futile Attempts (At Surviving Tomorrow) is the new podcast from critically acclaimed comedian and performance artist Kim Noble.
RSS Feed: https://futileattempts.libsyn.com/rss

8/19: Private Detective Randy Randy (Dramatised - Comedy)
Site: https://linktr.ee/RandyRandy_Links
Synopsis: rivate Detective Randy Randy is a scripted comedy podcast that follows the unabashadly self-assured titular character, Randy Randy, beginning on the night he meets Miss Legs, a widow just released from prison for killing her husband 15 years ago. The only problem is, she didn't do it. Or so she says.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/1adbac44/podcast/rss

8/20: Curse of Strahd: Twice Bitten (RPG - Horror)
Site: https://anchor.fm/twice-bitten
Synopsis: Six DMs return to the mists to run a completely Rules-As-Written Curse of Strahd campaign. Our core question: what happens when, rather than luring in a party of heroes or adventurers, the mists of Barovia claim a group of cowardly, cynical, selfish, and/or traumatized individuals who fall—not leap—into adventure? Join Jack, Kaiya, Linus, Tsarina, Twi and their DM DragnaCarta (creator of the popular Curse of Strahd: Reloaded guides) to follow the story of a group of ordinary people thrust headfirst into danger.
RSS Feed: https://anchor.fm/s/32a17340/podcast/rss

8/20: Forties AF (Dramatised - Slice of life)
Site: https://www.fortiesaf.com/
Synopsis: Forties AF is a sexy, sassy, and funny fiction drama podcast about three forty-something single friends and their complicated lives. Hope, a newly-forty entertainment magazine reporter by night and aspiring writer by day, picks up the pieces her thirties left behind. Chanise, a postal carrier in her late forties, is a new empty nester and is adjusting to her new-found freedom. Brianna a hopeless romantic in her mid-forties, is a hairstylist at a very popular and hip salon and is seeking out her complete happiness. These ladies support each other as they laugh, love, and cry together, because – as they’re about to find out - life begins at forty.
RSS Feed: https://feeds.simplecast.com/9ZaMRb3l
submitted by thecambridgegeek to audiodrama [link] [comments]


2020.08.29 00:20 blocknugget BTS Comeback Achievements Megathread (Dynamite)

In the past week since Dynamite’s release, it has already achieved a lot. With permission, I have decided to compile all these achievements in this megathread, following the same format as the previous BTS achievements megathread for Map of the Soul: 7, edited for song (not album) achievements only. bangtan also has a similar megathread found here!
Any and all accomplishments, records, or milestones by the group during this comeback season can be added into the comments of this post. I will then copy them up here into some tidy lists.
Some achievements will be allowed as individual posts on their own. Here is a potential shortlist based on the rules.
This list of achievements CAN be posted outside of this thread:
This isn't a complete list, but please ask the mods (not me) if something can be posted on its own that isn't listed here!
This is a list of achievements, which mostly CANNOT be posted outside of this thread:

Sales/Charting

  • 510+ Perfect All-Kills, most of all time @charts_k
  • BTS' 3rd song with Perfect All-Kill and second ever English song to earn a PAK after Let it Go in 2013 @btsanalytics
  • First song by an idol group to achieve 300 PAKs, second overall @charts_k
  • Only song to achieve 400 PAKs
  • Reached peak of 708k+ Unique Listeners on MelOn. @charts_k
  • Fastest idol group song to reach 200,000 likes on MelOn @charts_k
  • 270,000 likes on MelOn (after 1 month) @charts_k
  • 17 roof hits on MelOn, most for an idol group in 2020 @charts_k
  • 650+ hours at #1 on MelOn 24 Hits @charts_k
  • 25 consecutive days at #1 on MelOn daily @charts_k
  • Fastest idol group song in 2020 to pass 20 million streams on Genie @charts_k
  • 700+ hours at #1 on Genie @charts_k
  • 700+ hours at #1 on Flo, first idol group song to achieve 700 @charts_k
  • Eligible for RIAA Gold (500,000 units in USA) @charts_k
  • Eligible for RIAA Platinum (1,000,000 units in USA) @charts_k
  • Biggest pure sales debut of 2020 in the US with 265k @btschartdata
  • Second week US sales 182k, more than any other song sales week this year @chartdata
  • Third week US sales 136k, Dynamite has the top 3 sales weeks in 2020 @charts_k
  • 8 consecutive days at #1 on Line Music in Japan, first for a Korean artist @charts_k
  • Second week at #1 on Line Music Japan Weekly chart @charts_k
  • Tops Line music Japan monthly chart for August @btschartdata
  • #15 on US Pop Radio, their highest peaking song @bybrianbyrne
  • #1 on The Official Big Top 40, the UK’s biggest chart show (different from the official singles chart) @BigTop40
  • #1 on Billboard Digital Song Sales @btschartdata
  • First #1 on Canadian Digital Song Sales chart @btsglobalcharts
  • Group with most #1’s on Artist 100 (USA) @chartdata
  • #1 on Gaon Digital Chart (BTS’ 7th #1) @charts_k
  • #2 on Billboard’s first global 200 chart (Dynamite’s third week after release) @chartdata
  • Best selling download among all singles in the US in 2020 @chartdata
  • #1 on Oricon’s Streaming Chart (Japan) with 8.7 million streams, the most streams for a foreign act and only foreign act to top the chart @charts_k
  • Surpassed 200 million points on Gaon in 5 weeks, fastest for an idol group in 2020 @charts_k
  • #1 on Gaon’s download chart for 4 weeks, first song in history @charts_k

Official Country's Singles Charts

YouTube Views / Likes

  • 101.1M Views and 8.8M Likes in the first 24 hours Views (Posted), Likes (@btsanalytics)
  • Biggest YouTube Premiere of all time, with over 3 million concurrent viewers @charts_k
  • Passed 1 million Likes during the Premiere (2 mins before release) @btschartdata
  • Most liked video of 2020 with over 15M likes @btschartdata
  • Fastest to 10 million views in 21 minutes @btschartdata
  • Fastest to 20M, 30M, 40M, 50M, 60M, 70M, 80M, 90M, 100M views
  • Fastest to 200M views in 4.5 days @btschartdata
  • 223.8M views in the first week @btschartdata
  • 498 million global Youtube streams this week, Dynamite with 287 million @headlineplanet
  • Dynamite debuts at #1 on the global YouTube songs chart with 220m views and 287 million listens, the biggest weekly debut in history for any artist. @charts_k
  • 21 million streams on YouTube from the US in its first week, BTS’ biggest first week debut in the US yet, surpassing Boy With Luv (13.6 million) @charts_k
  • Fastest video by a group to reach 300M, 2nd fastest overall 15 days 3 hours @charts_k

Spotify / iTunes / Apple Music / etc.

  • #1 on iTunes US, spends 11 consecutive days at #1 @btsanalytics
  • #1 on iTunes WW, 20 days at #1, most for a Korean group @serietv46
  • #1 on iTunes in 109 countries @btsworldwider
  • Record for the biggest ever opening week on Spotify Weekly Chart for a song released by a group 39.9M streams @btsanalytics
  • Biggest total debut week on Spotify of 2020 and 3rd highest of all time 56.1M streams @spotify_data
  • First song by a Korean act to spend 8 consecutive days in the top 3 on Spotify's global chart @charts_k
  • 29 consecutive days in the top 5 Spotify global chart @charts_k
  • BTS surpassed 30.5M+ Spotify monthly listeners, their highest to date and highest for a Korean act @charts_k
  • 100 million streams on Spotify in ~15 days, fastest by a group @chartdata
  • #5 on Apple Music Global @charts_k
  • #27 on US Apple Music @charts_k
  • Added at the #1 spot to the following Spotify playlists:
    • New Music Friday, Today's Top Hits, Summer Hits, Top Hits Philippines, Singapore, Vietnam, Malaysia, Hot Hits India, Canada
  • 560k+ Shazams in the first week @btsanalytics

Music Show wins

  • 1st win @ Music Core (200829)
  • 2nd win @ Inkigayo (200830)
  • 3rd win @ Show Champion (200902)
  • 4th win @ Music Bank (200904)
  • 5th win @ Music Core (200905)
  • 6th win @ Inkigayo (200906)
  • 7th win @ Show Champion (200909)
  • 8th win @ Music Bank (200911)
  • 9th win @ Music Core (200912)
  • 10th win @ Inkigayo (200913)
  • 11th win @ Show Champion (200916)
  • 12th win @ Music Bank (200918)
  • 13th win @ Music Core (200919)
  • Artist with most wins in 2020 (29)

Social Media

Articles

(to be updated)
Please submit achievements in the comments with a link to a good source (Twitter is acceptable for most things). I'll update the main post whenever possible, thanks!
submitted by blocknugget to kpop [link] [comments]


2020.08.27 00:36 Coddy2hottie Nevermets closing the distance on Saturday (Same Birthdays)

Hello everyone! So Saturday is the day we are finally meeting. I am super nervous and so is she. We are both afraid we won't like each other in person. A little back story. We ended up talking on a online dating site. She lives about 2 hours from me in the same county and is 6 years older . We have been talking since May .It started off super slow and started on the dating app. Moved to snap chat, then eventually started texting and video chatting. Throughout this whole time we have also played many hours squading up on Call Of Duty as well. Playing and talking for hours about life and laughing a ton while getting to know each other. All of our video chats have been magnificent. There is mutual attraction cause we both complement each other and flirt a ton. I sometimes can't contain myself when looking at her and talking. We literally have so much in common and the flow of our conversations have been like nothing I have ever experienced or will possibly ever experience again. Our sense of humor is the exact same and nothing it is never a dull moment.
The stuff we have in common literally blows me away just thinking of it and makes me question how on earth I started talking to this woman.
Here is a list.
Both have the same birthday (Born on the same day of the week due to a leap year) six years apart
Fans of the exact same NBA team.
Enjoy the same movies and sports. Baseball, college football, basketball and the ufc.
She is in the exact same car club as my dad. Just different chapters since its another town.
Same hobbies which include atvs, shooting guns and video games, both have taken Jiu Jitsu classes. We also own the same exact gun and the exact same holster.
Both are fanatics of mac and cheese
Both are somewhat shy and introverted
Both are good at Call of Duty. About 80 percent of the time we are battling for 1st and 2nd place on the leader board.
We both have scars on our faces from when we fell at young age. We live near a dormant volcano so there are lava rocks throughout our area. Anyway we both end up falling on our faces at the age of 2. We were sharing scar stories on video chat. You should have seen the look on her face when I said I fell on a lava rock and this is the scar.

So I thought I would share this. She will be coming over to my house due to all the places here are still closed due to Covid. She said she feels super comfortable with me. Also she knows the exact location of my house since she has been to the restaurant directly across the street from my place. So its not like its a strange foreign area to her. Sorry for rambling. Even though we are a few days away I can't contain myself. I am so nervous. Meeting someone like this is so special. The idea of fate and finding a soul mate was once a thing of the past for me due to some extremely bad break ups. I thought they were both stupid notions. I never wanted to get into a relationship again. For 6 years I have been single and just focused on myself. But in May I felt this feeling like I wanted to get back out there and date again. It might of been the quarantine that got me. But who knows. I absolutely adore this person and I hope this works out. Ughh I am so scared to death lol. Any thoughts or words of encouragement would be very appreciated.

Much Love!
submitted by Coddy2hottie to LongDistance [link] [comments]


2020.08.26 21:43 queryboss A 6 year Success Story of myself (US 23F) and my husband (AUS 25M)

Tldr; After 5 years of dating, 4 years cross continental and 1 year (in the middle) studying at the same university, we got married. We have our 1st anniversary in 2 weeks. Should be approved for our greencard in the next few months and he'll be moving in! That's 5 years of LDR with me visiting 3 times and him visiting 5 times plus studying at my university for a year. Covid prevented me from balancing the scales on visit numbers.
Just wanted to share my story. I wanted to use the success flair but after reading the sidebar, we're not technically at "Success!" yet though I consider it a success, because my husband is stuck overseas!
The Story
Back in the summer of 2014, I was 17 and had a best friend who introduced me to an online forum for role playing. She was really involved in it and really wanted me to join her so she connected me to the site's manager and had him message me on Skype. I then proceeded to be extremely slow and clearly uninterested in the game as he helped me set up a character, with him eventually scolding me for wasting his time. I apologized and said I really wasn't that interested but was doing it for said friend. We then commiserated over how said friend could be very pushy and shared some laughs. Then I politely told him and her that I would no longer be playing the game, and I thought that was that.
He messaged me on Facebook a week later to ask if I'd heard from my friend because she hadn't been active on the game site in the past week and it was holding things up. We ended up talking and soon I found myself messaging him late into the evening most nights, and our conversations were rarely about my friend or the game site anymore. In October of 2014 we would officially become boyfriend/girlfriend. It's important to note that he is Australian, and resides in Sydney, Australia. He was also 19 and in college, which when you're 17 is very scandalous and exciting, though now that we're both in our 20s the age difference is imperceptible. We'd never dated anyone before each other. And in my foolish 17yo ways, I figured that keeping it a secret from my parents was of the utmost importance.
Our patience was thin, he scheduled his first visit for February of 2015. I didn't tell my parents until the week before, and then only because they caught me messaging him at 2am. It ended up going very well, my parents loved him once they met him and he and I got along smashingly. Dating someone you've never met in person is a bit terrifying - it's very gratifying to see them in person and know you're still attracted to them, and that they haven't been spinning a tale.
We continued to date, messaged each other frequently. We had lots of "traditions" and ritual like behavior that helped us stay in touch. Due to the time zones he couldn't say good morning to me in real time, so he began emailing me a good morning email every day, including 3 pictures of cute puppies. I would reply everyday with a song that made me think of him. He still emails me a good morning message like clockwork, every single day, to this day. I, am no saint, and stopped sending him songs a long time ago. I used to send him a "video diary" once a week, something I recorded of me chatting about various things for say 30-40 minutes. Facetime and Skype were a little stilted for us so using a one way video worked really well for us. He'd usually send me a video diary in response.
He would visit me again a year later. I'm in college at this point. We spent half the time at my parents house and the other half in my college dorm. Cue first time sex and also true privacy together, which we weren't afforded on our first meeting. He decides if we want to continue seriously pursuing this, we'd have to spend real time together. So he finds a study abroad program from his university that partners with my university. He also asks that I visit him before he commits to spending a year in the US with me. So we part ways and I buy tickets to visit him for Christmas.
I meet his family, we explore Sydney together, and then he flies out to spend a year studying here in the US. It's our first time spending more than 2 weeks together. It's blissful at times, other times we fight about things I'd never even considered before (we're horrible in the kitchen together). But we work through obstacles and come out of that year knowing we still love each other, and that we want to make this work. I believe it's the end of 2017 at that point.
The next year was hard, going back to long distance is infinitely harder than already being long distance. Neither of us has the money to visit so it will be a full calendar year before I'm able to visit him. The loneliness is awful. We're into the challenging parts of our engineering degrees, so we're both pretty busy. Visiting him for Christmas at the end of that year was wonderful, and reaffirmed our desire to be together. We both had a year left of school. We figure that once the year is out, one of us will move in with the other, and the long wait will be over. I graduate and get a job in April.
Cue us discovering the labyrinth that is immigration. Finding out that the fiancé visa is garbage (he wasn't willing to spend over a year not working just sitting around), and that I can't emigrate to Australia unless I have 2 years of working experience in my degree field. That the only option before us is to get married ASAP. We discover this in the beginning of 2019. I'm ready to get married. He's not quite there, wanted to spend some time together engaged… He visits me in May, but we don't pull the trigger on anything. He goes home, and we spend months trying to figure out what to do, calling lawyers, arguing, struggling, cursing immigration. Finally we get a good lawyer and decide to go the Consular Processing route (form I-130) - getting married and getting a greencard. He visits again in September, we get married with our best friends that we met in college presiding and my parents watching. We had a Costco sheet cake for our wedding cake. It was simply wonderful.
I visit him for Christmas again (yeah I just kinda love Christmas, I also conveniently get a week off of work around that time). We make plans for him to visit in June. We assume that he'll probably get his greencard in November. The immigration process is slow and unwieldy but at least we both have engineering jobs now and can afford to visit each other often, no big deal. We've done 5 years long distance what's another 1?
Cue Covid-19. Australia closed its borders in April. The administration says they aren't opening their borders until there's a vaccine. As of right now they're still closed, my husband can't even go see his mother because she lives in a different state than him and Australian state borders are closed. It sucks! But thank goodness we're already married, we're most of the way through the greencard process so we're waiting on the consulate at this point. We're both working from home and we are saving like mad for a down payment once he finally gets here. I'm fostering dogs to keep me company, he's still running role playing games (though not in the website anymore). The hardest part is that with both of us working and with him in a different timezone, he starts work an hour before I get off work, and he gets off work at my midnight - I go to bed at 11. So we only get to call each other once a week, on my Saturday his Sunday, and occasionally on his lunch break if he's not swamped.
What have I learned through this?
Communication is everything. When we fight (which happens, and is part of a healthy relationship) 99% of the time is a misunderstanding, poor assumptions, or something the other person didn't bring up. For example, when he came to study here for a year he assumed we'd get an apartment together. I told him when I met him that I didn't believe in co-habitation before marriage. But he said he assumed that since we'd known each other for several years at that point that I'd change my mind. That was an unpleasant disagreement that stemmed from a lack of understanding. It worked out fine - I worked in the dorms and couldn't have let him live with me even if I wanted to - but it felt like an insurmountable difference at the time.
Don't let other people's opinions sway yours.
So many people told me "LDRs never work out," "He's probably banging other chicks behind your back," "How do you even know each other if you've only spent a few weeks together in person?" I'm a stubborn individual, so this stuff mostly rolled off my back. It probably hurt the most when my mother made a comment to the effect of "you'll understand when you're in a relationship" and I shot back "but I am in a relationship?" and she said "no I mean a real relationship." That was early on, so it's understandable that someone might treat a 17yo like that but it still hurt. If it's right for you right now, roll with it, and if in the future it changes, that's okay, because not all relationships are meant to last.
Would I do it again?
If you're asking if I'd do it all over again for my husband, yes, of course, he's fantastic and I have no regrets. If you're asking if I'd voluntarily get into a new LDR if my husband mysteriously disappeared one day. No, I would never subject myself to it again. It would be a hard limit, that any future prospects be local. Long distance is really hard, not usually fun, very lonely, and requires a huge emotional investment. My husband and I have already agreed to never accept a job with extended travel. We've already spent as much time apart as we can handle. That stage of our life is over (or will be soon).
Are there benefits to LDR?
Absolutely! The emotional intelligence that we had to develop in order to resolve disagreements remotely, as well as read each others moods and needs, is well beyond what most couples have at this stage. That said we severely lack in other areas (re: the kitchen) so we also have quite a bit of catch-up to do. We've also discussed every dang thing one possibly might need to (kids, money, life, death) into excruciating detail because at some point you run out of things to talk about! Also the highs in a LDR are so very high, seeing my husband after a year apart is so good, it's like falling in love all over again. But you have to watch out for the lows, because separating for another year is like having your soul torn apart and it can take months to fully recover. The recovery is often rarely in sync (like his response may be to completely lose his libido, while mine might be through the roof because I miss him) and that makes it even harder. I've never broken up with someone, but frankly I think it feels like being broken up with except you still have each other to vent to.
Do you have questions about cross continental relationships? Or about immigration into the US based on relationship? I have a lot of tips,tricks, and experience through blood, sweat, and tears so feel free to comment or reach out if you have questions. But mostly I wanted to say that if you work at it, and find a partner who is willing to work as hard as you, LDRs are a fully viable way to find your life partner! And not just something the kids are dabbling in.
submitted by queryboss to LongDistance [link] [comments]


2020.08.24 22:02 larki18 The Killers' Interview with Music Week

The campaign for The Killers’ new LP Imploding The Mirage has already endured a delayed album, postponed tour and potential scandal against the dystopian backdrop of Covid-19. Here, the band’s Brandon Flowers and Ronnie Vannucci, manager Robert Reynolds, WME agent Kirk Sommer and EMI’s Clive Cawley reflect on a turbulent few months – and roll out plan B...
For one of Las Vegas’ favourite sons, Brandon Flowers plays his cards close to his chest. The Killers frontman has retained an enigmatic aura in the age of celebrity and social media, so having a fellow indie rock‘n’roller on hand to fill in the blanks feels like hitting the jackpot.
“Brandon is a workhorse,” enthuses Travis singer Fran Healy, Flowers’ one-time touring partner. “He’ll come off stage and go and run for an hour on a treadmill; then he’ll have a shower, go to the back of the tour bus and start songwriting until 3am. He doesn’t stop.”
“I don’t know that he’s any different to me, maybe no treadmills,” chuckles Flowers, confirming the veracity of the account. The rock superstar co-wrote Here With Me – the final single from the US band’s 2012 Battle Born LP – with Healy.
“We love Fran,” beams Flowers, speaking to Music Week from his home in Park City, Utah. “At our very first gig me and Dave Keuning, our guitarist, did an open mic night at a café and played a Travis song, Side, which I love. So getting to know him and becoming friendly has been really nice. It’s always good to be able to talk to someone who’s shared some of these experiences and has done it before you.”
This was meant to be The Killers’ year. A career-defining Glastonbury headline slot (see panel on p18) laid the groundwork for their biggest ever British tour (250,000 tickets sold in under two hours), while outstanding new album Imploding The Mirage looked set to enshrine their place in rock’s Champions League.
Alas, 2020 had other ideas. The group’s UK stadium run was put back 12 months, while the accompanying long-player finally saw the light of day last Friday – three months later than originally planned (thanks to you know what).
“It brought a lot of activity to a halt unfortunately,” sighs their agent, WME partner and head of music Kirk Sommer. “We had a complete 18-month plan with some additional stadium shows in other territories.”
Forecasting the chaos that was to come, Sommer moved quickly to secure alternative dates for 2021.

"I've noticed songs are coming easier as I get older."
- Brandon Flowers
“I had some early visibility as I saw what was happening in Asia and some other territories, and by the end of February or first week of March – while shows were still playing out in the UK – we were able to successfully hold the same markets,” he says. “I do not have a crystal ball and there is no science or data to support this will be a viable time period, but it’s as late as we could go in these venues and there are other tours getting confirmed and going on sale for the spring in the UK and in far worse impacted territories. So we remain very cautious, but have to remain hopeful as well. Demand remains very strong.”
Nevada-born Flowers, who turns 40 next year, upped sticks from Vegas a couple of years ago and has been relishing life in lockdown with wife Tana and their three sons. “I feel a little bit guilty,” he confides. “I’m so used to travelling so much and being away that I’m enjoying the extra time being in such close proximity to everybody. It’s been a nice experience.”
“I’m spending a lot more time in the kitchen,” chips in drummer Ronnie Vannucci, halfway through making a sandwich. “I don’t mind it so bad, except that I was really looking forward to sharing these songs and playing them for people and now it’s... a little different.”
On the album delay, The Killers manager Robert Reynolds says the decision was effectively taken out of their hands.
“It was hard, but there were two factors,” explains the Reynolds Management boss. “First, the album wasn’t completed. Part way through mixing we couldn’t get into the room with our mixer, who had a new baby. Things were done remotely and certain finishing touches had to be completed.
“Still, everyone hoped that Covid-19 would be resolved quickly. At first, the label hoped we could delay a few months and perhaps things could be different. When it became clear that performing live wouldn’t happen for a while, we just did our best to get this music finished and out to our fans as soon as possible.”
“People need music now more than ever,” asserts Flowers. “Music has always been a place that I go to for comfort or escape, or to feel like I’m not alone, and I think those attributes of music are still alive and kicking and people need them now.”
Even with the intervention of a global pandemic, EMI MD Clive Cawley says the campaign’s core objective remains the same – to deliver a sixth straight UK No.1 studio album for The Killers.
“It’s been a stop-start process since we launched a ticket pre-order bundle as far back as November 2019,” reflects Cawley. “With the album originally slated for a May release, it’s been somewhat of a challenge to maintain public and media interest and enthusiasm. Full credit to both the band for delivering an excellent record and our team working the project for never giving up and making sure we do it justice across every department. It’s just kept rolling along very nicely indeed.”
Lead single Caution (49,560 sales, OCC), which features former Fleetwood Mac star Lindsey Buckingham on guitar, got the latest Killers era off to a flying start, reaching No.1 on the US rock airplay chart. Three other tracks: Fire In Bone, My Own Soul’s Warning and the soaring Dying Breed were also put out ahead of time. “We released as many tracks before the album dropped as we could,” says Reynolds. “It’s hard to sit on songs you know are great.”

"The Killers have never wanted to headline rooms too big, too fast."
- Robert Reynolds, Reynolds Management
Recorded in studios in Utah, Las Vegas and Los Angeles, Shawn Everett and Foxygen’s Jonathan Rado were drafted in to handle production duties, with other cameos including KD Lang, Weyes Blood and The War On Drugs’ Adam Granduciel on what is trumpeted as the band’s “most collaborative” record to date.
“I feel good about it,” nods Vannucci, who names Blowback and Running Towards A Place as personal highlights. “We went off track a little bit with the way we do things and arrived at a very pleasing spot,” he continues. “It was like going camping without knowing where you’re going, and then arriving at a really good camp spot.”
Every track is brimming with mass singalong potential, befitting the enormous stages on which they were intended to be played.
“We’ve always written a certain type of song that resonates with a lot of people,” notes Flowers. “We’ve never been shy about our admiration for the Rolling Stones, U2 and these bands that do that well and so I think it’s just part of our DNA. It’s definitely there and it’s something that you think about.”
Reynolds admits to keeping his initially sky-high expectations in check due to world events. “Now that we won’t have touring to support the new songs, I’m not sure what to expect,” he concedes. “Bands that aren’t using the biggest pop writers to dominate Top 40 radio rely on live performances to expose fans to their music. All of The Killers’ hits – and even non-hits that became fan favourites, like All These Things That I’ve Done – became such as a result of live performances. I can’t wait for us to get back on the road to do this album justice.”
Guitarist Keuning and bassist Mark Stoermer stepped back from touring prior to the 2017/18 Wonderful Wonderful tour (“I wanted to have more of a normal life,” Keuning told MW last year). Though Stoermer contributed to Imploding The Mirage, the record is the group’s first to be made without Keuning’s involvement. However, Reynolds insists both founding members remain part of the band. “Extensive touring takes its toll,” he says. “Everyone is getting along fine and I expect that both of them will be more involved on the next album cycle.”
Seasoned festival headliners, The Killers are already a proven draw at the highest level, but their 10-date jaunt now set for 2021 – scheduled to kick off in Doncaster on May 25 and conclude at Manchester’s Emirates Old Trafford on June 12, prior to two outdoor shows in Ireland – will be their first UK stadium tour.
“The Killers have never wanted to headline rooms too big, too fast,” says Reynolds. “Other bands in similar positions would have played full stadium tours at an earlier point in their career. We were certain we would sell the shows out, and the band have been touring in the UK with consistent No.1 records for six albums now. The time felt right.”
“We also wanted to launch with something really big that would reverberate around the world,” adds Sommer. “We had already sold out Wembley Stadium on a previous campaign and sold out Hyde Park in record time to signify the beginning of the last campaign, which was immediately followed by a sold-out arena run.
“We put our toe in the water [in 2018] with a couple of outdoor regional shows in Swansea and Bolton that accompanied a larger European festival run to see how the band and the fans would like them. It was an easy way to try a couple before we overcommitted to something more extensive that we might not love. The thought was that, if they were a success, we would and could plot the whole next UK and Irish album run outdoors.”
The year took another unwelcome turn in the last week of July, when The Killers camp was rocked by lurid sexual misconduct accusations dating back more than a decade. In a blog, Chez Cherrie, an audio technician who worked on the band’s Day & Age tour for three weeks in 2009, described a misogynistic backstage culture and, most seriously, alleged hearing crew members boast of sexually assaulting an intoxicated woman in a dressing room at a Milwaukee venue.

"They are cementing themselves even deeper in the history books."
- Clive Cawley, EMI

A subsequent internal investigation deduced the claims were “an attempt at a joke or a ‘hazing’” by a front of house (FOH) engineer after interviewing crew and tracing the alleged victim, who confirmed “she did not experience, witness or hear about a sexual assault”. The group’s lawyers identified the FOH engineer, dismissed from the touring team in 2013, as a “problematic workmate” whose “pattern of poor management” and “series of sexist remarks and rude comments” had caused “great distress” to the complainant.
Reynolds tells Music Week that although the band were “shocked” by the allegations, they were determined to find out exactly what had happened. “It was important to us that we were thorough in our investigation – including reports from the venue, security, and depositions of crew members conducted by a separate law firm – transparent in our findings and also that we carefully considered what changes can be made going forward,” he explains.
“I’ve seen first-hand what bad men can do to a woman’s experience in this life,” says Flowers. “So if there was something like that going on in our camp, of course, I wanted to get to the bottom of it and thank God, it was proven to be a false alarm. I want our fans to know that we would never turn a blind eye to an assault. We respect women and we want everybody to know that.”
For a band whose two decades in the business have been devoid of scandal, the episode was a reality check.
“It changed our way of thinking about everything,” remarks Vannucci. “We are constantly trying to promote good living and responsibility; that is how we run the ship and we’re going to continue to do so – perhaps with a little bit more of a vision and an outlook for keeping people safe and making them feel safe when working under our umbrella.”
The Killers have directed their team to establish an off-site independent HR contact for future tours.
“If there is something positive to come out of this, we’re going to have a HR development on our next tour where if anybody feels scared or like they are being treated unfairly, or feel uncomfortable in any way, they’ll have a number to call,” says Flowers. “Hopefully that will make women especially feel more comfortable on a job that is predominantly men.”
“Touring and the music industry as a whole was really different 10 to 15 years ago and we hope we can be part of the change to make it more welcoming to everyone,” reflects Reynolds. “We all need to be vigilant that no one is ever made uncomfortable. Unlike other large companies, touring bands don’t have HR departments. For that reason, we decided to retain a third party HR company going forward. I’d suggest every band do this so that all crew members feel like they have a reliable third party to voice and investigate concerns.”
Imploding The Mirage’s predecessor, 2017’s Wonderful Wonderful (182,398 sales), gave the rockers a first No.1 LP in their homeland, although much of the attention was focused on ubiquitous first single The Man (345,592 sales) and its memorable music video. “I always associate the record with the tour and I loved the tour,” says Flowers. “I’m really proud of songs like Rut, The Man and Run For Cover, I feel like they are going to stick around.”
For Vannucci and Reynolds, the period conjures up mixed emotions. “That was an odd time for me personally,” recalls Vannucci. “My father died and I was fresh off the heels of a divorce when we were writing that record. I wouldn’t say it was dark, but there was definitely change in the air. But I really enjoyed the tour.”
“The Man was very successful — a great video and the first [US] alternative No.1 in 10 years since Read My Mind,” notes Reynolds. “Still, there are songs on that album which I don’t think enough people are familiar with. The campaign went well, but I wish music consumption today wasn’t so singles-oriented and people spent more time appreciating entire albums.”
Flowers, for one, hasn’t lost sight of the power of deeper cuts. “We still strive to create an overall listening experience or a feeling with an entire record,” he reveals. “You can’t really do that without having those types of songs and sometimes those are people’s favourites. When I was growing up, I didn’t necessarily know what the singles were when I bought an album. I gravitated towards what my heart gravitated towards.”
Lest we forget, The Killers sold records when bands really sold records – 2004 debut Hot Fuss has moved 2,333,888 copies in the UK, while sales of follow-ups Sam’s Town (2006) and Day & Age (2008) have also reached seven figures. The group has amassed over 15 million monthly Spotify listeners – outranking the likes of Arctic Monkeys, Foo Fighters, Kings Of Leon, The 1975, Muse and Radiohead – and continue to straddle the line between the old and new (albeit, just 16% of Wonderful Wonderful’s sales were from streaming). But it’s not a subject Flowers is losing any sleep over.
“It’s kind of out of our hands,” he shrugs. “It’s interesting to watch it happen – Napster was just making headlines when we were starting, so it was in its infancy and it seems like there is no going back. Sometimes I’ll get a statistic and hear how many people are streaming you per month and it’s amazing. But my heart goes out to a young band that have to prove their statistics before they get a certain amount of attention from their record label. I’m a lucky one because our foot was already in the door.”
Vannucci is hopeful rock music can re-establish itself as a mainstream force. “Everything is cyclical,” he says. “I really hope there is a resurgence.”
The band’s 2013 compilation Direct Hits (752,492 sales) remains ingrained in the albums chart, due in no small part to their cross-generational anthem Mr Brightside (3,212,710 sales!), incredibly still a fixture of the Top 100 almost 17 years after it was first released.
“The strength and depth of their hits over more than a decade clearly keeps winning over new audiences week in and week out,” observes EMI’s Cawley. “Stick it on, I’d be amazed if you skip any of those tracks and also if you manage to resist the urge to crack open an ice cold cider or foamy lager of choice to enjoy it with.”
With the globe in such a state of flux, questions about the future can seem misguided, but Flowers’ ambition is undimmed.
“We were just about to go on our biggest tour that we’ve ever gone on. I was really looking forward to that and I’m still looking forward to that,” he says. “But I just want to evolve and keep getting better. I have started to notice that songs are coming easier as I get older and as I write more and exercise these muscles that I’ve developed over the years. So I’m really looking forward to the next decade and it’s something that I’m definitely on top of.”
“I just trust that we’ll make better and better records,” offers Vannucci. “That is our objective right now – trying to do good with what we’re given.”
Sommer’s thoughts are naturally fixed on the live arena. “We have multiple global options held but refrained from putting anything further on sale to preserve the cash flow of our fans and ultimately be mindful of everyone’s health and safety,” he says. “Once we have more visibility and a better handle on timing we will be ready to go. The guys thrive in the live setting and I know they can’t wait to get back out there and perform some of these great new songs.”
“Every tour cycle has been more successful than the last,” finishes Reynolds, who already has one eye on LP number seven. “Nobody is ready to rest on any laurels,” he insists. “I can’t drop any names, but let me just say that one of the top three Killers songs ever written is on the next album. It’s the best of early Killers while staying fresh and reflecting their development as a band. I can’t wait for the world to hear it.”
EMI is bidding to keep both the band and Imploding The Mirage at the forefront of people’s minds through the end of the year, with a view to a second promotional push around the rescheduled stadium dates.
“There’s plenty of quality in there,” sums up Cawley. “It all feels very much like they are cementing themselves even deeper in the history books of greatness.”
Maybe 2020 will still be their year after all...

The Brightside of life: The Killers reflect on Glastonbury 2019

How The Killers defied the odds to conquer Glastonbury 2019...
It was one of the greatest nights of their careers, but The Killers’ second time around headlining Glastonbury was not always a surefire home run.
The band came into last year’s festival cold and off-cycle, with no new music to promote, having wrapped up their Wonderful Wonderful tour the previous autumn. But the chance to right the wrongs of their Pyramid Stage headline debut 12 years earlier was too good to turn down.
“I don’t recall exactly when it became a real possibility, but I had been gently petting at the potential opportunity for many months knowing the [50th] anniversary year would be forthcoming and we already had our own pure outdoor headline plan for 2020,” reveals WME’s Kirk Sommer. “I knew if given the opportunity it was something we could not refuse, it was one of the biggest and most credible televised music events in the world to spring-load the next album tour campaign with. There was a little healthy discourse around it given the unique timing but they ultimately said, ‘Let’s do it’.”
Brandon Flowers admits he took some persuading to get on board. “My first thought when we were asked was to say no,” he admits. “We were in the middle of downtime and it was a little nerve wracking to be thrown into it like that. But our people rallied behind the idea and them having that faith helped us and it ended up being a great experience.”
“We’re always doubting ourselves,” says Ronnie Vannucci. “We always want to be delivering something new and fresh and we were worried that, having been [in the UK] such a short time before Glastonbury, we were a little at risk of overstaying our welcome.”
The night was an unequivocal triumph, propelling Direct Hits 66-5 in the charts in the wake of the performance, with an immense 323.4% week-on-week sales increase. Ironically, after their 2007 bow was marred by sound issues, the 2019 gig was reportedly the loudest in the event’s history.
Both band members consider the show, which saw them joined by childhood idols Pet Shop Boys and Johnny Marr for the climactic encore, an all-time live highlight.
“I really believe it’s No.1,” grins Flowers. “Not to downplay any other experience along the way, but it’s such an iconic gig. I equate it with something like the Wimbledon final or the Super Bowl and I was so happy with the outcome. The crowd were great and we were a well-oiled machine. We were able to celebrate our career and pay a nod to a couple of our heroes and inspirations. Talk about the stars aligning, they did for us that night.”
An excerpt from Fran Healy's interview in the same issue:
I came to co-write The Killers single Here With Me with Brandon Flowers because…
“We hit it off many, many years ago. He’s amazing. He came to a show that we played with Oasis in Las Vegas and it was a very memorable show for him. All his band members were there, independently of him, before they were in The Killers. I did a solo record in 2010 and I asked Brandon if I could support him on his solo tour, just over in America, so I travelled about and slept in a bunk on his tour bus for a few days. One night, I came in at the back of the bus and went, ‘Oh shit, I’m sorry, man’. He was like, ‘No, come in. I’m writing this song’. He played the melody and I was like, ‘Can I make a suggestion?’ And then we wrote it together. I basically barged into his songwriting session and elbowed my way in.”
Music Week
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2020.08.24 07:13 lolpolice88 British Colonial Christianist Terrorist Coward stirred on by online Rightwing, White Power, Christianist, Terrorist Cells, Trumpscum, Church Cults, Skewed Historical Education and complicit media boosting scumbags like those Colonial Canadian Cunts for engagement. Racists free, Ihumatao etc targeted

https://www.rnz.co.nz/news/national/424269/a-loner-with-a-lot-of-money-a-look-into-the-christchurch-mosque-gunman-s-past
Tim Brown,
Warning: this story includes distressing details of the 15 March mosque terrorism attacks.
It's 1.28pm on a still and warm Christchurch Friday.
An almost entirely unknown 28 year old, who in coming days will be referred to in the most banal of terms in light of his actions - traveller, gym junkie, computer nerd - is sitting in his parked Subaru Outback in Leslie Hills Drive.
He is typing up his final post to the toxic online world of 8Chan.
"Well lads, it's time to stop shitposting and time to make a real life effort post.
"I will carry out and [sic] attack against the invaders, and will even live stream the attack via facebook."
The message is accompanied by a link to his Facebook profile and a 74-page 'manifesto'.
His actions over the next half-hour will make Brenton Harrison Tarrant arguably New Zealand's most reviled figure.
The shooting of more than 90 innocent worshippers on 15 March 2019 shocks the world.
Many people will not support our decision to tell this story, in fact many will be angered at us mentioning his name. But, while not seeking to glorify the killer's actions, we believe it is appropriate to try to understand him.
The story of Tarrant's descent from a quiet blonde-haired Aussie boy to New Zealand's first convicted terrorist is far more prosaic than the atrocity which brought him to global attention.
Born on 27 October 1990 to Rodney and Sharon Tarrant in Grafton, about 500 kilometres north of Sydney in regional New South Wales, he was the youngest of two siblings.
His father, a garbage collector, and his mother, a teacher, were well-respected in the community and the wider Tarrant family was well-known in the surrounding Clarence Valley area.
His parents separated before he was a teenager, but his cousin Donna Cox told 7News there was nothing in the family's background to suggest Tarrant would one day become the perpetrator of one of the world's deadliest mass shootings.
"He was never raised like that, in that sort of environment, you know? There was no violence. No family's perfect, but certainly nothing like that," she said.
He attended Grafton High School. But there was nothing remarkable about his schooling years.
He tried rugby league. But, again, he was unexceptional.
He suffered bullying at the hands of his peers.
"There was a time when he was picked on pretty badly. Grafton can be a pretty harsh place ... so if you're overweight and a bit what some people might call useless on the field, you're going to probably get picked on," junior rugby league teammate Daniel Tuite told The Australian.
Tuite said even back then Tarrant kept to himself.
After high school he landed a job at Big River Gym in his hometown. He worked there from 2009 until 2011.
The gym's manager, Tracey Gray, said Tarrant was dedicated to physical fitness.
"He would train a lot, and some could say quite excessively, but then he was passionate about health and fitness and making those changes in his personal space."
Fitness was a passion he shared with his father Rodney, an avid runner and triathlete.
In 2010, Rodney died at age 49 following a diagnosis of mesothelioma - an aggressive and deadly form of cancer.
According to all accounts Rodney and his son were close, and many speculated it was the loss of his father that started the younger Tarrant's descent.

Wandering the world, looking for purpose

About a year after his father's death Tarrant introduced himself to Aussie Stock Forums, saying he had came into the ownership of about $500,000.
"Recently came into contact with a bit of capital due to the passing away of my father.
"Really don't want to lose the money as he paid for it with 30+ years of his life," his introductory post said.
He asked for investment and life advice from those on the forum.
"You need to change your whole vibe, IMO," one user later told him.
"Based on what you're saying, you have no self-confidence or self-respect, but it's those very attitudes that are needed for success in any endeavour."
Tarrant responded: "My self respect is through the roof, I can truly do anything I put my mind to."
"I am a goddamn monster of willpower, I just need a goal or object to work towards."

On the forum he mulled joining the Australian Defence Force, getting into the real estate industry, or even operating some kind of Australia-wide online brothel.
None of it came to fruition.
Most of his posts were flippant and it seems by August he still had not found a goal or objective.
His calls for advice - financial or otherwise - ended.
Soon after Tarrant began to travel the world.
He visited vast swathes of Asia and Europe.
It appeared he was particularly interested in the countries which had sat on the shifting borders between the Ottoman Empire and Europe during the late medieval and early modern eras.
He visited many sites of historical battles between European nations and the Turkish caliphate.
His grandmother, Marie Fitzgerald, told 9News she believed those travels had changed him.
"It's only since he travelled overseas I think that boy has changed - completely to the boy we knew."

A recluse in New Zealand's south

Around August 2017 he moved to Dunedin, by which time - according to himself - he had already decided on carrying out some kind of extremist attack.
He claimed New Zealand was initially intended as only a training ground, but a month later he applied for a New Zealand firearms licence.
In October 2017 he was interviewed at his Somerville Street home by a vetting officer and a month later granted the licence.
Soon after he started stockpiling firearms and ammunition.
Neighbours of his Andersons Bay duplex flat said any interactions with Tarrant were brief and unremarkable.
He was polite, but kept to himself and no one recalled any other vehicles or people coming or going from the flat.
From early 2018 he practiced shooting at the Bruce Rifle Club, just out of Milton - about 50 kilometres south of Dunedin.
He was also a member of a South Dunedin gym.
A staff member described him as a "loner with a lot of money, but no job".
His membership was paid in full and put on hold in October 2018 as he took his final trip overseas.
He visited Pakistan, spending time in the north of the country along the border with Afghanistan.
His social media from the time suggested he also visited parts of Europe during the trip.
According to The Australian, his mother and her partner visited him around Christmas 2018.
She found him living in "hermit-like isolation" in uninviting conditions. There were not even sheets on his bed.
Marie Fitzgerald later recalled her daughter's details of the visit for The Sydney Morning Herald.
"They just thought he was in a bad place then because he got the guns out of the car and showed them that he had guns. If your son does things like that you think 'My God'. He said he was in a rifle club or something. It wasn't the best thing to be in but he had to occupy his time somehow.
"They never told me for ages [upon their return] that he wasn't in a good place. The place he had, there was no place for visitors. Sharon felt that he was in the wrong state of mind."
On 9 January 2019 he renewed his Subaru Outback's licence online, but he only paid for two months registration, though until 16 March 2019 perhaps indicating he had an end date in mind.
The day before the 15 March attacks he posted links on his Facebook profile to 43 different articles, videos and webpages which collectively give a glimpse into his hateful, racist and distorted anti-immigrant worldview, posting similar content to Twitter on the same day.
He also changed his profile picture to a meme of an Australian 'ocker' brandishing a beer bottle with the words "Hold still while I glass you" written across the image. A meme popular among a group of Australian white supremacists on Twitter.

Another Coward Christianist Colonial Mass Murder of brown people in Aotearoa

On 15 March 2019, firearms and ammunition packed into his Subaru Outback along with canisters of fuel, he made the 360km trip north to Christchurch.
On that afternoon he sent final farewells to his mother and his coterie of anonymous online acquaintances.
According to The Australian, he messaged his mother to tell her she would read and hear terrible things about him, but he had decided on his purpose and it was no reflection on her.
Just how alone he was at that moment was exemplified in his last message to 8chan.
"It's been a long ride and ... you are all top blokes and the best bunch of cobbers a man could ask for," Tarrant posted.
His friends were faceless, his interactions existent only in cyberspace.
At 1.33pm he began livestreaming to his Facebook profile.
Tarrant drove the short distance around the block from Leslie Hills Drive, in an industrial estate in the suburb of Riccarton - east of Christchurch's central city, to Deans Avenue where Al Noor Mosque is located.
At 1.36pm, he pulled to the side of the road only a few hundred metres from the mosque. He sat there for just over a minute before saying "All right, time's up", pulling back into the traffic and continuing towards the mosque.
At 1.40pm he approached the front door armed with a shotgun and semi-automatic rifle, and opened fire.
Six minutes later he left for Linwood Mosque to continue his attack.
In just 15 minutes 49 people were dead.
Soon after another died in Christchurch Hospital, and in the weeks following the toll rose to 51.
Forty more were wounded but survived.
Their stories will be heard over the coming days as New Zealand's first convicted terrorist is held to account for his horrific actions 529 days ago."
https://www.rnz.co.nz/news/national/424297/christchurch-mosque-attack-victims-address-gunman-we-did-not-deserve-your-actions
Tim Brown,
The bravery of Christchurch terror attack victim, Naeem Rashid, saved the lives of others.
Naeem Rashid charged at Brenton Harrison Tarrant as he sprayed bullets around Al Noor Mosque at worshippers attempting to escape the main prayer room.
Despite being shot Rashid crashed into the gunman, knocking him onto a knee.
Tarrant is being sentenced in the High Court at Christchurch today for the murder of 51 worshippers at Al Noor Mosque and Linwood Mosque on 15 March 2019.
This is the first time the summary of facts of how Tarrant carried out his crimes has been heard.
The 29 year old sat quietly and emotionless as his actions were detailed in court.
The summary of facts was read this morning, detailing the terrorist's bloody attack.
Heavily armed and wearing a full tactical vest with at least seven fully loaded firearms magazines and a bayonet-style knife attached, Tarrant entered the grounds of Al Noor Mosque and opened fire shortly after the beginning of Jumu'ah.
In his car were more firearms and incendiary devices fashioned from petrol cannisters.
The summary detailed how Rashid's actions saved lives by allowing others to escape the prayer room after Tarrant entered the mosque.
"The main prayer room is a large open-plan room with few exits. At this time there were in excess of 120 worshippers present. On hearing the first shots this large group had moved en masse towards the only two exits - one in the north-eastern corner and one in the south-eastern corner," the summary said.
"In these corners the worshippers were huddled together and on top of each other attempting to hide from the defendant as there was nowhere for them to escape in the open room.
"The defendant turned to his right and fired 32 shots from his AR-15 into the mass of people in the north-eastern corner of the room. The rate of fire was extremely high and the defendant moved the AR-15 across and back many times.
"While continuing to fire into this group the defendant turned his head and looked at a similar group of people huddled together trying to escape through a single-exit door located in the south-eastern corner of the room.
"The defendant turned the firearm towards the south-eastern mass of people. As he did this, Naeem Rashid ran at the defendant from the south-eastern corner of the room.
"When Mr Rashid was approximately one metre from the defendant, the defendant swung the AR-15 around and fired four shots at point-blank range with one shot hitting Mr Rashid's left shoulder.
"Mr Rashid crashed into the defendant and the defendant went down on one knee. The impact dislodged one of the ammunition magazines from the defendant's tactical vest.
"Mr Rashid's actions allowed a number of other worshippers to escape."
Tarrant shot the injured man three more times - killing him.
He murdered 44 people at the mosque and 35 others suffered gunshot wounds.
The terrorist then drove to Linwood Mosque, where he killed seven more and injured five others.
Prosecutor Barnaby Hawes told the court Tarrant was amused by what he had done at Al Noor Mosque.
"The defendant drove away at a high speed. During this journey the defendant was talking and laughing about various aspects of what had occurred and what was occurring as a form of commentary."

Planning and reconnaissance

The summary revealed Tarrant modified his high-powered rifles, purchased legally using a New Zealand firearms licence.
He utilised military-specification sighting systems and telescopic sights. He also modified the triggers to allow him to fire the guns at a faster rate.
He also bought some 7000 rounds of ammunition.
The terrorist used the internet to obtain information about mosques around New Zealand including detailed plans, interior pictures, and details such as prayer times and important dates in the Islamic calendar.
On 8 January 2019, he travelled to Christchurch from his home in Dunedin to carry out reconnaissance of Al Noor Mosque.
Taking a position across the road, he flew a drone over the mosque and recorded an aerial view of its grounds and buildings.
"The defendant then flew the drone back over the Al Noor Mosque, in particular the entry and exit doors," the summary of facts said.
"From this time the Al Noor Mosque and the Linwood Islamic Centre became his primary targets to attack. He also planned to attack the Ashburton Mosque after leaving the Linwood Islamic Centre.
"The defendant made detailed notes regarding the timings as to entry to the mosques and anticipated times for carrying out the attacks and travelling between the mosques.
"The planned time for entry was to ensure the maximum number of worshippers would be present.
"The defendant analysed the mosque layouts to determine likely exit routes fleeing worshippers might utilise."

The terrorist's explanation

Following the attack on Linwood Islamic Centre, Tarrant left along Linwood Avenue before turning right into Aldwins Road and right onto Brougham Street.
Two police officers in a patrol car were able to ram his vehicle and arrest him without resistance.
During his interview with police he admitted carrying out the attacks and said he went into both mosques with the intention of killing as many people as he could.
"He admitted that the incendiary devices were to burn the mosques down and said he wished he had done so," the summary said.
"He stated that he wanted to have shot more people than he did and was on the way to another mosque in Ashburton to carry out another attack when he was stopped.
"In his interview the defendant referred to his attacks as 'terror attacks'. He further stated the attacks were motivated by his ideological beliefs and he intended to instil fear into those he described as 'invaders' including the Muslim population or more generally non-European immigrants."

Attacker 'misguided and misled'

Victims of the attack have started reading their victim impact statements.
Gamal Fouda, Imam of the Al Noor Mosque, addressed the gunman directly as he read his statement.
Fouda was starting a sermon when the gunman entered the mosque.
"You were misguided and misled," he told Tarrant.
"We are a peaceful and loving community. We did not deserve your actions.
"We go to the mosque for peace and worship.
"Your hatred is unnecessary. If you have done anything you have brought the community closer together with your evil actions."
The convicted terrorist made eye contact with the Imam, but did not react in anyway.
He sat emotionless, shackled and surrounded by Corrections officers.
The parents of Ata Elayyan told the convicted terrorist they would never forgive him for taking their son's life.
Ata Elayyan was murdered at Al Noor Mosque.
Ata's father, Mohammad Alayan, recited the Quran to the court.
Earlier on 15 March 2019, he had swapped cars with Ata so he could move property from his apartment.
Alayan told his son to come to Al Noor Mosque early so "he could gain maximum rewards from this blessed day" and swap cars again.
"The day started beautifully - there is no match for Ata's wonderful smile to make a day," he said.
He had met with other organisers at the mosque before prayers began.
The details of the shooting were vague, but he remembered being in severe pain spiritually.
"I was in a state of deep worry about my beloved son praying to Allah that Ata was delayed from coming to the mosque and also in deep sadness for my beloved dead brothers next to me," he said.
They had no news about Ata that day.
"For three days we did not have any news on our beloved Ata.
"Then the devastating news came. Ata had passed away."
When he finally saw Ata's body he was "sitting in his casket as beautiful as an angel with a beautiful smile on his face".
Ata's mother, Maysoon Salama, told Tarrant he had not only killed her son, but his own humanity.
"You gave yourself the authority to take the souls of 51 innocent people. Their only crime in your eyes was being Muslim," she said to him.
"You terrorised the whole of New Zealand and saddened the world. You killed your own humanity and I don't think the world will forgive you for your horrible crime against humanity."
She called on Allah to ensure he would face the most severe punishment in the hereafter.
"You transgressed and you thought you could break us. You failed miserably.
"Our beloved ones are martyrs."
Ata's mother, Maysoon Salama, told Tarrant he had not only killed her son but his own humanity.
She said she doesn't believe the world will ever forgive him."
submitted by lolpolice88 to Maori [link] [comments]


2020.08.24 03:44 Zithero I Perform Exorcisms, I travel with the Mother of Demons (Part 2)

Part 1
I have made a habit of this, so I suppose I best begin with an introduction.
I am Father Edward Thomas, aged fifty-six, I am a priest of the Vatican and I am an Exorcist.
My travels have seen me not carry any particular companions before, but now I have an odd pairing coming with me on my charges.
The pair are Trevor Macaione and his close friend Trisha Braeburn. No, they are not a couple, Trisha has a… let us say “long-distance relationship.”
“Can I ask why the hell we’re in front of a cemetery?” Trisha asked, pulling her denim jacket up over her rather well-worn band t-shirt. I did my best to ignore that it was a shirt bearing a number of occult symbols on the front. She wore a pair of chunky thigh high boots and tight jeans under them.
“I do not appreciate that shirt,” I grumbled, looking over the multiple occult symbols on the front.
“Most folks do feel a bit, Disturbed by it,” Trisha snickered.
I sighed.
“Ooo-Wah-Ah-Ah!” Trisha half shouted half coughed.
Trevor and I gave her an odd stare.
“You guys are so boring,” she tossed her hair back, grumbling. Today’s hair color was a supposed bright blue but appeared ghostly pale in the evening moonlight.
Trevor walked out, lighting a cigarette in the unusually cool summer night air. He adjusted his brown trench coat and walked up to the large rusted iron gate of the cemetery. “Yeah, Father, I get the feeling that anyone possessed here might be too far gone to save.”
I turned to Trevor, narrowing my eyes, “Even souls in hell are worthy of salvation.”
“Said the man who sends souls to hell on the regular,” Trisha said as she placed her hand on the old rusted gate.
“Demons,” I corrected.
Trisha gave a nod, “yeah I know,” she grimaced as she pushed the gate, “we were invited, right?”
A distraught man rushed to the gate, shaking it as he briskly fiddled with a padlock, “Thank God you’re here!”
Trevor had been startled by the man’s sudden appearance.
His hands were stained with dirt and heavily calloused, he wore a flannel shirt fitted over his broad chest, jeans and work boots. He was on the later side of his twenties. The only odd mark on him was a thick mustache adorned on his strangely handsome face.
His greasy black hair and dark eyes showed he did not get much sleep nor time in recent days for self-maintenance.
“Are you Andrew?” I asked.
“Andy, yes,” he removed the chain from the lock, his hands holding it shakily as he opened the gates, “Andy is just fine. I’m the groundskeeper that you spoke with on the phone.”
“Father Thomas,” I introduced, “and my assistants Trevor and Trisha.”
“Sup,” Trisha said, flicking her chin up to the man.
Trevor merely waved as he took another drag from his cigarette.
“Let me show you the issue,” Andy led us through an old cemetery.
Very few fresh plots were present, however, the plots here were not worn down by the weather. Tombstones which should have faded names from time did not even have cracks as expected. While the grounds seemed well kept otherwise, it seemed not a single area was lacking in proper maintenance.
“It started a month ago. Thought I just had the jitters yah know? Working alone, nothing but dead folk to keep me company,” Andy rambled, almost exaggerating his distraught state. As we passed by a particularly well cared for tombstone, “hi Clarence.”
I turned to see a name on the tombstone: Clarence Hopkins, 1775 to 1824. Loving Father.
Trisha turned to the tombstone as well, “Evening Clarence,” she mimicked.
I raised an eyebrow as we passed the old, strangely well-preserved tombstone, despite being almost two hundred years old, I noted.
Trevor shook his head as we continued on.
“It’s this mausoleum,” Andy now motioned to a pristine ivy-covered and well kept looking mausoleum which appeared to be central to the entire cemetery. If it were not for the old design of the mausoleum being around the civil war, I would have thought it was a new restoration.
It held a massive pair of obelisks on either side of it and a stone figure holding a book in one hand, the other arm held aloft, around its raised hand was a serpent eating its own tail.
The slated iron doors were locked, clearly, but did not have a hint of rust on their hinges.
“Not at all disturbing,” Trevor said out loud.
Andy nodded, “you feel it too right? That dark power?”
Trisha lifted an eyebrow at Andy, “What do you mean?”
“The dark power from inside? You don’t feel it?” Andy shivered, “it gives me the willies.”
I gave a curious glance to Andy and then addressed Trisha and Trevor, “shall we investigate?”
Trevor put his cigarette out by way of crushing it to the ground, and moved towards the mausoleum, “aight.”
Andy grumbled, “This is a cemetery, not an ashtray, boy.”
Trevor turned around and picked up his cigarette butt, “sorry,” he grumbled, slipping it into his pocket as he rolled his eyes.
Andy turned around, making his way to a small shack with several large floodlights and a very sturdy metal door.
“We need the keys, yes?” I asked.
Andy halted, turning around slowly, “The keys? You don’t actually plan on going in there, do you?” He seemed to be playing at something, overselling the desire for us not to go inside.
I gave a nod, “If I’m to bless a location it must be both inside and out.”
Andy cleared his throat and pulled out a large keyring, flicking through the ring he found an older and silver tarnished, barrel key. The top of the key had a simple loop, while the bottom had a pair of notches around the rounded base. It was not a very large key, but still, it had some weight to it, to my surprise. “That’s for the padlock. Good luck,” Andy frowned and made his way to his groundskeeper shack.
Upon getting to the door of the little shack he entered, several locks could be heard latching into place upon the door closing.
“That’s not ominous,” Trisha frowned.
“Indeed,” I made my way up the impeccably maintained stone pathway, “I have a feeling the groundskeeper knows more than he is letting on.”
“That guy stinks,” Trisha commented.
I wondered if Trisha spoke of the cologne that the man had, it seemed expensive.
As we made our way up the path, Trevor pointed to a row of plots, “this is an old cemetery, right? Not in use anymore?”
I nodded, “Yes, it’s a heritage site, why?” I asked.
“Then why are there a couple of opened holes?” Trevor asked as he pointed to four fresh plots, three of which were opened.
“That is curious,” I frowned, “perhaps we can ask on our way out.”
Trevor reached the large slat metal gate, peeking in on the mausoleum, “of course there’s a basement.”
I slipped the key into the old padlock, examining the rusted metal. Strangely the lock and chain were the only things that were rusted.
Adorning the lock itself was a silver cross. Wrapped around it was a pendant, a much newer pendant, of Saint Benedict, no less.
I frowned, “he knows far more than he is letting on.”
Trevor looked at the padlock and pendant in my hand, “what is that?”
“Saint Benedict - it’s a protection talisman,” I informed as I reached into my bag and procured a bottle of holy water, “either Andy has gotten the nerve to place this on the lock before calling us,” I fixed Trevor with a stern gaze, “or he knows what is inside.”
“Super,” Trisha chirped.
I wrapped my rosary beads around my hand and slowly turned the key.
As the padlock clicks, a gust of foul air rushed up from the depths of the crypt below. I unwrapped the chain holding the pendant of Saint Benedict. I wrapped it along with my rosary beads, keeping it with me in case it was needed.
Trevor gagged, “oh man that’s rank.”
I undid the lock, bringing my sleeve to my nose, and opened the black iron gate enough to allow us inside.
As we walked in, Trevor pulled out a flashlight, illuminating the granite walls, which seemed oddly free of decay. Some green climbing vines had intruded into the building through cracks, windows, and so forth. None of the vines seemed deprived of nutrition or appeared trimmed back.
I saw a stained glass window near the top of the far wall overlooking the staircase going down. The glass was depicting a pot with another snake devouring its own tail. “Curious,” I announced.
Trevor looked at Trisha and I, then said, “I guess I lead the way, huh?”
Trisha nodded, “yep, you’ve got the flashlight.”
“Fuck me,” Trevor grumbled as he made his way downward.
I followed behind him, unsure of what dangers we would face.
“I’m feeling something,” Trisha shivered, “it’s not familiar to me.”
Awesome,” Trevor said sarcastically.
I too could feel an undesirable chill coming over me. Each step down the stairs seemed to fill me with dread, as we descended. My hand clenched the pendant as we continued our descent.
“How deep does this go?” Trevor asked as he pushed on.
Once we reached the base of the stairs, I could not help but shudder.
A long hallway, with a short ceiling, led deep below. This was not a typical crypt, it felt far more like a catacomb.
The direction the hall took was such that it exposed the heads and feet of every coffin in a particular row.
“Okay, yeah, that’s a no from me,” Trevor said as he turned around.
Trisha blocked his path, “there is something down there that way,” she pointed, narrowing her eyes at Trevor.
“Personal preference is to keep a good six-feet of soil between me and any decomposing corpses,” Trevor grumbled.
“I assure you,” I said as I passed by a few of the old but still intact caskets, “no one is going anywhere inside here.” I used my own small flashlight to illuminate the casket nearest me.
Despite the age of the cemetery, the casket, though old, appeared flawlessly preserved. I could even make out the cross on the top of the casket’s head. It was nailed shut and the wood was clearly well oiled and prepared to spend eternity underground. I do not recall a wooden casket ever being so well preserved.
“They don’t make ‘em like they used to, huh?” Trisha asked as she examined the foot of one casket, “weird. It’s like new.”
Trevor grumbled and took his place leading us once more.
Trisha whispered now as if her voice being too loud would wake the dead we were passing, “I don’t get it, none of these caskets are marked, why are there exposed caskets in this crypt?”
I shook my head, “I am unsure. Our caretaker clearly left this information out of his request.”
A voice soon echoed from down the corridor of caskets, “Come ye who seek and stay with those who rest.
“In English, pal!” Trevor shouted.
I shuddered, “It means if we venture further, we will join those resting here,” I pulled out my holy water, keeping it at the ready.
“Who are you, buddy?” Trevor shouted to the disembodied voice.
“Trevor, a demon would not give out his name so easily,” I began to chastise as the voice answered.
I am Halahel,” the voice seemed to crawl along the well-formed clay walls, “come if ye dare.”
Trisha grumbled, “I hate when they talk all ‘bible verses’ at us.”
Trevor turned to Trisha, lifting an eyebrow, “doesn’t Sam do that?”
Trisha rolled her eyes, “yeah, try telling Sam not to do something.”
“He doesn’t listen to you?” Trevor snickered.
“Sam barely listens to God,” Trisha remarked.
“Samael and I have a great difference of methods then,” I pointed out, “we should move onward. We have God’s protection.”
Trevor took a deep breath and we soldiered onward.
At the end of the long corridor was a turn. It, thankfully, had no exposed coffins. But rather at the far end of this corridor was an altar. The altar had oil lamps lit recently, many leading to the altar were meticulously dug into the sides of the walls. At the center of the altar sat a statue.
The statue was a strange one. A man sat, covered in tarnished bronze, holding a jar on his lap. The man wore clothing I would say normally would be from the late twenties, the entire statue was eerily lifelike.
Trevor frowned, “...totally normal.”
“What the hell is that doing here?” Trisha frowned, “and what is it?”
A horrific stench emanated from the statue, the jar resonating as the voice returned, “Thou stand before, Halahel. Give unto me thy essences to be joined with me for eternity.
Trevor gasped, falling to his knees, coughing.
Trisha staggered back, her hand over her mouth, “oh, that’s so nasty.”
While the smell was terrible, I was not having the same reaction as my companions. I turned to the statue to see a strange mist rising from the jar.
The statue’s eyes now opened and behind them were human eyes. They were brown eyes, bloodshot and tears ran down the face of the statue. I heard someone struggling for breath.
“Ye who doth not fall to my miasma, who art thou?” the voice resonated again from the jar.
“Miasma?” I turned to Trevor, noticing he continued to cough. I rushed to his aid, ripping a part of my sleeve, and poured a bit of holy water onto the cloth, “breath through this!”
Trevor took the soaked cloth and inhaled, the color returning to his face, “t-thanks.”
The ground shook and I turned back to the odd statue, the flames from the oil lamps now swirling.
The eyes in the statue looked left and right, pleading and panicked, as the jar continued to resonate, “Thou fools, thou doth not know what power thy confront!”
I raised my rosary, cross and the seal of Saint Benedict, “I know your motives foul, and your machinations malevolent, foul spirit, be gone!”
Foul spirit?!” the voice resonated from the jar, “I merely punish those who seek to defy almighty God’s natural law! And, in doing so, I curse the one who hath brought me here.”
A loud locking noise could be heard from down the hallway.
Trisha announced, “uh, guys, our exit just got closed off.”
Trevor grumbled, “great,” he cracked his neck, “now we’re trapped with he who smelt it.”
"Let me check the locks to see how 'trapped' we are!” Trisha announced as she ran back down the corridor.
“Trevor,” I warned, “let us not take this foe lightly,” I approached the statue, looking into the eyes, which clearly were not that of a demon.
Set not another foot before the altar of Halahel or thou shall suffer the wrath of defying the Lord God’s natural law!” the voice boomed.
“I am Father Edward Thomas,” I announced, “I am a man of God, and I come to remove the taint from this place of reverence! What violation of God do you so seek to punish, Halahel?” I asked, gripping the pendant in my hand.
Halahel’s mist rose faster from the pot, and I had to cover my mouth now, the stench causing my eyes to water.
The hubris to defy death!” the hallway shook. “For those who seek immortal life shall forever suffer it!”
I looked into the eyes of the man inside the bronze statue, his tears running down the bronze cheeks, clearly having stained the surface for many years.
“What dark pact have you made, Halahel?” I demanded.
“Thou ask what pacts thy hath made?!” the voice resonated from the jar once more.
I had an idea, reaching out with the holy water and pouring it into the jar.
The previously green mist now turned to steam and the halls shook violently. I staggered back, holding up my rosary beads as the oil lamps dimmed and the voice screamed loudly.
Thine potion! Thou hath soured it! How dare thou pour blessed water into poison used upon the sinful! Thou blind fool!” Halahel’s angered voice filled the room, “sacrilege! Betrayal!”
“I come not for the sin of immortal life,” I shouted, “but to know the nature of your pact and break it!”
Thine pact is to keep the father of these grounds alive! As punishment for violating God’s law,” Halahel’s voice cried, “the father shall remain, here forever imprisoned and with everlasting life, passed from father to son!
I narrowed my eyes, “Such a pact requires more than one life.”
“The son gives unto thee many lives, by which I siphon essence to renew the pact!” the demon informed me, “Thou art yet another sacrifice.”
“Begone!” I shouted, “in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, I cast thee out, Halahel! Leave these revered grounds in peace!”
“Father, any luck over there?” Trevor questioned.
“I could use a bit, yes!” I shouted.
Trevor ran over, now far less affected by the miasma as I had countered it with the holy water, for now.
“Place your ring upon the jar!” I instructed him.
Trevor nodded, moving towards the jar.
Thy art not some simple demon to hurl to the underworld!” Halahel cried.
“Whatever buddy,” Trevor placed his ring upon the jar.
Ho!” the voice resonated, the ground shaking, “God’s blood hath bathed this iron! Thine purity is unmatched!”
I advanced towards the jar, “Begone vile disrupter of God’s law! I, a servant of God Almighty, break the chains of this pact, as God’s hammer upon the anvil of his creation!”
“Know thy pact is broken!” Halahel cried, a gray mist rising out of the jar, “but thy blessings shall all be gone and only thine curse remains while one stands upon thine hallowed ground!”
The jar’s metal began to pit and dent, followed by near-instant corrosion taking over the jar as it fell to the ground.
The bronze statue began to fall apart, bits of it falling off of the man’s face inside.
Eventually, the statue grew so weathered it crumbled to pieces, allowing the man to fall forward, gasping for air. He wore a light green formal jacket and tan slacks which was dated, matching the 1920s style of the statue. He had a thin mustache and greasy black hair. His bloodshot brown eyes looked at his well-manicured fingers as he flexed them, “I’m free?” He asked.
Trevor grabbed the man as the oil from the lamps began to leak, “yeah but let's see if we can keep it that way and get out of here alive, huh?” We all began to run towards the exit.
I ran after Trevor down the corridor. As we did, the old caskets that had appeared so well preserved now began to decay and break as we passed.
Some, which had their ends pointed too far out of the dirt, cracked, the once well-preserved bodies within rapidly decaying.
The scent of rot filled the air as we rushed towards the iron-barred gate that had been closed behind us at the end of the hallway.
It was clear the iron was rapidly rusting, pitting and the paint was peeling off the bars.
“I can’t get it opened!” Trisha shouted.
“Trevor, kick it!” I ordered.
“I tried that already!” I watched as the hinges grew more and more rust around the edges.
“Try it again!” I shouted.
Trevor grunted and heaved, giving a powerful kick to the lock.
It shattered and we pushed the rapidly aging gate open, rushing through it and up the stairs.
The stairs proved troublesome, even as we climbed them, some broke beneath our feet, causing me to slip at least twice.
The thin mustached man offered to help me to my feet a few times as we climbed, “Sorry about all of this, father!” he said, a look of concern on his face.
By the time we got to the mausoleum, it was as if we had exited at a different time period.
The ivy that once crawled up the walls was now half dead, hanging from the cracked walls, their gripping tendrils dried and brown.
Cracks formed on the walls and the stained glass was broken, leaving only an oval hole where the stained glass once was.
“Well,” Trevor cleared his throat, “clearly this place wasn’t a labor of love.”
Trisha frowned, looking to the man we had pulled out of the crypt, “Who is that?”
He turned to Trisha, lifting an eyebrow, “Alfonse, my dear, a pleasure to meet you.”
Trisha avoided the hand he offered.
“Been stuck down there for a very long time,” he smiled a disarming smile, “you wouldn’t by chance, know my son, Andrew, would you?”
“Yeah,” Trevor began, “we’re going to be looking for him too.”
Trevor headed out of the mausoleum, the rest of us in tow.
Andy was staring at the cemetery in shock, many of the tombstones now looked their appropriate ages.
“Andrew, my boy!” Alfonse smiled wide, approaching Andy.
“Father?!” Andy’s face dropped as Alfonse walked towards him, “t-they freed you! That was… exactly what I wanted! Finally! After all these years!”
Alfonse grew closer to Andy, pulling a monocle out of his pocket, “yes, it is nice to be free. Your visits were very nice but…” he took a deep breath, “I think I’d have preferred the iron lung, boy!” with that he grabbed Andy by the throat, lifting him up. “But Halahel was very generous to me, boy! He showed me so many wonderful things.”
Andy gasped, grabbing at his throat.
Trisha and Trevor rushed towards him.
“Hey drop him!” Trevor shouted.
“This doesn’t involve you, boy,” Alfonse knocked Trevor back with ease, grinning to Andy, “bet you’ve made a nice life for yourself boy, but I believe you owe me a full life, don’t you?”
I grabbed ahold of my rosary beads, putting the talisman of Saint Benedict in my palm and pressing it against the back of Alfonse’s neck.
Alfonse screamed, dropping Andy, “Damn you, preacher!”
“Run to the gate!” I shouted to Andy. I turned to Trisha, “you too!” I looked over the gate and noticed that there were two gates. The front gate was newer than the rest and was the only weathered thing in the cemetery when first arrived. This gave me an idea.
Andy rushed to the gateway, as did Trisha and Trevor.
Alfonse scoffed, “you foolish boy! Like I would let you leave!” He rushed after Andy.
I let out a sigh of relief as I watched Andy get a few feet from the newer front gate.
Alfonse scoffed, turning to me as he walked, “preacher, do you think that Halahel did not tell me of the stipulations of my eventual escape?” he laughed, moving to Andy and grabbing him by the throat once more, pushing him against the front gate, “I cannot leave the cemetery, so I’ll just suck the life out of all of you here,” he chuckled, “though I may leave one of you to fetch me others, as my son had done for years for his own benefit.”
“An evil plot,” I exclaimed, approaching Alfonse, standing near a stone walkway that, previously, had been pristine, but now had fallen to disrepair. “But your hubris has undone you.”
Alfonse coughed, then dropped Andy, his grip weakening. “What is this?”
Andy gasped, scurrying away from his father.
“Well you were not to leave the cemetery,” I pointed out, “but I think we need to establish, exactly, where the cemetery begins and ends,” I pointed to the stone path I stood on, “the original gate appears to have been here some time ago.”
Alfonse’s hair grew long and white, his hands withered and his clothing colors dimmed, “NO!” he shrieked.
“It seems a new gate was erected… oh just a few feet in front of the old one,” I remarked, “that would be why, when we got here, that gate had suffered the effects of time.”
Alfonse wheezed and fell back, his body turning to dust by the time it struck the ground.
I walked over to the body as the wind came to ferry the remains away, “Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.” I turned to Andy, who was looking far less of a strapping young man.
Andy now looked to easily be in his seventies, groaning and trying to crawl away.
“Your father’s curse sustained you as well,” I noted.
Trevor walked over to Andy and picked him up, holding his shoulder tightly.
Andy wheezed, wincing at Trevor’s rough treatment.
“You locked us down there, didn’t you?” Trisha accused.
Andy nodded, frowning.
“You made a pact with a demon, yes? Repent and you may find salvation,” I advised.
Andy narrowed his eyes, “father was dying. I studied the occult for years after the church could do nothing. That’s when I found writings on Halahel’s potion. It would bless the first drinker and damn anyone else.”
Trevor grumbled, “but demonic pacts come at a price.”
Trisha finished, “Daddy lived forever, but trapped in that bronze statue.”
Andy sighed, “yes. And if I trapped people down there, the miasma would kill them, and father and I could remain young.”
“So why call us?” I asked, “why call an exorcist?”
Andy sneered, “Because father was trying to get out… he grew more powerful… he was haunting me in my home, terrorizing my wife, my children, he was going to ruin everything!” he looked to his hand, shocked, “I wanted to finally break the damn pact, but I was too afraid to go down there and end up like one of the others.”
“Your victims?” I shook my head.
“So, what do we do with him?” Trisha asked.
“An excellent question,” I narrowed my eyes on Andy, “what do we do with a Warlock?”
submitted by Zithero to nosleep [link] [comments]


2020.08.24 02:51 llaverna Weekly Round-Up: August 17th - August 23rd

Weekly Round-Up: August 17th - August 23rd
/bangtan Weekly Round-Up
Previous thread: August 10th - August 16th
This round-up is for everything that happened in the /bangtan realm within the past week, compiled for your convenience! If you have feedback, please leave a comment or send me a PM.
The latest weekly round-up is linked on the sidebar of the subreddit. The link to the archive of past round-up posts can always be found in the wiki index.

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Date Link Thread
200821 BTS (방탄소년단) 'Dynamite' Official MV Thread

Megathreads

Date Thread
200821 Dynamite Compilation Gigathread
200820 Dynamite Comeback HYPE Thread
200821 Dynamite Achievements Megathread
200821 Dynamite SNS Mentions Megathread
200821 Dynamite English Press Coverage Megathread
200821 Dynamite - Song Information, Streaming Availability, and Single Discussion Megathread
200821 Dynamite Radio Play Megathread
200822 Dynamite US Interview Compilation

News & Information

Date Thread
200817 BTS are pre-recording their MTV VMA performance today
200817 Kyobo billboard has been changed from Run lyrics to You Never Walk Alone lyrics
200818 BTS Is #22 On Billboard's Money Maker: Highest Paid Musicians Of 2019 With Revenue $20.6mil, #3 Physical Sales #5 Sales Royalties
200819 j-hope donated 100 million won to the Green Umbrella Children’s Foundation to aid vulnerable children affected by the coronavirus pandemic
200819 Cover for upcoming issue of GQ Japan featuring BTS
200819 BTS’ new single ‘Dynamite,’ written by @dstewartmusic & @JessicaAgombar, has been approved by KBS to satisfy its broadcasting standards
200819 BTS wins all nominations in Power Radio Summer Awards 2020
200819 BTS was selected as the world's most “Global Sustainable Future Leader” for the 2nd time in a row
200820 BTS to perform "Stay Gold" and "MIC Drop" on Fuji TV's '2020 FNS Music Festival' on August 26 from 6:30PM - 11:03PM JST
200820 ARMY Bomb Ver.3 and 'Map of the Soul Special Edition' can now be connected to "IDOL" music video on Weverse
200821 The member's Spotify playlists have been refreshed for the fifth time with their favorite tracks
200821 Melon Playlist ‘BTS: What I’m Listening To’
200823 "In the SOOP" registered on KOMCA, all BTS members credited as songwriters and composers

Merchandise news

Date Thread
200817 DVD details for "BTS Japan Official Fanmeeting Vol.5 'Magic Shop'" released
200820 BTS DNA Merch is now available on WeverseShop - Pre-order until 26 Aug, 11:59 PM (KST)
200821 "Dynamite" vinyl, cassette and official merchandise is now available to preorder on Weverse Shop
200821 DYNAMITE Merchandise 2nd Pre-Order on Weverse Shop USA now open
200821 Dynamite Remixes now available for preorder on BTS US Shop
200821 Weverse Shop Global DYNAMITE Merchandise 2nd Pre-Order

Expired news

Date Thread
200817 There will be a #BTS 'Dynamite' single release online global press conference on 8/21 @ 10:30AM KST

Official Media

Type Date Link Thread
Episode 200818 [EPISODE] BTS (방탄소년단) @ 2019 SBS 가요대전 Thread
In the SOOP 200820 [PREVIEW] In the SOOP BTS ver. EP.1 Excited to Begin Thread
In the SOOP 200820 In the SOOP BTS ver. EP.1 Excited to Begin Thread
In the SOOP 200820 [In the SOOP BTS ver.] Official Clip - Ep.2 Thread
Live 200821 BTS (방탄소년단) 'Dynamite' Countdown Live Thread
Live 200821 [V LIVE] BTS Live : ‘Dynamite’ MV Commentary Thread
Photos 200822 Dynamite Remix Teaser Photo Thread
Photos 200822 BTS 'Dynamite' Official MV Photo Sketch Thread
Smeraldo 200822 Smeraldo Blog Update 10 Thread
Teaser 200817 [PREVIEW] BTS (방탄소년단) JAPAN OFFICIAL FANMEETING VOL.5 [MAGIC SHOP] DVD SPOT Thread
Teaser 200819 BTS (방탄소년단) 'Dynamite' Official Teaser Thread
Video 200822 BTS - ‘Dynamite' Official Lip Sync Guide Thread
Video 200823 BTS (방탄소년단) Sing 'Dynamite' with me Thread
Video 200823 BTS (방탄소년단) 7-Second Interviews Thread
Other 200817 Learn! KOREAN with BTS [EP.24] Seollal and Chuseok Thread
Other 200818 Serpentine Galleries: Our future is a beautiful image. Do it by BTS Thread

BTS Universe Story

Date Link Thread
200817 BTS Universe Story D-1 Thread
200817 BTS Universe Story now Available to Pre-Register on the Google Play Store Thread
200818 Video: [BTS Universe Story] Pre-register Now! Thread
200819 BTS Universe Story - Watch the video & help SeokJin decide what to do next Thread
200822 BTS Universe Story - Your story will become a star in our universe. Thread

Official SNS

Date SNS Link Thread
200817 Twitter BTS Official: Get ready for #BTS_Dynamite this Friday! Follow #BTS on @amazonmusic Thread
200818 Twitter Jimin Thread
200818 Twitter Namjoon Thread
200819 Twitter SUGA Thread
200819 Weverse Taehyung Thread
200820 Twitter What are your thoughts on Dynamite so far? Let us know in one word with "BTS Dynamite is ___" BTS will read your tweets! Thread
200821 Twitter Bangtan Thread
200821 Twitter Taehyung Thread
200821 Twitter SUGA Thread
200821 Twitter Today's BTS Thread
200822 Twitter Jimin Thread
200822 Instagram BTS Official Instagram story Thread
200822 Weverse Namjoon Thread
200822 Weverse Compilation
200823 TikTok Bangtan Thread

BTS Interviews

Date Link Thread
200819 USA TODAY Entertainment: BTS to release 'Dynamite,' their first entirely in English Thread
200821 Good Morning America: The Story of BTS Thread
200821 ET: BTS on How ARMY Has 'Inspired' Them Amid 'Rough Year' (Exclusive) Thread
200821 BTS on "Dynamite" with Zane Lowe on Apple Music's 'New Music Daily' Thread
200821 Zach Sang Show - BTS talks Dynamite, life in quarantine & the future of their music Video Thread
200821 MTV Viral Hits + EXCLUSIVE BTS Interview Livestream Thread
200821 GRAMMY - BTS Talk Inspiration Behind "Dynamite", New Album, Gratitude For ARMY & More Thread
200821 BTS Discuss Their New Song 'Dynamite' and its Music Video Thread
200821 extraTV - BTS Talks Life in Quarantine, VMAs Performance, and More Thread
200823 Radio Disney: BTS talks Dynamite with Liam McEwan Thread

CF & Partnerships

Date Thread
200817 BTS x Hyundai Lifestyle - j-hope
200817 BTS x Baskin Robbins
200817 BTS x Baskin Robbins - Vertical Focus Video💜 BTS Jin (Jin cam)
200817 FILA Korea x BTS: FILA Fall Collection
200818 BTS x Hyundai Lifestyle - Jin
200818 FILA Korea x BTS - SUGA #2
200818 BTS x Baskin Robbins - Vertical Focus Video💜 BTS RM (RM cam)
200819 FILA Korea x BTS - Jungkook #2
200819 BTS x Baskin Robbins - Vertical Focus Video 💜 BTS SUGA (SUGA cam)
200819 Bodyfriend
200820 BTS x FILA Korea - Jimin
200820 Baskin Robbins x BTS Bora Bora Cake on Instagram
200821 Samsung Canada (Twitter) special news at 9am
200821 Samsung Canada: We heard you, BTS ARMY! 💜 We’re excited to announce we’re bringing the Galaxy Buds+ BTS Edition to Canada.
200821 FILA FUSION
200822 Baskin Robbins Interview with Jin, Jhope and V
200823 BTS x Baskin Robbins Interview & Pick Videos (Jimin & Jungkook)

Articles

Date Publisher Article Thread
200817 Forbes BTS’s ‘Map Of The Soul: 7 - The Journey’ Blasts Back Onto Billboard 200, Reaching A New Peak Thread
200819 USA Today K-pop stars BTS tackle 'interesting kind of challenge' with first all-English song 'Dynamite' Thread
200820 Headline Planet BTS Sings About “Treasuring The Little Things” On New, Joyous Single “Dynamite” Thread
200821 Rolling Stone BTS’ New Song ‘Dynamite’ Is a Contender for Song of the Summer Thread

SNS Mentions

Date Link Thread
200817 Fall Guys Thread
200817 iHeartRadio: Guess what!!! You could win a virtual meet and greet with BTS at our 2020 #iHeartFestival! Thread
200818 iHeartRadio: We’re back with a new contest! Tweet us your favorite BTS memory using #iHeartDynamite + #iHeartDay2Contest to enter! Thread
200819 Taj Jackson Thread
200819 Erik Nam talking about BTS on K-pop Daebak Thread
200819 David Stewart Thread
200819 Labrinth using the Dynamite filter Thread
200820 Ralphie Aversa: BTS interview coming soon on USA Today Thread
200820 one of the writers for Dynamite, @JessicaAgombar, tweets lyrics from teaser "Shining through the city with a little funk and soul" Thread
200822 Columbia Records: Join the “Dynamite” #LipSyncParty! Thread
200823 Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus (Director-General of the World Health Organization) inviting BTS to the next World Health Assembly Thread

Other media

NOTE: Entries with 💜 have new content directly involving BTS
Type 💜 Date Link Thread
Cover 200821 Dynamite - BTS (Cover By New Hope Club) Thread
Video 200819 'K-Pop Lyric Guide' with Kim Taewon and WINNER Kang Seungyoon Ep. 1: BTS (Spring Day) Thread
Video 200821 KISS 92.5: Daryn Jones and Deepa Prashad have all the details you need to know about Dynamite before it drops! Thread
Video 200821 [Reupload] BTS(방탄소년단) - SOLO STAGE [The 2018 KBS Song Festival / 2018.12.28] Thread
Video 💜 200821 BTS x GQ JAPAN ft. Behind The Scenes Photoshoot Video Thread
Video 200817 Ryan Tedder states possible future song with BTS on Zach Sang Show Thread
Video 💜 200822 BTS Announce MRL Ask Anything September ? Thread
Video 200823 Anthony Fantano (theneedledrop) reviews Dynamite Thread
Other 💜 200822 Scans of BTS for GQ Japan (October edition) Thread

Milestones

Type Date Thread
Charts/Sales 200816 My Time' by BTS has reached 100 #1's on iTunes
Charts/Sales 200817 "Dynamite" has now surpassed 500,000 pre-order sales in 6 hours on Chinese music platform Netease, already BTS’ best-selling Single in the platform’s history
Charts/Sales 200817 BTS's Map of the Soul: 7 - The Journey become their first Japanese album to hit the Billboard 200 Top 14
Charts/Sales 200820 Agust D's "Daechwita" has now sold over 100,000 units in the US
Followers 200816 BTS's Official Twitter Account Has Surpassed 28 MILLION Followers
Followers 200823 BANGTANTV Channel Has Surpassed 35 MILLION YouTube Subscribers (BTS becomes the first boy group to achieve this)
Likes 200821 BTS is now the the First & Only act in YouTube history to have 4 Music Videos with over 13 MILLION likes (Boy With Luv, DNA, Fake Love, IDOL)
Streams 200819 BTS's "MIC Drop (Steve Aoki Remix) [Full Length Edition]" has now surpassed 100 MILLION streams on Spotify
Streams 200819 BTS is the most streamed artist in Spotify Russia one month after launch
Views 200819 'Dynamite' Official Teaser has surpassed 10 million views on Youtube
Views 200819 BTS 'Dynamite' Teaser MV Has Surpassed 20mil Views, Also Their First Teaser To Achieve This Within 24hrs
Views 200819 Dynamite MV Teaser becomes @BTS_twt's first & fastest teaser to hit 30 MILLION views in the first day of release!
Views 200820 BTS 'Dynamite' Official Teaser Become The Fastest MV Teaser To Surpass 40mil Views
Views 200822 "Boy With Luv (feat. Halsey)" has now surpassed 900 million views on YouTube
Views 200821 BTS's 'Dynamite' Breaks Youtube Record for Most-Viewed Video in First 24 Hours
Views 200822 BTS's 'Stay Gold' Official MV has now hit over 100 MILLION views on YouTube
Views 200822 Youtube confirms that BTS' 'Dynamite' breaks Youtube Premiere records with over 3 million peak concurrents
Views 200823 BTS just broke another new record by debuting its new English single "Dynamite" as the most viewed vid on YT in 24 hrs with over 101.1m views.
Other 200819 'BTS Party' playlist has hit over 1 million likes & pre-saves ahead of Dynamite's release!

TinyTAN

Date Thread
200819 TinyTAN:What's different? This is different! #lookdevelopment

BT21

Date Link Thread
200814 UNIVERSTAR BT21 has returned to ZEPETO to spread love all over the galaxy💜 Thread
200820 [With BTS] BT21 UNIVERSE 3 Epic Moments - Highlights Compilation Thread

BT21 merchandise news

Date Thread
200818 New BT21 Baby merch at YesStyle - sticker patches, wallets, and totes!
200821 LINE FRIENDS COLLECTION BT21 Baby Bubble Tea Doll, BT21 Figurine Keyring & Magnet

Misc

Date Thread
200819 [Giveaway - Worldwide] MOTS:7 Album
200820 [Throwback] Six years ago today, BTS released "Dark & Wild" and music video for title track "Danger"
200820 New Intro to BTS Video
200821 US Armys you can buy Dynamite with the help of funds from FundsforBangtan
200823 Make sure to redeem ALL of your MP3 pre-orders so they count for the Billboard chart!

Subreddit

Rolling /bangtan Awards 2020 nomination form

Community posts

Top Discussion Posts

  1. [+111] Guy looking to connect more with his BTS Army girlfriend
  2. [+110] Next album's title track
  3. [+94] Any hobbies/interests the members have that surprised you when you first found out?
  4. [+86] Is there any BTS era you would like to relive or experience?
  5. [+85] Dynamite Spotify Streaming Playlists - a megathread!

Weekly threads

Fanart

Past week's top 5 fanart posts from our sister subreddit, /heungtan!
Submitter Thread
themaroonraccoon My mom became a huge fan over the last year! Here’s her coffee bean portrait of the boys!
AUOGil82 Drawing of Yoongi~ ♪( ´▽`)
lilytingpan TK’s cute dance moment 🥺
kieuthenerd My cousin made me a BT21 cake for my 30th birthday 🎉
noticemesenpai23 Jimin’s smirk from dynamite mv 🥺
submitted by llaverna to bangtan [link] [comments]


2020.08.23 21:01 aletheran 29 [M4F] Scotland UK/Anywhere -Witty Title

Hello there!
I have no idea how to start this off, so; I'll start typing and see what comes out.
Last year I found myself single for the first time in a decade and just when I felt like I had taken enough time to embrace being me, work on myself and start thinking about dating - lockdown struck, putting any idea of that on hold. So, here I go putting myself forward and into this brave new world of dating. Let's see how it goes!
My name is Alasdair, I'm 29, and from the Highlands of bonnie Scotland. I'm looking to meet a lassie, to get to know with the view of it developing into a long term relationship.
I'm 5' 9" with green eyes, light brown hair and I weigh around 88kg. I'm currently working on losing weight (as are 90% of the population it seems) and I have a bit of a babyface. I've lost count over the years how many times people have said to me: "No way! You look way younger than -insert age at time of comment-!"
I'm not going to go into my personality, as honestly, I don't think I can be objective; so instead I'll share some info about my interests and my life.
I spent a short amount of time living in and travelling across Scandinavia when I finished Secondary School. I've also lived in various places in Scotland in the decade since.
I work as a Woodland Officer working for an organisation that looks after the forested landscape; this means I spend a fair chunk of my worktime split between being stuck behind a desk and being released to the great outdoors.
I've been lucky enough to see some truly amazing places across Scotland, which I would love to share with someone willing to go on an adventure every so often! I'm also entering the final year of my studies, as I decided to go into uni as a mature student.
I'm a bit of a homebody, and due to having a relatively active job, I tend to spend my evenings (and sometimes weekends) furthering one of my many geeky hobbies. I enjoy reading, writing, watching movies, playing videogames on my pc or ps4, painting miniatures, listening to music or audiobooks as well as playing guitar (though not as much as I should).
I like comedies such as Black Books, Mitchel and Webb Look, Father Ted, the IT Crowd, Still Game (of course!), Scrubs and Brooklyn 99.
When it comes to films, I enjoy things like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Jurrasic Park, The Princess Bride, Hot Fuzz, Pan's Labyrinth, Jojo Rabbit and What We Do In The Shadows. Though I don't watch Anime as much these days; Studio Ghibli films will always have a special place in my heart, with Princess Mononoke being my favourite.
I'm a fan of RPG series like Mass Effect, The Witcher, Dragon Age, The Elder Scrolls, Divinity, Dark Souls, Divinity and Stardew Valley. Most of the games I play these days are multiplayer, so I get to enjoy spending time with my friends.
I also enjoy outdoor activities, such as walking my dog (pics of my pets), cycling, backpacking, camping or getting out in my canoe. I love being in nature, travelling to new places and generally trying to make the most of life while I can. I also enjoy taking photographs - of which a small selection that you can find here, if you're interested.
I love going to the theatre and experiencing live performances; there's nothing like seeing a play, musical or film adaptation. The last show I went to see was an adaptation of the movie Amélie, which was brilliant! I also like going to art galleries, museums and historical sites, both urban and remote.
Well, I feel like I've rambled on enough. If any of this has piqued your interest and you fancy having a chat or playing a game and would like to get to know each other, send me a message :) I'm looking forward to hearing from you!
To any of you who made it this far: thanks for taking the time to read what turned out to be a bit of an essay!
Oh, I almost forgot; here's a photo of my ugly mug!
submitted by aletheran to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]


2020.08.22 12:19 EnclavedMicrostate Tartaria: The Supposed Mega-Empire of Inner Eurasia

Introduction

For those not in the know, the Tartaria conspiracy theory is one of the most bizarre pieces of pseudo history out there. Its core notion is that the region known as ‘Tartaria’ or ‘Grand Tartary’ in Early Modern European maps was not simply a vague geographical designate, but in fact a vast, centralised empire. Said empire emerged… at some point, and it disappeared… at some point, but for… some reason, its existence has been covered up to suit… some narrative or another. As you can tell, there’s a lot of diverse ideas here, and the fact that there hasn’t been the equivalent of a Christological schism every time a controversial thread goes up is really quite impressive. While this post will primarily address one particular piece of writing that is at the core of Tartaria conspiracy theorising, I’ll include a few tidbits to show you just how much madness its adherents have come up with. But first, some background.

State of Play, and why I’m doing this

The Tartaria theory has a small but active following on subreddits such as Tartaria, tartarianarchitecture, and CulturalLayer, which as of writing have around 5,300, 2,400 and 23,000 subscribers, respectively, but it’s clear from the 8 questions on the topic asked at AskHistorians since January 2019 and this debunk request from June that it’s a theory that has somewhat broad appeal and can reach beyond its core niche. This is unsurprising given how little education most people in the West receive about basically anything east of Greece: simply put, the reality of Eurasian history is just not something most of us are taught. And if we don’t know the reality of Eurasian history to begin with, or if we do then it's all in bits and pieces where we might not even know a basic set of dates and names, then what seems to be a pretty developed narrative about a lost empire actually turns out rather plausible.
Unfortunately, many debunks of the Tartaria narrative come from people pushing competing conspiracy theories, like this guy claiming that there’s a global Jewish Phoenecian conspiracy and that Tartaria is simply rehashing the notion that Khazars were Jews in order to distract from the real Phoenecian threat at the heart of global society or some nonsense like that. (I don’t really care, I died of laughter after page 3.) Now, there are those coming from serious perspectives, but they focus largely on the problems with Tartaria as a concept rather than addressing the more specific claims being made. This is of course valuable in its own right (shoutout to Kochevnik81 for their responses to the AskHistorians threads), but we can go deeper by really striking at the roots of this ‘theory’ – what is the ‘evidence’ they’re presenting? But to do that, we need to find out what the origins of the ‘theory' are, and thus what its linchpins are. Incidentally, it is because of some recent events regarding those origins that I’ve been finally prompted to write this post.

Where does it come from?

My attempts to find the exact origins of the Tartaria conspiracy have been not entirely fruitful, as the connections I’ve found have been relatively circumstantial at best. But as far as I can tell, it at least partially originates with that Russian pseudohistorian we all know and love, Anatoly Fomenko. Fomenko is perhaps best known in the English-speaking world for his 7-volume ‘epic’ from 2002, History: Fiction or Science?, but in fact he’s been pushing a complete ‘New Chronology’ since the publication of Novaia khronologia in Russian in 1995. While the New Chronology is best known for its attempt to explain away most of the Middle Ages as a hoax created by the Papacy on the basis of bad astronomy, it also asserts a number of things about Russian history from the Kievan Rus’ to the Romanovs. Key to the Tartaria theory is its claim that there was a vast Slavo-Turkic ‘Russian Horde’ based out of ‘Tartaria’ which dominated Eurasia until the last ‘Horde’ ruler, Boris Godunov, was overthrown by the European Mikhail Romanov. This, of course, is a clear attempt at countering the notion of a ‘Tatar Yoke’ over Russia, as you can’t have a ‘Tatar Yoke’ if the Tatars were Russians all along. Much as I’d like to explain that in more detail here, I don’t have to: in 2004, Konstantin Sheiko at the University of Wollongong wrote an entire PhD thesis looking at the claims of Fomenko’s New Chronology and contextualising them within currents of Russian nationalism, which can be accessed online.
But I personally suspect that if there are Fomenko connections as far as Tartaria specifically is concerned, they are limited. For one, at one stage users on the Tartaria subreddit seemed unfamiliar with Fomenko, and there are those arguing that Fomenko had ‘rewritten’ Tartarian history to be pro-Russian. This is why I said that the evidence was circumstantial. The only other link to Fomenko is indirect: the CulturalLayer sidebar lists the ‘New Chronology Resource Collection’ and the audiobook of History: Fiction or Science? under ‘Essential Resources’, and Tartaria in its ‘Related Subs’.
As far as I can tell, the ultimate origin of its developed form on the Anglophone web traces back to this post on the StolenHistory forums, posted on 17 April 2018. This makes some chronological sense: only one post on CulturalLayer that mentions Tartaria predates this. Moreover, KorbenDallas, the OP of the thread, was also the forum’s chief admin, and given that StolenHistory is still (as of writing) the top resource on CulturalLayer’s sidebar, that suggests significant influence. However, using the search function on camas.reddit.io, it was mentioned at least 9 times before then, with the first mention, on 10 January 2018, mentioning that the ‘theory’ had been doing the rounds on the Russian web for at least 5 years. Nevertheless, as the detail in these early comments is sparse and generally refers only to speculation about maps, it is probably fair to say that the first in-depth English-language formulation of the Tartaria ‘theory’ was thus the April 2018 forum post. Funnily enough, it is not cited often on Tartaria, but that subreddit was created on 27 December, long after discussion had been taking place on places like CulturalLayer, and combined with the ‘mudflood’ ‘theory’ and the notion of giant humans, which are not significant features of the StolenHistory thread. This more convoluted and multifaceted version of the Tartaria theory doesn’t really have a single-document articulation, hence me not covering it here.
It is this StolenHistory thread which I will be looking at here today. Not just because it seems to be at the heart of it all, but also because it got shut down around 36 hours ago as of writing this post, based on the timestamps of panicked ‘what happened to StolenHistory’ posts on CulturalLayer and Tartaria. So what better occasion to go back to the Wayback Machine’s version, seeing as it’s now quite literally impossible to brigade the source? Now as I’ve said, this is not the most batshit insane it gets for the Tartaria crowd, in fact it’s incredibly tame. But by the end of it, I bet you’ll be thinking ‘if this is mild, how much more worse is the modern stuff!?’ And the best part is, I can debunk most of it without recourse to any other sources at all, because so much of it involves them posting sources out of context or expecting them to be read tendentiously.
But that’s enough background. Let us begin.

Part 1: The Existence

Exhibit 1: The Encylcopædia Britannica, 1771

”Tartary, a vast country in the northern parts of Asia, bounded by Siberia on the north and west: this is called Great Tartary. The Tartars who lie south of Muscovy and Siberia, are those of Astracan, Circassia, and Dagistan, situated north-west of the Caspian-sea; the Calmuc Tartars, who lie between Siberia and the Caspian-sea; the Usbec Tartars and Moguls, who lie north of Persia and India; and lastly, those of Tibet, who lie north-west of China.” - Encyclopædia Britannica, Vol. III, Edinburgh, 1771, p. 887.
Starting a post about the ‘hidden’ history of Central Asia with an encyclopædia entry from Scotland is really getting off to a good start, isn’t it? Anyone with a sense of basic geography can tell you that Tibet lies due west of China, not northwest. But more importantly, this shows you how single-minded the Tartaria advocates are and how tendentiously they read things. ‘Country’ need not actually refer to a state entity, it can just be a geographical space, especially in more archaic contexts such as this. Moreover, the ethnographic division of the ‘Tartars’ into Astrakhanis, Circassians, Dagestanis, Kalmuks, Uzbeks, and, for whatever reason, Tibetans, pretty clearly goes against the notion of a unified Tartary.
Now compare to the description given by Wikipedia, ”Tartary (Latin: Tartaria) or Great Tartary (Latin: Tartaria Magna) was a name used from the Middle Ages until the twentieth century to designate the great tract of northern and central Asia stretching from the Caspian Sea and the Ural Mountains to the Pacific Ocean, settled mostly by Turko-Mongol peoples after the Mongol invasion and the subsequent Turkic migrations.”
Obviously, Wikipedia is not a good source for… anything, really, but the fact that they’re giving a 349-year-old encyclopaedia primacy over the summary sentence of a wiki article is demonstrative of how much dishonesty is behind this. And it only gets worse from here.

Exhibit 2: Hermann Moll’s A System of Geography, 1701

THE Country of Tartary, call'd Great Tartary, to distinguish it from the Lesser, in Europe, has for its Boundaries, on the West, the Caspian Sea, and Moscovitick Tartary; on the North, the Scythian, or Tartarian Sea; on the East, the Sea of the Kalmachites, and the Straight of Jesso; and on the South, China, India, or the Dominions of the great Mogul and Persia : So that it is apparently the largest Region of the whole Continent of Asia, extending it self [sic] farthest, both towards the North and East: In the modern Maps, it is plac'd within the 70th and 170th Degree of Longitude, excluding Muscovitick Tartary; as also between the 40 and 72 Degree of Northern Latitude.
Immediately underneath the scan of this text is the statement, clearly highlighted, that
Tartary was not a tract. It was a country.
Hmm, very emphatic there. Except wait no, the same semantic problem recurs. ‘Country’ need not mean ‘state’. Moreover, in the very same paragraph, Moll (or rather his translator) refers to Tartary as a ‘Region’, which very much disambiguates the idea. Aside from that, it is telling that Moll refers to three distinct ‘Tartaries’: ’Great Tartary’ in Asia, ‘Lesser Tartary’ in Europe, and ‘Muscovite Tartary’ – that is, the eastern territories of the Russian Tsardom. If, as they are saying, ‘Great Tartary’ was a coherent entity, whatever happened to ‘Lesser Tartary’?

Exhibit 3: A 1957 report by the CIA on ‘National Cultural Development Under Communism’

Is a conspiracy theorist… actually believing a CIA document? Yep. I’ll add some context later that further complicates the issue.
Or let us take the matter of history, which, along with religion, language and literature, constitute the core of a people’s cultural heritage. Here again the Communists have interfered in a shameless manner. For example, on 9 August 1944, the Central Committee of the Communist Party, sitting in Moscow, issued a directive ordering the party’s Tartar Provincial Committee “to proceed to a scientific revolution of the history of Tartaria, to liquidate serious shortcomings and mistakes of a nationalistic character committed by individual writers and historians in dealing with Tartar history.” In other words, Tartar history was to be rewritten—let its be frank, was to be falsified—in order to eliminate references to Great Russian aggressions and to hide the facts of the real course of Tartar-Russian relations.
[similar judgement on Soviet rewriting of histories of Muslim areas to suit a pro-Russian agenda]
What’s fascinating about the inclusion of this document is that it is apparently often invoked as a piece of anti-Fomenko evidence, by tying New Chronology in with older Russian-nationalist Soviet revisionism. So not only is it ironic that they’re citing a CIA document, of all things, but a CIA document often used to undermine the spiritual founder of the whole Tartaria ‘theory’ in the first place! But to return to the point, the fundamental issue is that it’s tendentious. This document from 1957 obviously is not going to be that informed on the dynamics of Central Asian ethnicity and history in the way that a modern scholar would be.
In a broader sense, what this document is supposed to prove is that Soviet coverups are why we don’t know about Tartaria. But if most of the evidence came from Western Europe to begin with, why would a Soviet coverup matter? Why wasn’t Tartarian history deployed as a counter-narrative during the Cold War?

Exhibit 4: ‘An 1855 Source’

This is from a footnote in Sir George Cornwalle Lewis’ An Inquiry into the Credibility of the Early Roman History, citing a travelogue by Evariste Huc that had been published in French in 1850 and was soon translated into English. From the digitised version of of Huc’s book on Project Gutenberg (emphasis copied over from the thread):
Such remains of ancient cities are of no unfrequent occurrence in the deserts of Mongolia; but everything connected with their origin and history is buried in darkness. Oh, with what sadness does such a spectacle fill the soul! The ruins of Greece, the superb remains of Egypt,—all these, it is true, tell of death; all belong to the past; yet when you gaze upon them, you know what they are; you can retrace, in memory, the revolutions which have occasioned the ruins and the decay of the country around them. Descend into the tomb, wherein was buried alive the city of Herculaneum,—you find there, it is true, a gigantic skeleton, but you have within you historical associations wherewith to galvanize it. But of these old abandoned cities of Tartary, not a tradition remains; they are tombs without an epitaph, amid solitude and silence, uninterrupted except when the wandering Tartars halt, for a while, within the ruined enclosures, because there the pastures are richer and more abundant.
There’s a paraphrase from Lewis as well, but you can just read it on the thread. The key thing here is that yes, there were abandoned settlements in the steppe. Why must this be indicative of a lost sedentary civilisation, and not instead the remnants of political capitals of steppe federations which were abandoned following those federations’ collapse? Places like Karakorum, Kubak Zar, Almaliq and Sarai were principally built around political functions, being centres for concentration of religious and ritual authority (especially monasteries) and stores of non-movable (or difficult to move) wealth. But individual examples of abandoned settlements are not evidence of broad patterns of settlement that came to be abandoned en masse. Indeed, the very fact that the cited shepherd calls the abandoned location ‘The Old Town’ in the singular implies just how uncommon such sites were – for any given region, there might really only be one of note.

Exhibit 5: Ethnic characteristics in artistic depictions of Chinggis and Timur

I… don’t quite know what to make of these.
Today, we have certain appearance related stereotypes. I think we are very much off there. It looks like Tartary was multi-religious, and multi-cultural. One of the reasons I think so is the tremendous disparity between what leaders like Genghis Khan, Batu Khan, Timur aka Tamerlane looked like to the contemporary artists vs. the appearance attributed to them today.
Ummm, what?
These are apparently what they look like today. These are ‘contemporary’ depictions of Chinggis:
Except, as the guy posting the thread says, these are 15th-18th century depictions… so NOT CONTEMPORARY.
As for Timur, we have:
In what bizzaro world are these contemporary?
We’ll get to Batur Khan in a moment because that’s its own kettle of worms. But can this user not recognise that artists tend to depict things in ways that are familiar? Of course white European depictions of Chinggis and Timur will tend to make them look like white Europeans, while East Asian depictions of Chinggis will tend to make him look Asian, and Middle Eastern depictions of Chinggis and Timur will make them look Middle Eastern. This doesn’t prove that ‘Tartaria’ was multicultural, in fact it you’d have an easier time using this ‘evidence’ to argue that Chinggis and Timur were shapeshifters who could change ethnicities at will!

Exhibit 6: Turkish sculptures

Why this person thinks modern Turkish sculptures are of any use to anyone baffles me. The seven sculptures shown are of Batu Khan (founder of the ‘Golden Horde’/Jochid khanates), Timur, Bumin (founder of the First Turkic Khaganate), Ertugrul (father of Osman, the founder of the Ottoman empire), Babur (founder of the Mughal Empire), Attila the Hun, and Kutlug Bilge Khagan (founder of the Uyghur Khaganate). They are accompanied (except in the case of Ertugrul) by the dates of the empires/confederations that they founded – hence, for instance, Babur’s dates being 1526 to 1858, the lifespan of the Mughal Empire, or Timur’s being 1368 (which seems arbitrary) to 1507 (the fall of Herat to the Shaybanids). To quote the thread:
A few of them I do not know, but the ones I do look nothing like what I was taught at school. Also dates are super bizarre on those plaques.
Again, Turkish sculptors make Turkic people look like Turks. Big surprise. And the dates are comprehensible if you just take a moment to think.
Do Turks know something we don't?
Turkish, evidently.

Exhibit 7: A map from 1652 that the user can’t even read

The other reason why I think Tartary had to be multi-religious, and multi-cultural is its vastness during various moments in time. For example in 1652 Tartary appears to have control over the North America.
https://web.archive.org/web/20200701065421im_/https://www.stolenhistory.org/attachments/1652-nova-totius-terrarum-orbis-geographica-ac-hydrographica-tabula_1-1-jpg.37277/
This speaks for itself.
The thread was later edited to include a link to a post on ‘Tartarians’ in North America made on 7 August 2018, but that’s beside the point here, read at your own leisure (if you can call it ‘leisure’). Except for the part where at one point he admits he can’t read Latin, and so his entire theory in that post is based on the appearance of the word ‘Tartarorum’ in an unspecified context on a map of North America.

Part 2: The Coverup

The official history is hiding a major world power which existed as late as the 19th century. Tartary was a country with its own flag, its own government and its own place on the map. Its territory was huge, but somehow quietly incorporated into Russia, and some other countries. This country you can find on the maps predating the second half of the 19th century.
…Okay then.

Exhibit 8: Google Ngrams

https://web.archive.org/web/20200701065421im_/https://www.stolenhistory.org/attachments/tartary_ngram-jpg.37276/
This screenshot shows that the use of ‘Tartary’ and ‘Tartaria’ declined significantly over time. This is apparently supposed to surprise us. Or maybe it shows that we actually understand the region better…

Part 1a: Back to the existence

You know, a common theme with historical conspiracy theories is how badly they’re laid out, in the literal sense of the layout of their documents and video content. Don’t make a header called ‘The Coverup’ and then only have one thing before jumping back to the evidence for the existence again.

Exhibit 9: A Table

Yet, some time in the 18th century Tartary Muskovite was the biggest country in the world: 3,050,000 square miles.
https://web.archive.org/web/20200701065421im_/https://www.stolenhistory.org/attachments/tartary_huge-13-jpg.37329/
I do not have enough palms to slap into my face. Do they not understand that this is saying how much of Tartary was owned… by foreign powers?

Exhibit 10: Book covers

You can look at the images on the thread itself but here’s a few highlights:
Histories of the Qing conquest of China, because as far as Europeans were concerned the Manchus were Tartars. Proof of Tartaria because…?
An ambassador who never set foot in ‘Tartary’ itself, cool cool, very good evidence there.
There’s also three screenshots from books that aren’t even specifically named, so impossible to follow up. Clearly this is all we need.

Exhibit 11: Maps

The maps are the key think the Tartaria pushers use. All these maps showing ‘Grand Tartary’ or ‘Tartaria’ or what have you. There’s 20 of these here and you can look for yourselves, but the key thing is: why do these people assume that this referred to a single state entity? Because any of these maps that include the world more generally will also present large parts of Africa in generic terms, irrespective of actual political organisation in these regions. And many of the later maps clearly show the tripartite division of the region into ‘Chinese Tartary’, ‘Russian Tartary’, and ‘Independent Tartary’, which you think would be clear evidence that most of this region was controlled by, well, the Chinese (really, the Manchus) and the Russians. And many of these maps aren’t even maps of political organisation, but geographical space. See how many lump all of mainland Southeast Asia into ‘India’. Moreover, the poor quality of the mapping should give things away. This one for instance is very clear on the Black Sea coast, but the Caspian is a blob, and moreover, a blob that’s elongated along the wrong axis! They’re using Western European maps as an indicator of Central Asian realities in the most inept way possible, and it would be sad if it weren’t so hilarious. The fact that the depictions of the size of Tartaria are incredibly inconsistent also seems not to matter.

Exhibit 12: The Tartarian Language

There’s an 1849 American newspaper article referring to the ‘Tartarian’ language, which is very useful thank you, and definitely not more reflective of American ignorance than actual linguistic reality.
The next one is more interesting, because it’s from a translation of some writing by a French Jesuit, referring to the writing of Manchu, and who asserted (with very little clear evidence) that it could be read in any direction. In April last year, Tartaria users [claimed to have stumbled on a dictionary of Tartarian and French](np.reddit.com/Tartaria/comments/bi3aph/tartarian_language_dictionary/) called the Dictionnaire Tartare-Mantchou-François. What they failed to realise is that the French generally called the Manchus ‘Tartare-Mantchou’, and this was in fact a Manchu-French dictionary. In other words, a [Tartare-Mantchou]-[François] dictionary, not a [Tartare]-[Mantchou]-[François] dictionary. It is quite plausible, in fact probable, that the ‘Tartarian’ referred to in the newspaper article was Manchu.

Exhibit 13: Genealogies of Tartarian Kings

Descended From Genghiscan
Reads the comment above this French chart. How the actual hell did OP not recognise that ‘Genghiscan’ is, erm, Genghis Khan? Is it that hard to understand that maybe, just maybe, ‘Tartars’ was what they called Mongols back in the day, and ‘Tartaria’ the Mongol empire and its remnants?

Exhibit 14: Ethnographic drawings

These prove that there were people called Tartars, not that there was a state of Tartaria. NEXT

Exhibit 15: Tartaria’s alleged flag

Images they provide include
https://web.archive.org/web/20200701065421im_/https://www.stolenhistory.org/attachments/tartary_flags-11-jpg.37367/
https://web.archive.org/web/20200701065421im_/https://www.stolenhistory.org/attachments/tartary_flag_6-jpg.37307/
Except there’s one problem. As any EU4 player will tell you, that’s the flag of the Khanate of Kazan. And while they can trot out a few 18th and 19th century charts showing the apparent existence of a Tartarian naval flag, the inconvenient fact that Tartaria would have been landlocked seems not to get in the way. To be sure, their consistent inclusion is odd, given the non-existence of Tartary as a country, and moreover its landlocked status. It seems plausible that the consistent similarity of the designs is just a result of constant copying and poor checking, but on its own it means relatively little.

Exhibit 16: 19th-century racism

https://web.archive.org/web/20200701065421im_/https://www.stolenhistory.org/attachments/flags_of_all_nations_1865-mongolian-1-jpg.37369/
That I think speaks for itself.

Exhibit 17: Flags of Moscow on one particular chart

It is also worth mentioning that in the British Flag Table of 1783, there are three different flags listed as a flag of the Tsar of Moscow. There is also an Imperial Flag of Russia as well as multiple naval flags. And all of them are proceeded by a flag of the Viceroy of Russia.
By that logic, the Royal Navy ran Britain because the Royal Navy ensigns precede the Union Jack. It’s simply a conscious decision to show the flags of individuals before the flags of states. The ‘Viceroy’ (unsure what the original Russian title would be) and ‘Czar’ of Muscovy would presumably be, well, the Emperor of Russia anyway, so as with the British section where the Royal Standard and the flags of naval officers came first, the same seems true of Russia. Also, as a side note, the placement of the USA at the end, after the Persians, the Mughals and ‘Tartarians’, is a fun touch.
Significance of the Viceroy is in the definition of the term. A viceroy is a regal official who runs a country, colony, city, province, or sub-national state, in the name of and as the representative of the monarch of the territory. Our official history will probably say that it was the Tsar of Russia who would appoint a viceroy of Moscow. I have reasons to doubt that.
Why is the flag of the Viceroy of Moscow positioned prior to any other Russian flag? Could it be that the Viceroy of Moscow was superior to its Czar, and was "supervising" how this Tartarian possession was being run?
No.

Part 3: 1812

This, this is where it gets really bonkers. A key part of this post is arguing that Napoleon’s invasion of Russia was a cover story for a joint invasion against Tartaria gone horrendously wrong. All the stops are being pulled out here.
There is a growing opinion in Russia that French invasion of Russia played out according to a different scenario. The one where Tsar Alexander I, and Napoleon were on the same side. Together they fought against Tartary. Essentially France and Saint Petersburg against Moscow (Tartary). And there is a strong circumstantial evidence to support such a theory.
Oh yes, we’re going there.
Questions to Answer:
1. Saint Petersburg was the capitol of Russia. Yet Napoleon chose to attack Moscow. Why?
He didn’t, he was trying to attack the Russian army. (credit to dandan_noodles).
2. It appears that in 1912 there was a totally different recollection of the events of 1812. How else could you explain commemorative 1912 medals honoring Napoleon?
Because it’s a bit of an in-your-face to Napoleon for losing so badly?
And specifically the one with Alexander I, and Napoleon on the same medal. The below medal says something similar to, "Strength is in the unity: will of God, firmness of royalty, love for homeland and people"
Yeah, it’s showing Alexander I beating Napoleon, and a triumphant double-headed Russian eagle above captured French standards. Also, notice how Alexander is in full regalia, while Napoleon’s is covered up by his greatcoat?
3. Similarity between Russian and French uniforms. There are more different uniforms involved, but the idea remains, they were ridiculously similar.
Ah yes, because fashions in different countries always develop separately, and never get influenced by each other.
How did they fight each other in the dark?
With difficulty, presumably.
Basically, he’s saying that this: https://web.archive.org/web/20200701065421im_/https://www.stolenhistory.org/attachments/1_rus-jpg.37322/
Is too similar to this: https://web.archive.org/web/20200701065421im_/https://www.stolenhistory.org/attachments/1_rus-jpg.37322/
To be coincidental.
OK, whatever. Here’s where it gets interesting:
There was one additional combat asset officially available to Russians in the war of 1812. And that was the Militia. It does appear that this so-called Militia, was in reality the army of Tartary fighting against Napoleon and Alexander I.
Russian VolunteeMilitia Units... Tartarians?
Clearly this man has never encountered the concept of a cossack, an opelchenie, or, erm, a GREATCOAT.
4. Russian nobility in Saint Petersburg spoke French well into the second half of the 19th century. The general explanation was, that it was the trend of time and fashion. Google contains multiple opinions on the matter. * Following the same logic, USA, Britain and Russia should've picked up German after the victory in WW2.
Clearly never heard of the term lingua franca then.
5. This one I just ran into: 19th-century fans were totally into a Napoleon/Alexander romance
https://web.archive.org/web/20200701065421im_/https://www.stolenhistory.org/attachments/treaties_of_tilsit_miniature_-france-_1810s-_side_a-jpg.37314/
https://web.archive.org/web/20200701065421im_/https://www.stolenhistory.org/attachments/napoleonxalexander2-jpg.37310/
https://web.archive.org/web/20200701065421im_/https://www.stolenhistory.org/attachments/napoleon-alexander-jpg.37312/
It is true that after the Treaty of Tilsit, Napoleon wrote to his wife, Josephine, that
I am pleased with [Emperor] Alexander; he ought to be with me. If he were a woman, I think I should make him my mistress.
But Napoleon’s ‘honeymoon period’ with Russia following the Treaty of Tilsit should not be seen as indicative of a permanent Napoleonic affection for Russia. Notably, Napoleon’s war with Russia didn’t just end in 1812. How are the Tartaria conspiracists going to explain the War of the Sixth Coalition, when Russian, Prussian and Austrian troops drove the French out of Germany? Did the bromance suddenly stop because of 1812? Or, is it more reasonable to see 1812 as the end result of the bromance falling apart?

Conclusions

So there you have it, Tartaria in all its glorious nonsensicalness. Words cannot capture how massively bonkers this entire thing is. And best of all, I hardly needed my own sources because so much of it is just a demonstration of terrible reading comprehension. Still, if you want to actually learn about some of the history of Inner Eurasia, see below:

Bibliography

submitted by EnclavedMicrostate to badhistory [link] [comments]


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